Gravity

“For the two of us, home isn't a place. It is a person. And we are finally home.” ― Stephanie Perkins, Anna and the French Kiss I breathed the cold air deep into my lungs. Looking around the white snow around us, I see Sana carrying the boxes silently, and into the small cottage, we have as our new home. It was small, and I heard we could only rely on manual heat rather than electric ones, but it has to do.  It's small, rustic, and in the middle of nowhere in the north of Finland but near the border of Sweden. It was close to evening, but the sun is still up, and I can't help admiring the raw beauty of what's around me. "Mama," I snap my attention to the little boy at my feet. He held on to the hem of my coat while his scarf and thick coat swallow him. "Doko?" Where? I smile encouragingly, "Baby, remember we speak in English or Finnish, remember?" He pouts but nods. We trudge to the porch with him clutching on to my coat as he was still too small as he is just four years old. Sana being a hyper eight-year-old, has already reached the porch with her box of belongings.  "Mama, this house is cute," she says, smiling from ear to ear. "I know, isn't it nice?" I wish I could just carry the struggling toddler, but I have two boxes in my arms, and we needed to move all of our stuff quickly.  Yume nods his head even when he looks entirely focused on his steps. His brows furrowed while he bites his lower lip not to fall over.  On the porch, I look at Sana, who was waiting for us with a smile. Both of us wanted this change, we wanted a new place to start and somewhere far away from where we came from.  "The keys are on my left pocket; just take it," I tell Sana. She takes the keys from my pocket and unlocks the door for us. She pushes open the creaking front door, and the sight of an open house greets us. The small living room had a large fireplace, which I was thankful for.  There wasn't any furniture at all, and it looks skeletal. I look above the high ceilings where the beams were filled with cobwebs and dust. Yume is the first to step in the house, he looks around with such kid-like wonder. He even waddles to the kitchen counter. The coats piled on to him are making it hard for him. "It's not that bad," Sana says, her voice serene and hopeful. Her wide eyes looking at the living room while she puts the box down by the door. her eyes sweep around the room, but then it lands on me with more full eyes, "Mama!"  I see the shadow by my feet. I jump and turn to meet the eyes of a man with blue eyes like a cloudless sky and incredibly blonde hair close to being translucent. He is taller than any of us and incredibly well built.  "He-Hello?" I say, unsurely. Yume and Sana run to hide behind me, dropping whatever they were doing to seek my protection from the stranger. He looks like a marbled statue in a museum. I've been to museums and seen ancient art before, and he looks incredibly like that. A perfect jaw and plump lips, he's Celtic. If I weren't so scared of the stranger, I would've admired him for his beauty "You're the new neighbor, right?" his accent almost made it hard for me to understand him. He looks around our new home and even eyed the closed doors on the side. He suddenly cracks a friendly smile "Do you need any help?"  That smile seems to release the tension around us. Sana and Yume even peeked behind me to look at the tall stranger. They were still wary and cautious, but they were more curious now than anything else.  I also just noticed how he's just wearing a hoodie in this incredibly cold weather. I paid no mind to it, though it did bother me that I didn't hear him coming through the snow or on the rickety porch, we didn't even hear any other vehicles going here.  "Um, we'd appreciate it but don't want any trouble. I'm Amihan, by the way, and these are my kids" I put the boxes down. "This is my eldest, Sana"—I put my hand on her head—"and this is Yume" I lightly bump my hip on the smallest one who only reaches my thigh.  "I'm Sven, I live around here with my parents. They told me to come here and welcome you." I smile "Thank you, I'm sorry, but I didn't hear you coming, so I didn't know how to...act" He laughs, "It's fine, I would have been scared and more aggressive too if a strange man thrice your size comes lumbering in here without talking. I think you know my parents, the Olsens." "Oh!" I relax even further, "You're their son." He nods with such a friendly warmth to his eyes. "One of them, we're going to the same school, actually." "Wait, you're in the same secondary school as me? you look like...I'm sorry I don't mean it" I stop myself, blushing at the thought of having to insult my neighbor and the son of the people that helped me get here He laughs again, the kind of laugh that echoes through the room. "Yeah, I look old. You should see my other brothers. So, need help with anything? I noticed you don't have furniture that much, but I think we can spare some for you." "Really? That would be great, like really great." I look around the bare room. "And if it's not much to ask, I need some help with the boxes left in the car." He glances at the kids on my legs. "No problem, but I think I would need a bit of help for that. You see,"—he crouches down to level with Yume and Sana—"This is all for show, and I can't carry big things. I need your real help for that." Yume beams while Sana giggles at the male attention. "Daijoubu?" Is it alright? Yume asks me with so much light in his eyes. It's hard to refuse him whenever he does that "Baby, English, and yes, it's okay." I tap his small nose and see him walking in his four-year-old way along with Sven. Only Sana is left with me, eyeing him warily and then looking at me for approval. "We can trust him, he's the son of Aunt Mira Olsen." She swallows the lump in her throat and nods "He won't be able to find us here, right?" I froze, everything in me felt cold and unforgiving all of a sudden. Colder than the snow outside of our new home. I hate that she's still so scared of him, I hate that he hurt her so much that she's not the ten-year-old girl that she should be anymore. "No, never." She makes a small smile "Okay, mama" then she runs off I breathed out a heavy sigh, there was a slight burning in my nose because of the cold, and my throat is dry. I need a drink of water, so I went to the kitchen and turn on the tap. I'm taken a bit off guard to see that the water came out brown, which means only one thing. I have more work to do.  Turning the tap off, I looked at the wood stove and decided to explore everything to make a list of what needs fixing. The wood stove is working nicely, but I need to cut some wood outside to make any fire. It seems the kitchen mostly required to be cleaned and dusted more than anything.  "I can also do the plumbing," I jump as I turn to see Sven putting boxes with the label Kitchen on the front. I swear this man is a cat. Who walks that quietly or move that gracefully, especially for a man of his size. "I think I saw your water comes off brown." I bling at him for a few seconds before nodding, "I can probably fix it on my own" "Mama is good at fikshing things" I hear Yume say to him, he has to crane his neck up to meet Sven's eyes. I wonder if his neck is hurting as he does this. "She cawn bwuild thingsh too." I chuckle, "Of course I can, but one thing I can't do is cut firewood. I need to learn how to do that first." "you're not used to living in cold climates, huh?" Sven says, a perfect bushy eyebrow raised in my direction.  I shake my head to answer him while I put the boxes on the counter. I started pulling out cleaning products to wipe the surfaces of the counters and cabinets before putting the plates and utensils in their places.  "Where were you guys originally from?" he leans on the archway of the kitchen.  "The Philippines and Japan," I answer, there was no hiding that fact. I put the things away until I realized I haven't had a look at the rooms.  I excused myself while I went to the smaller rooms before the master bedroom. All of it was bare, but I was glad both of the rooms had a window. The master bedroom had its own bathroom while there was another bathroom down the hall.  The bathroom needed some cleaning, and oddly enough, there was a small bathtub in the masters one. It seems I would only be able to clean this tomorrow, but now the three of us are going to sleep in the living room once we get the fire going.  Stepping back to the living room, it's as if both of my kids have already read my mind. Sana was dusting the living room, and Yume is taking a wet rag to wipe the floor after she finishes. I smile, a warm feeling coming into my chest then the guilt suddenly came Kids are supposed to be kids. They don't need to do the chores. I softly took the broom from Sana's hand with a small smile. "Why don't you and Yume check your rooms and think of a way to decorate them?" "I can do that later." Yume looks up at Sana and me then at Sven, who apparently went outside as he just entered through the door holding firewood.  "You...are so fast" was all I can muster to say to him.  He shrugs with a sheepish smile, "I want to help out, and since you didn't know how to make firewood, I took the liberty to cut some for you. I'll start the fire going if you don't mind." "Please, you've done enough, really," I tell him, while I felt the broom leave my hand and Sana doing her best to push me away with her whole body to continue sweeping. I look down at her with worry but glance back at an amused Sven. "Aren't Aunt Mira and Uncle Yosef looking for you?" "Oh come on, It's fine, really," he puts the firewood in the fireplace. He smiles at me while crouched down and starting the fire. Sana paid no attention to him while Yume squats down with the wet rag, waiting for Sana to finish her job. "You have good kids," he says, low enough so that only I can hear. I look back at him and crouch down beside him. I watch him light the k****e for the fire, I wanted to learn that, and thankfully he was here to do it. "I do, they're the best parts of me" I smile while I watch him blow on the small fire. "Then you're a good person. I hardly see a horrible parent raise such good kids," he says, between blows.  Soon, we had a fire big enough to make the whole living room warm. "Thank you for everything. I wish I can pay you back somehow, but I haven't cooked anything or have enough money to do everything that you—" "hey," he pats my back "It's okay, I just wanted to help, so you don't need to pay me back. My parents would kill me if you do, but also, you're quite amazing to do this all alone with two kids." Blushing, I look away and see that Yume was on all fours while wiping the floors. He had that focused look on his face again with his tongue sticking out. Sana tucked away from the broom and opened the boxes that we kept our futon in. It'll be big enough for the three of us to huddle in together. "Actually, my Mom insists that you stay with us until this house becomes habitable."  "No, this is fine. This is more than fine, really. You guys don't have to do that, I'm sorry for being rude enough to refuse, but seriously, the three are happy with here." He nods, "Okay, but remember we're just one yell away. it's so open here that everything just echoes, and we'd be able to hear you." "Thank you," I say again because I meant it. This person, along with his family, has helped us out so much already. Aunt Mira made so much sacrifice to let us live here indefinitely. She even arranged my and Sana's schooling.  Yume, on the other hand, has to stay in a daycare center since preschool starts at the age of 6 here. I remind myself that that's good because it only meant that he has more time to be a kid before schooling ruins that.  This was an excellent choice, I remind myself. This is the right choice "Well, I see you guys have settled, so my job here is done. I'll go and duck out" he stands his full length that even if I did stand, he was still too tall. I feel like Yume as I crane my neck to look into his eyes.  "Thank you so much" I smile "Don't mention it." He says while leaving our home.  I look around as Sana unrolls the futon and some blankets. Yume is staring at the fire at a safe distance, his smile from ear to ear. Even at moments like this, I needed to remind myself that this was the right choice—the only option for the three of us. Living so far away from everything that we knew. We didn't have any other family left except for each other now, so at least we didn't leave any family that we're close to. We're going to build a home here, make a living, and actually thrive here.  I know it, I can feel it even if I have to work four jobs a day till we make it. I can't give up "Mama, doesn't school start tomorrow?" Sana says to me "It does," I answer her while I took my coat off since it was starting to get warm enough to do so. "I'll be missing the first few days of school while you go to yours." "Then I can miss—" "No," I cut her off before she can say anything more. I know where it's already leading anyway. "Baby, you shouldn't miss out on making friends. It's the first day for everyone, which means you'll make friends. The first day is important to make your own solid friend group." She pouts, "I'll be an outsider anyway. I can't speak that much of Finnish, and I look really different from them." I sit on my legs beside her "Hush, you're going to be great. My baby is pretty, nice, smart, and kind. They'll love you, and if they don't, then it's their loss." I cup her cheeks and kiss her nose. "You're an amazing kid, no one can deny that" "Okay," she whispers, she still looks unsure and doesn't seem to believe me. I sigh while I let her cheeks go and pull her into a cuddle.  "It's going to be fine" I kiss the top of her head. "We're going to be fine." Because fate can't be that bad to make us suffer.