Burned (book 5)

Starting over

Amelia's p.o.v

I stand here with my gun in my hand as I walk around and check the perimeter. Lately things have been too quiet. I feel like this is the calm before the storm. Like something big is about to happen. I can always feel it in my chest. I felt it that night many years ago and the days after. I try to shake these feelings but I can't help it. It's been 3 years since that day. The day that my whole life changed.

*Flashback* I look so cute and I am so excited to go meet with Miles. He turned 18 today and his parents are throwing this huge party for him and to announce that he will be Alpha and I will be the Luna. We are so happy. I also just found out that I am pregnant and he said his dad was okay with it. I am sure his mom will be too. We are going to sit both of our parents down after his party and tell them and set up something up. He is going to claim me and we will be together forever, We get to Black River and I just can't wait. I wish I was 18 and had my wolf already so I can feel what he feels. I rush inside because I just want to see Miles already, I miss him so much. I turn the corner and walk in the door and I spot him. I notice that he just stands there, so I run over and hug him. He doesn't say anything, but I can feel that he is tense and I just feel a weird vibe right now and it all clicks. We aren't fated mates. Disappointment floods me body and I want to cry. I'm pregnant, what am I going to do? We just assumed we were mates and turns out we are not. I pull away from him and he just stares at me. I am about to ask him if we are mates or not so I can get some kind of confirmation, when he turns around and I hear some chick say the words that I expected him to say to me MATE. She wraps her arms around him and claims him as hers. My whole world comes down crashing all around me. I feel like I can not breathe. This can not be happening right now. The love of my life belongs to someone else. He is not mine. The moon goddess did not think that we belong together. "I want to go home" I tell my parents. I hear Alpha Damien apologize to my parents. I just remember dad getting me out of there. I sit in our truck going back home and I am crying. I try to be strong but I can't help it. I break down. Mom hugs me. "It's okay sweetie, your mate will come along and this will be a thing of the past. You can even pick a chosen mate. This isn't the end of the world Amelia." dad says. I look up and look at Wolf. My brother, my bestfriend. "It's okay sissy, cry, but tomorrow you get up and be the bad Alpha female that you are and show them that this didn't knock you down. The moon goddess works in mysterious ways and your mate is probably some badaśśs king or something. She won't leave you hanging" he tells me and kisses my forehead to try to make me feel better.

*2 days later*

My phone has not stopped ringing. Miles has been calling me, but I do not think we should speak, atleast not right now. He found his mate and he deserves to be happy. I hear that there is nothing like a mate bond and he deserves to feel it and have all of the happiness in the world, even if it doesn't come from me. He deserves everything so I text him. "Miles, it's okay, I am okay. Enjoy your mate. I am happy for you. Do not worry about the you know what. He or she is good. Go live your life" I text him. I tell Clara and Wolf to come over and hang out with me. I just need my siblings right now because my parents have locked themselves in their room.

I cry in pain. "Amelia, I have to get you to the pack clinic. The dr has to check you" Wolf yells. I have no idea what is going on. We were hanging out, eating popcorn and just talking, when I got a really bad pain. Clara knows about my pregnancy, but Wolf doesn't and he is freaking out right now. I have no idea what is wrong but my stomach hurts so bad. Wolf throws me on a bed and the dr asks me a bunch of questions. "I'm pregnant" is all I can say. "Melly what the fùck! You let that aśśhole knock you up?" Wolf shouts out. I feel bad. I love Wolf and I love Miles, but those two have never gotten along. I see WOlf is the distance as the Dr takes me away further into an examination room. "Miss Amelia" the dr says shaking me. I wake up and look at him. "You scared us for as moment, you were not waking up. I am so sorry, but you lost your pup. You suffered a miscarriage and there was nothing we could do to save your pregnancy" He says and I can't even see or hear anything. I start crying. This can't be happening. I already lost Miles, now I lost our pup. I cry and allow Wolf into the room with me. He stays here and doesn't even make me call my parents. He is literally my bestfriend, my brother, my most trusted person. I text my mom though and let her know and she is in the room in less than 10 minutes mourning with me. Wolf steps out so I can have some privacy. "Mom, it hurts so bad. Not the physical pain, but me losing my pup mommy. How will I move on from this?" I ask her. "I'm sorry babygirl" she cries. "Please let Miles and his parents know." I say and she nods. "I will my princess. Please just rest." she says "Mommy please tell the king that I am ready to join his military as soon as I turn 18. I need to get out of here. I need to forget. I can't watch Miles move on without me. I can't watch people find their mates and have babies when I just lost everything. I want to focus on becoming a better person. I want to help others. I also want dad to make Wolf our Alpha" I say and she looks at me in shock.

*end flashback*

Now I walk around and check the property. The king sent us here because they are trafficking children and taking she wolves so right now we have to protect them. Apparently years ago they thought they had taken them down, but soon enough they set back up and noone has been able to take their organization down ever since, These people are Hunters, with especially, vampires, all kinds of supernaturals so we got our scents blocked and they do not know that we are wolves. I enrolled into the werewolf military when I turned 18. Wolf went off to Alpha training for 2 years, then he came here right after. I am now 21 and still here, Wolf will be going home to be sworn in as Alpha next weekend. I realized that I did not want to be the Alpha and I want to help people instead. I have been on so many missions now and they have helped me forget, but then I see Alexis, Miles's mom at meetings and his face, his touch, everything about him comes flooding back. I recently told my father I want to open up a bar in our pack. With Wolf returning home, I think I want to return as well. I'm not 100 percent sure but dad says the bar is almost done. I think he wants me back home too so he made sure to build the bar as quickly as he could. Our pack has expanded throughout the years, mostly shopping stores for clothes and food, electronics. We have a bakery and a couple of restaurants, but we do not have a bar and I want to open one up. I want to have somewhere to go to when I come home tired from work and need a drink or want to go out with friends and overall just to get drunk and forget how shìtty my life is. Yes I have picked up drinking a little here and there, but it has helped me cope with losing my pup. It isn't the healthiest way to do things, but It helps me not feel anything. I do not know what happened to Miles. No, actually I do know. From what I heard Alexis and mom talking one day, he and his mate weren't in a good place, but I never asked what was going on and he never tried to contact me either, we didn't keep in touch. Losing him even as just a friend really hurt me, so I asked my parents not to speak about him to me. Mom and dad focus on our missions. Yes we all go on the same missions sometimes or the King has one of us go and the rest listening in with a back up plan incase something goes wrong. We often work with Alexis and I am sure mom told Alexis not to bring Miles up, because she has never brought him up as well as I think it is better this way. I can just focus on healing and my job that right now is protecting these people who we got out of Bailey's. They are being hunted so we have to keep them safe until we can find a place to put them. A new pack either here or in a different country. Unfortunately we couldn't get everyone out, just a couple of pups and some families. I guard these people until my shift is over and go back to the castle to get my orders for tomorrow. Alexis is sitting here, talking to the king. Maybe I should ask to be sent far away to a new location on missions far away from here. To a different state or country, because Everytime I see her I remember Miles and it hurts all over again. One day it won't hurt anymore. One day I will move on. Hopefully tomorrow will be that day. Yes, tomorrow I will start over.