Secret Affinity

2

The first time I made blueberry muffins was one of the best learning experiences with Mom on top of a baking disaster. They were burnt to little black crisps, and I swore I'd never make them again. But here I was adding fresh blueberries into a bowl full of batter on the kitchen counter.

I grabbed the grocery list magnetized to the refrigerator door. Other than the ingredients to a tasty neighbour's gift, Dad hadn't bought any other groceries.

The smell of blueberry spread to every room by early evening. The muffins cooled while I prepared a nice basket Dad found at a gift shop. Biting my lip, I walked next door with the basket and muffins.

Elise opened the door. "Ari! What a surprise." Her eyes shifted to the basket. "What’s this?"

"Homemade blueberry muffins," I replied. "A thank-you gift for your help."

"You shouldn't have." She took the basket and created room through the doorway. "Come inside."

"Oh, no. I was just..."

"Come on in. Take a look around," she insisted. "You can meet Liara and Andy on the way." Figuring it would be impolite, I followed her into the house.

There were thuds and voices in the living room, and the floor was scattered with toys from a Barbie doll to a miniature car. The small frame of a boy was surrounded by Legos and another little girl circled the room with lightning speed. So many things. So many people. It appeared like an actual home.

"Hey! It's the lady from next door!" Liara said, pointing at me. I waved and she handed me a doll with a broken leg. "Fix this for me."

"Liara," Grandma warned her.

"Let's try," I said. Mom had always fixed toys for me, and Dad broke them again when we played together. The nostalgia was refreshing as I worked around Barbie's missing joint. Once I finished, I looked towards Elise. "I should probably get going."

Before she could reply, the main door opened and Evin stepped in. He spotted me while bending to remove his shoes. "Oh, hey Ari. You came to visit?"

Screams exploded from behind me and Liara and Andy crowded their brother. Evin groaned and Elise laughed. I couldn't fight the smile off my face as I watched the love radiate from them.

"Ari, are you staying home all by yourself?" Elise asked me.

"Yeah, but I have to go grocery shopping," I said. Elise and Evin shared a look, and that was it for my neighbours to take me on a detailed tour around the hottest markets in town.

Shopping plazas in Brilliant Cove were bustling commercial sites. Riding in Evin's car, I got a good look around at the people walking with strollers and dogs, and the greenery that resembled suburbia. Funny though, since Dad told me this was one the most urbanized cities in the country.

The grocery store we’d gone to was huge. Dad told me he had troubled almost every sales clerk to figure out where items were last week.

"I want Oreos!" Liara said, tugging Evin's arm. She ran off apart from Evin's remarks.

"Anything you want, Little A?" he asked the quietest one among us. Andy was inside the shopping cart, and he hadn't said a word yet. I perceived him to be the shiest in the family, although I didn't know what connection I was trying to draw.

We ended up in the snack section, where Liara was attempting to balance a pyramid of Oreos and Reese's Peanut Buttercups in her arms.

"Liara, no more cavities for you," Elise said sternly.

"Are you taking some to school?" Andy asked me, and I was startled to hear his tiny, soft voice. "Rice Krispies are good for big girls." I assured him I'd buy some.

"You're going to Juniper High?" Evin asked me. I nodded, and he and Elise shared a look. "How are you planning to get there?"

"I can walk." I looked back and forth at their unsmiling faces. "Is something wrong?"

"It's a twenty-minute walk," Elise told me, and turned to Evin. "Why not let Arian take her to school?"

Evin put Liara's Oreos back on the shelf. "I don't know. Mum will hate that."

"She's just a little overprotective. Arian's got a car and we live right next door."

"Even if mum is okay with it, he won't take her," Evin said. Amid their talk, he noticed my confusion. "Arian's the second oldest," he clarified, and rubbed his chin. "You can say he's the second missing child." Oh. It was strange how I hadn't met the rest of Julianna's children yet.

When we returned home, I put all the groceries away and stashed the bags under the sink. I caught a glimpse of the photo I left on counter as I stood. Blowing a piece of hair from my face, I took the photo and threw it into one of the drawers assuming the previous owners perhaps forgot it here.

Close to dinner, I awaited Dad's call. Even if he was busy, five minutes of phone time was enough to satisfy me. As I talked about the McCoys, I hadn't noticed the smile on my face, like I found some light in my lonely life.

"They remind me of us. You, Mom, and me. As a family. You know, only bigger," I said. The other end went silent.

I always thought about family, and the feeling of being loved and being 'one'. I would never admit I lost that feeling after losing Mom.

"Tell you what," Dad said softly. "You can visit them anytime you'd like. Julianna already told me she'd love for you to come over, and you can continue your babysitting with the McCoy children."

It was a nice thought. To interact with people, have fun with the kids, and be useful somehow. Days in my life have been too monotonous, and I was ready for a change.

I watched T.V. for about an hour before going to bed. In the dark, I felt safe under a ceiling of shining stars. When under stress, anxiety, when I couldn't sleep, when I watched a horror movie, I would count the stars and imagine Mom in every single one. In every bad situation, she knew what to do and how to make it better. I wasn't sure if I was like Mom. Maybe I didn't know myself well yet.

Sleep fell on me without me noticing, and somewhere between my sleep, I felt a kiss on my forehead. Maybe it was Dad, or it could've been Mom. But I imagined both, and that both were real.