Wimp!

Chapter Ten

[PAUL]

Travis and I were in the mall together getting some things for the pool party he had planned. We were both in casual clothes — pale blue jeans and random tees. We were currently picking out things for a BBQ, but my mind wasn't really on the meat Travis was getting out from the freezer. I was thinking about how rowdy the place Travis had rented for the party would be. I haven't seen most of his friends in ages, and maybe a part of me was a bit anxious. They weren't my friends, and I never really got to know them much since Travis was on his way to graduating when we started going out.

I'd voiced my concerns to him when he was in my room the other day. He had told me things would work out, and if I really hated being around them he would drive me back home and stay with me.

"I like staying with you better anyway," he had said in an off-handed way. I had laughed too, but I would be lying if I said my insides didn't feel warm as my cheeks burned from his comment. I liked Travis a lot and learning that he liked me just as much always made my day.

I had told Alex what Sam said. He just frowned a bit, looking away before he continued talking to Chris. I'm not sure Sam's apology meant much to him, but it was a little disheartening to see that he hadn't changed much. They were both going to meet at the pool party, and I hoped they'd sort things out.

Chris's sister started interacting with Alex a bit more. He seemed surprised by that, but I could spot the glimmer in his eyes from time to time. When she left to head back home early I the morning Alex asked after her when he got up. I'm not sure what happened, but Chris probably had something to do with their bettered less petty relationship.

"Why are you thinking about?" Travis' question brought me out of my thoughts. I blinked, realizing that he was done selecting the packs of meat, and was now just staring at me as he held on to the shopping cart. I muttered 'nothing' under my breath before running a hand through my dark hair. Travis just sighed before giving me a small smile. I've been spacing out a lot lately, and I think Travis knew it had to do with the upcoming party.

Travis looked away from me, staring into the distance with a thoughtful look on his face. "I think we're done here, should we leave?" he asked, turning to face me. I blinked, looking away when I realized I had been staring at him. I couldn't help it. It was just hard to comprehend that I was really dating him. It's been two years, but I can't forget looking at him from a safe distance and just getting wound up and sad.

Travis has never asked me how long I've liked him. I've liked him since I was a sophomore. I guess walking past the practice field and being able to look one person in the eye (him) without being frightened played a part in it. I'd watch him from a distance ­— hang around the practice field before I started my walks home. Travis didn't know I existed then. Travis didn't know I was that one small kid that sat in the audience during school games just to see him. Travis didn't know I was that random gay kid that got outed during sophomore year because someone searched my phone.

Travis didn't know any of that. I had been invisible to him, and it still stunned me that I woke up to him beside me most days than not now. Sometimes I wonder if I'm daydreaming. I used to daydream a lot back in high school.

"Paul? Is something wrong?" I looked up, realizing I haven't answered his question yet. Travis' dark blonde brows were knitted into a small concerned frown, and his blue-green eyes were looking me up and down like he would suddenly figure out what was going on in my head. I smiled a bit, shaking my head before walking over and taking a hold of the cart instead.

"It's nothing," I said touching some things in the cart.

"We could watch a movie if you want," I said, answering Travis' question from before. I didn't really want to watch one. Travis and I had very different tastes, but as long as I got to hang around him for a little longer, I guess I don't mind. I watched as a goofy grin took form on his face, and soon he was chatting on to me as we left the store for his car in the parking lot. We moved the stuff we bought to the back seat, and Travis headed for the driver's seat while I sat in the passenger seat up front. He didn't really care much about music, so I messed with the radio all I wanted.

"So, what do you want to watch?" Travis asked, looking at me before turning back to the road ahead. I shrugged. "Anything you want to watch," I said, and he beamed from cheek to cheek. This was something we usually did — random sweet dates. It was nice, and it was comforting that we still wanted to be around each other so much after dating for a while. Even though I won't say it to Alex or Chris' faces. I looked up to them. I wanted my relationship with Travis to be last that long and to be that enduring.

"We'll watch something I've wanted to see in a while." I heard Travis say as I came out of my thoughts. He took a turn, before driving down the familiar road that had the local movie theater at its end. We got down, and I hung around Travis as he paid for the tickets and grabbed us some snacks. I felt my face flush when his eyes met with mine when he suddenly turned to make sure I was following. He smiled, reaching out to grab my hand before tucking our joined hands in his jacket's pocket. The sound of my heart beating filled my ears, and I couldn't really concentrate on what he was telling me as we walked into the theatre and headed for seats in the back.

The movie started when the advertisements finished running. The rowdiness in the theatre died down, and it was replaced with odd shuffling and whispering. I looked from the screen to Travis, wondering what he was so excited about. We didn't share many tastes, but I really didn't mind tagging along with him when he wanted to do things he liked, and it was the same the other way around.

"Did you see that?" Travis asked in an excited whisper. He was leaning into me now, and my eyes had gone wide from brief confusion before I relaxed. He looked away almost immediately after, rattling on to me from time to time as one explosion or the other took place on screen. A smile was on my face. Don't get me wrong. I was bored — bored right out of my mind, but as long as I got to hold on to Travis' hand as he jumped around his seat like a child. I was content.

"Paul."

"Hmm...?" Before I could really tell what was going on I felt lips on mine. It was a brief kiss, with a bit of tongue. I blinked when Travis pulled away, a little confused as to why I was getting kissed out of nowhere. I couldn't really make much of him in the dark apart from his outline and hair. He squeezed my hand, making me look down at our hands that were holding on to each other on the arm of his chair.

"You're bored." It wasn't a question. It was a statement. I let out a sigh as Travis let out a knowing hum.

"You should have told me you didn't want to go." Even though I couldn't see him pouting, I just knew he was. This happened on repeat. I'll tag along to do whatever with him, but he'd end up apologizing for boring me.

"Do you want to leave?" he asked, making me look away from our hands to the screen in front of us. The movie was still going on, and I'd feel guilty dragging Travis out of here just because I wasn't into it.

"We can go, I won't be mad," Travis urged, making me play with my fingers. He was leaning in close — maybe a little too close because I could spot a head or two turning to look at us. My cheeks were burning. Travis didn't really care about being too close or obvious in public. On one hand, it made me happy, but sometimes I worried that not everyone would mind their business and that someone might cause a scene. "Come on, I could always watch it later," he insisted, squeezing my hand.

With some hesitation, I nodded, and soon we left the theatre together with Travis holding my hand and tucking it into his pocket I couldn't help smiling as we headed for the parking lot. Travis started talking about the movie again, and I couldn't help spacing out as I looked at him. It didn't matter what anyone said about him — that he was dumb, aggressive, childish. He was mine, and that's what mattered. I loved him so much that it scared me sometimes.

He's mine. I thought when we got to the car and Travis didn't even give me time to settle down before he made to kiss me. He pulled me closer, my skin pressed against the gears, but the pain didn't matter much since I had his tongue in my mouth, and mine in his. I toppled a bit, and I was soon on his lap. It was uncomfortable, but it didn't matter. Travis' hands touching me under my shirt had me flushed and occupied. We broke to take a breath, and Travis kissed up my neck before pulling away to give me a smile.

"Can I come over?" he asked, and I snorted before we both laughed. He always came over, he might as well move into Chris and Alex's apartment too.

"That's a yes?" he asked when our laughter died down, and I nodded. It was definitely a yes. Heck, when didn't he come over? He hummed, resting back on his seat as he played with strands of my hair. "You're so cute," he muttered, and I was sure my face became redder.

"I want to kiss you all day," he said before pulling me into a tight hug. I snuggled in, not protesting. I loved this. I loved Travis.

He's mine. My heart didn't stop pounding as we kissed and touched. The words kept repeating themselves in my mind, and each time I had a dose of happy hormones fill my veins. I did really have the boy of my dreams, and he loved me just as much as I loved him. Back in high school, I would have never imagined this as a sophomore with a crush on the star soccer player.