Skaydal - Unsettled Beta

3

Zack

I shouldn’t be upset. All of this is my own fault and yet, all I can think about is Mato and how angry he looked. I tried to pay attention to whatever Grayson was talking about, but all I could think about was Mato and what I was supposed to do.

“Have you managed to get all of the information on every single one of our residents and members?” Grayson questioned, and I glanced over at him. We were in his office, and I did my best to act like my usual self.

“Yes,” I said with a nod. “I have the list, their occupations, family details, everything,”

“Good, because I feel like this is too much for me,” he then said softly and as much as I wanted to dive right into his problems, I was still thinking about Mato.

“I understand,” I said. What I meant was, I felt the same way. I felt like I was out of my element, and I had no idea what to do next.

“What’s on your mind?” Grayson suddenly asked and I flinched. Was I that transparent?

“Nothing,” I lied as I finally looked over at him. Eye contact was everything, especially if I wanted him to believe me.

“What aren’t you telling me?” he questioned and, for a split second, I considered telling him the truth.

“Nothing,” I lied again as I looked down at my hands. I guess eye contact didn’t make me believable.

“Is this about Mato?” the question threw me, and I felt myself blushing even though I tried to hide my face. “Tell me,” he urged. I couldn’t tell him. What would I say? I met my mate and all I’ve done is avoid him and treat him like s**t? No, I couldn’t do that.

“There is nothing to tell,” I was on a roll with the lies and the guilt hit me in full force.

“Really, Zack? Is that how it is?” Grayson spat out as he abruptly stood up. “Is he your mate?” I wasn’t surprised that he picked up something, but I wasn’t about to confirm or deny anything. “Silence is also an answer,” I maintained my silence while Grayson seethed at me from across the desk. “Right, so he is your mate but…he doesn’t want you? You don’t want him? What is the problem here, Zack?”

“I told you, there is nothing to tell,” I had to hold back the urge to confide in him. This wasn’t his problem to solve, it was my own.

“So, you are ignoring each other…pretending your mate bond doesn’t exist? Is that it?” I hated how it hit the nail on the head.

“Something like that,”

“Damnit, Zack…talk to me!” Grayson then hissed out as he came around the desk and perched on the corner. He was studying me, and I did my best to keep my features neutral. It wasn’t easy. “You’ve always been there for me, and you single-handedly got this merged pack organized. So, please, tell me what’s going on,” I jumped up. This was too much, and I couldn’t handle it. I didn’t want to handle it. This was so beyond me that I wasn’t even sure how to handle it. With one final look at my Alpha, I stalked toward the door. However, before I walked out, I glanced at him over my shoulder.

“When I’m ready to talk, I’ll talk,” and, with that, I left the office. I wasn’t even sure where I was going as I left the pack house, but as I started making my way toward my car, I figured I would just take a drive. I needed to think, and I needed to get my head and my feelings together. For as long as I could remember, I had always wanted to be with my mate, and as the years rolled by and I didn’t meet him or her, I gave up hope. On top of that, I wasn’t prepared to miss out on life and so I had done everything I could to live each day to the best of my ability. I slept around with whoever was interested. I didn’t do relationships. I didn’t do commitments and I sure as hell didn’t do love. I loved Grayson like a brother, but that was as far as my feelings went. I partied. I entertained myself at every given opportunity. Grayson had been worried about me when I had gone to see the elders and yet, I hadn’t told him the truth. Because the truth was, I had been hooking up with a sweet girl and had neglected my duties. That had resulted in Sierna making a run for it and Benjamin capturing her. I shook my head as I drove out of Skaydal with no destination in mind.

I parked my car across the road from the popular bar in Dexter and got out. The evening air was warm and, despite the breeze that whipped through my hair, it was hot.

“Hey Zack,” the bouncer greeted me with a smirk, and I smiled. “I wasn’t expecting you to be back here so soon,” his remark was correct. I rarely hit the same bar in one week and everyone knew that. I wasn’t a stranger to Dexter and while Greg – the bouncer – waited for me to give him an answer I never would, I simply shrugged. He stepped aside and I entered the bar, which was called Dax, and headed straight for the bar.

“What can I get for you?” the bartender asked, and I eyed the young man curiously.

“I haven’t seen you around here before,” I said as I sat down on the barstool. The night was still young and that meant the bar wasn’t as busy, which was something for which I was actually grateful. I wasn’t in the mood to party; I just wanted to have a drink and relax.

“I started here yesterday,” he said as he wiped down the counter. “Names Luke,”

“Zack,” I said as I continued to watch him. He was tall and lean with smooth-looking dark skin and short black hair. His brown eyes darted over to me a few times and it was clear to me that I made him nervous. I wasn’t sure why though.

“What can I get for you?” he asked again.

“Whatever you have on tap,” I said as I turned around and scoped out the bar. I wasn’t interested in looking for a hookup, but I did spot a sexy figure that I knew all too well. Once Luke had given me a tall glass of beer, I slid off the stool and headed over to the pool table. “Well, well, well, if it isn’t the sexy and fun Missy,” she stood up and turned around to look at me and I smiled. “Looking good,” and she did look good. I knew exactly how good she looked naked, but I wasn’t here for a hook-up and I never hooked up with the same person more than once.

“Why, Zack, what brings you to Dax so soon?” her sultry voice went straight to my groin and the guilt instantly popped up to calm me down. I wasn’t a free man, not anymore. I had a mate, and it didn’t matter what was going on between Mato and me, I wouldn’t do this to him. I couldn’t.

“Just looking to relax,” I drawled out as I eyed the pool table. Missy was an advert player and it looked to me like she was close to finishing the game.

“Let me just…” she pointed over her shoulder and threw me a wink and I watched her lean over, position the stick and sink the final ball. The guy with whom she was playing against groaned before handing over some money, which Missy pocketed before she turned to me. “How about I help you relax?”

“Ah…no,” I said quickly.

“We don’t have to go very far,” she flirted as she came toward me and ran her fingers down my chest. This was a bad idea, but I found myself leaning into her.

“What did you have in mind?” I asked softly. Missy gently took my beer from my hand and set it down on the nearest table. She then led me toward the back and even though I knew exactly where she was going, I didn’t stop her. I knew what was about to happen and I wasn’t going to stop it. She pushed back the curtain and revealed a small room. I stepped inside and I heard her pull the curtain back into place. This was Dax. The bar with the hook-up rooms, which were so small, I was pressed up against Missy’s curvy body. I opened my mouth, desperately wanting to put an end to this, but when she sunk to her knees and reached for my belt, I snapped my mouth closed. This was a bad idea. I knew that, but I needed this distraction.

Guilt gnawed at me all the way home and I wasn’t sure what to do about it. This whole thing with Mato had messed me up and, despite the glorious blowjob Missy had given me, I was tensed up really badly. It was late and Skaydal was asleep and as I drove past Mato’s house, I spotted a light coming from one of the windows. I slowed down and when the curtain moved and I saw Mato staring out at me, I stepped on the brakes. I could feel his anger and his pain and for a moment I was confused by it. Why was my mate so unhappy? And then suddenly I understood. He knew. Mato knew what I had done, and the guilt made me feel sick. I turned off the car and got out. Mato came out of the house, and I froze as I watched him get closer and closer. Would he hit me?

“What the hell, Zack?” he questioned, and I decided to play innocent.

“What? Can’t a guy drive past his mate’s house?” Mato’s eyes went wide, and I tried to think about what I had said that would give him that reaction.

“That is the first time you have acknowledged me as your mate, Zack,” he whispered, and I was stunned into silence. He was right. “But it doesn’t matter, does it?” he asked, and I frowned.

“What?”

“We may not have mated and completed the bond but I…I felt that Zack, I know what you did. Well, not exactly what you did, but I know you hooked up with someone,” Mato was rambling, and the anger was coming off him in waves. I didn’t blame him.

“I didn’t know,” I muttered.

‘Didn’t know what?” he asked as he folded his arms across his chest.

“I didn’t know you could feel it or whatever,”

“Would that have changed anything? Would you have…I don’t know…maybe not have hooked up?” his question was valid, but I didn’t understand it. I was confused and when he threw up his hands in frustration, I felt his pain. “Clearly you don’t care, because even though I am standing right here, yet you still hooked up with someone else,”

“I was stressed,” I said in defense, and Mato stalked closer to me. I held my breath as his closeness made me feel overwhelmed and dizzy.

“Hey, Zack…”

“Yeah?” my eyes were glued to his lips, and I was mesmerized.

“You were stressed and needed someone to help you relax?”

“Yeah,”

“You could’ve come to me, your mate,” he spat out the words and then stalked back into his house. I stood there as the realization of what he had just said hit me.

“Ah, s**t,”