Chapter Fifty-Four: Boundaries II
2036 Words
Azalea Oleander Cursix
Protect Fuscia? PROTECT HER?
Will she even let me come near her? But, but this is fine. I never intended for the concubines to harm her, so I guess doing it from a distance can help her when she ascends the throne, so all should be well if I confirm his request.
“Okay, should I move on to rule number two, or are we still unsettled?” I asked.
“Yes, please let us move on. However, do not forget your promise.”
“Of course not.”I muttered, “Okay, rule number two: I am not your friend.”
“What?”
“Simple, I am not your friend. I am who I am before I am your friend. I will help, guide and teach you to navigate the mess in the palace; however, at the end of the day, we are neither friends nor lovers, merely wedded acquaintances.”
“Bu- but, I don’t understand, we have the same goal?”
“Yes, we do.” I replied, “Think about it this way; I am only sparing both you and me some heartbreak. Friendships come expectations. My purpose here is not to..well…meet them? What I mean is that you will and should cater to your needs while I cater to mine.”
“So, in a sense, you want me to expect you to let me down?” he asked, leaning forward.
A dangerous stance that added to his bulk, and almost instinctively, I leaned back as if waiting for him to pounce my treacherous body.
Shit.
I crossed my hands over my chest to at least close myself off from him, but all this act did was cause his gaze to drop to my breasts.
I should call him out. I should do something to halt him right then and there in his tracks before whatever was pulling us grew more complicated.
But before the correct and proper words could form in my mind, I squeezed my throbbing core to relieve its ache, but all it did was tempt me into nearly grinding the couch. My breasts felt heavy and sensitive, my respiration more laboured, but that was probably because I felt reluctant to take breaths. I did not want to. My n*****s had hardened at his gaze; thus, with every inhale and exhale, they rubbed deliciously against my soft brazier.
If I knew any better, I would reschedule the rest of the meeting to be continued at dinner, where there will be a grand table between us. There I would not watch for the darkening of his gaze or seek clues as to why he pressed a pillow against his groin. There I wouldn’t do that, at least, I hope I wouldn’t.
“Something along those lines,” I replied.
For a while, he said nothing, and a self-conscious chill crept down my back.
Could he tell of my arousal?
“If you wish to speak of the matter, please, go forth-,” I offered.
“I do not understand you. What..what is your objective here?”
“I do not know if I should say.”
“What? What kind of answer is that?”
“An honest one.” I began, “Aleu, I do my very best not to tell lies. However, because I cannot very well reveal everything to one who is not ready, I tend to keep things to myself.”
“Others call it an omitted lie, but to me, it can not be easily dismissed as such. so again, my explaining myself will be of no benefit in this situation.”
“So, in short, your main objective is to manipulate me?”
“Do explain yourself.”
“From your rules, one can garner that you expect something out of me, a particular behaviour or action. You wish me to be suspicious of you.”
“Brava!” I responded, “How observant of you!”
“What I am most curious about is why? Why do you want me to be suspicious of you? I understand your- well, I do not really understand it, but I accepted your conclusion of the relationship, so why do you still feel the need to host pretences?”
“Because it is obvious, is it not?”
“That you are not on my side?” he asked.
“I am. I am on your side. However, not fully.” I said, “If something were to happen that threaten my interests, then I can not take your side. No, let me correct that. I will not take your side in that particular matter.”
Aleu was silent for a moment before forced laughter pooled out of him.
“I guess you deserve points for your refreshingly brutal honesty.”
Though it was forced, and though only a sneer dressed his handsome face, the sound of his laugh licked through me.
“Rule number three, no love can sprout from our relationship. Well, no love on your part, on mine, since I am dying, I feel no need to restrict myself.”
“Funny, I thought you would say that we should not have any relations.”
“We do not need to; however, we will be sharing chambers twice in every month as tradition dictates to allow an opportunity to sire heirs. Of course, those will be the pretences, but during those nights, we can do something else, I can teach you a skill, or we can discuss a case, whatever….”
“Hmm… I see, so we can have s*x?”
“Yes.”
“But we will not be?”
“Yes…? Is this going somewhere?” I frowned, “You may feel the need to be faithful to Fuscia, and I shall not stand in your way.”
He stiffened at the mention of Fuscia, almost as though he had, for a moment, forgotten her.
“Hmm, no relations are fine.” He said quickly, “And what of you garnering emotions for me?”
“I am a dying woman. Treat it as granting an old romantic a favour. You need not pay any heed to it. Hell, it will be beneficial if you do not, chances are I will keep my feelings to me.”
“Will you be seeing other men?”
“That option is not off the table for me. As I said, I am a hopeless romantic. Do not worry. At the end of the day, I will still come back to the Emperor; however, in just the same way you have permission to stray, I have the same.”
“I do not want you to.”
“Huh?”
Courtesy out of the window, what the hell was he saying.
“My second condition is that you must not see other men.”
“WHAT?”
“Now I have two-,”
“Are you sick? No.”
“So you want to see other men that badly, despite having me by your side?”
“Are you- can, can you even hear yourself? You will have a harem to your name,” I frowned, “I..am I… are we talking about something else?”
“Am I reacting to a different conversation?” I asked.
*
*
*
Virginia Nissa Luciano
The afternoon was warm and breezy. The sound of the grass rustling, thrashed about by harsh winds signalling the nearness of autumn, lulled Virginia’s overeager senses as Leeroy walked two steps behind her.
“I asked you to walk with me. By my side, as in matching my pace. Why do you insist on staying behind me?”
“I am a slave, my lady. There are certain privileges denied for-.”
“So? I am giving you permission to walk by my side? Do you wish to keep punishing me for something that I did because I was young and stupid?”
No, that is not it. That is not what Virginia wished to say.
She wished to say that she was sorry and would wholeheartedly permit him to hate her, though she would not prefer it. She wished to say that she would work tirelessly to regain his favour...she wished to give him the world as an apology for her hideous cowardice...she wished to…she wished to say something that would not come off…ugly!
“Never, my lady.” He responded.
Virginia’s lip wobbled. Nothing was getting through to him. However, it was the curtness of his replies that seared through her worse than his silently disobeying her orders in preference to slave customs.
It has been almost a decade… she reasoned, of course, he would not forgive her.
“So who was she?” she asked, rather than apologise as she had intended to.
“Who was who, my lady?”
“The maid, the one I saw you flirting with as I entered the palace.”
“You mean the maid who was assisting me in laying out the pipes for the new fountain?”
“Oh…and, what about the woman in black? She looked like a noble?”
“My lady, are you taking advantage of my oath?”
“No, of course not, leeroy, I am…I am trying to apologize.”
“Forgive this ignorant slave, but throughout this entire conversation, I could not pinpoint where the apology began and where it ended, but take no offence, I was not that sharp in my studies.”
Lies, he was her only competition. Actually, it was more than a lie. He was mocking her.
“Is that supposed to be a joke Leeroy, this is not easy for me? I am trying!!”
“Yes, my lady, I see that you also have markings on your porcelain smooth back from all the whippings that you have received by drunkards looking for a jolly ride.”
Her chest tightened.
“I- I did what I could, and I was so young, we were both young!” she stammered, “I-if any of news of…our relationship would have come out then my father would have lost his alliance with the Theodores. At the time that was very important to us, the trade routes had all been-”
“Yes, I do agree with you. You certainly did all that you could. However, As this slave does not understand the finer innings of nobility, I would rather we keep the conversation strictly on pastures.”
“Leeroy! I am trying…” her breathing hitched, and her stomach sank, it was slight, but she understood it as the onset of her anxiety attacks. “I…”
“Excuse me,” she said, then halted.
“Virginia quieted her mind by focusing on the slight lull of the afternoon, the sound of the birds, the breeze against the dried-up summer grass and within no time, the turmoil n her being had settled.
“What I mean is that I will not just offer you an apology and leave it at that. I want to free you. I want to help you regain your life.”
“The life that you took? The life that meant so little to you that-,”
The turmoil inside of her was returning, and in the sense of hastened panic, she interrupted.
“You are stressing me out. This should be simple, I love-,” she stopped, “I mean-“
“I reject your offer, My lady.” He said curtly, “I feel nothing but hatred and discomfort towards you.”
Just like that, the world in Virginia’s mind seemed to have halted.
"B-but we...you said that you understood."
"No, you asked me to understand why you loved me and still did what you did, and I do, I did, " he said, "But I just never understood how you managed to make love feel so hideous, such that I never want, even an ounce of it again."
- Writer
