Eight 'O' Clock

[4] Suffering

I gagged when my eyes fell on the burly beard with tose dark eyebrows where a ton of lice could live in hiding. To feel his lips on mine would be a big curse as well as a blessing, as to how Jessy the bully whispered 'You can make your lover jealous" and another girl who looked like a nerd said, "Plump lips". But my eyes were searching for his. His eyes were boring holes into mine leaving me culpable and hesitating.

I  mouthed him my concerns but he just averted his gaze, which left me stabbed in the gut. For a minute., Alona sensed the tension in the air and she turned into a bad boy,

"Hey girl, this Truth or Dare is stopping now"

Remarking it, she broke open the can of Miranda at the face of Jason who was staring at the girl with Rayban glasses namely Dayan, and smirked when it gurgled into his nose leaving him 'What the ----".The entire crew of the backseat laughed, and thankfully, her brain cells helped me get out of the situation earliest as soon as possible. But a girl still had her eyes on me and Alona.

She wasn't pleased by Alona's diversion trick.

I had noticed it.

But I kept silent when I felt her glare choking me.

Those eyes had stared at me for quite some while ever since she asked me to massage her legs harder or turn her on with some nude pictures which I had to download in my home with her tablet, due to her strict mother who refused such illicit behaviors.

She would even ask small favors when we were alone in the bathroom.

"Can I touch your breasts?"

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Eventually, four hours had passed by. The morning sun approached the open binds of the curtains, leaving everyone enjoying the interior rather than the sceneries. Some mountains could be spotted at a distance but otherwise, everything would be in a 'Flash' and you are shutting your eyes again.

It was breakfast time. I clasped Alona's hands while we decided to get down from the bus, and within moments we were in the front of a two-storeyed restaurant, a Chinese hotel which said it would serve anything in Chinese at the front. Being the disciple of a Chinese tutor for a year, I did know the basics. And since Mrs. Isha knew that, she had grabbed my hand, and was walking in front of everyone like a boss.

A old hoarse man with a white beard and dyed black hair walked outside on seeing the big crowd and offered us a welcome by holding his hands together and bowing. When he said, "Namaste', for a moment I read it as something else and returned a big sentence which meant 'We are about one twenty in number, and we need tables often to accommodate everyone". The widened eyes of the oldish man made me grin a little, and the self-esteem turned into a puff of dust when he said in the perfect English accent,

"Please come in, madam with your friends."

Laughter boomed everywhere, leaving me embarrassed and annoyed. Noticing Mrs. Isha chuckling left me biting my lower lip, and I trudged back to where Alona stood at the side, her warm arms clasped around me as she glared at everyone who had played a trick on her bestie. I didn't cry in case it brought me even worse remarks about cowardice and shrunk into remaining sullen throughout brunch.

It was fresh salmon, salad, steak, and grilled chicken. Juices and icecream flavored the air-conditioned ballroom, leaving me to fasten to my seat and eat whatever came my way. 

Jessy sat two tables across me and her eyes were continuously strolling between me and Alona. Being one of the worst mind readers, I felt guilty for having put Alona into this situation and tried to gulp down everything in order to get myself away from puking everything I had consumed.

 And finally, I had ended up overeating two full plates of fried salmon, a plate of steak, and three bowls of salad. My stomach began to gurgle leaving me uncomfortable, my hand felt for my poor tummy which had become tight over time 

I excused myself when the desserts arrived, and even before I had noticed, I was rushing through the verandah with a mouth crying for directions to the bathroom. A man in lungi was smoking puffs of air, his index pointed diagonally which, made me twist and turn my bent body to the direction. When the man raised an eyebrow in my direction and followed me close behind with a sneer, I was too engrossed in gagging that I hadn't noticed his presence.

The toilet was dirty. Towels were thrown over the washbasin and it looked brown and tattered, with peels of banana and other food particles out of some Malayali's throat. It was too uncomfortable to even notice these, that I rushed for the washbasin at the corner just beside the urinary holes. 

They weren't anyone about and finding both men's and women's under one single ceiling made it much more repugnant. Unflushed poop in one, and many used pads full of sticky blood scattered near the drainage sewer pipes left me even more bitter, and I relived myself by throwing everything into a basin.

Gloves were overthrown on it, and my bent back led to pulling out the undigested bolus. Salmon in chewy forms with the onions came rushing out, and the more I felt nauseated on gathering myself to look around, the more I puked. 

Vomit's vision made me puke through my nose too, leaving it hot due to the undigested spicy mess inside my abdomen. Satisfied after gurgling my cavity with few cups of water, I washed my face and hands and proceeded to straighten my backbone due to a cramp. Eventually, I noticed the large mirror which spread across the length of the bathroom. 

I could have sworn I looked pretty enough. My hair was in a bun after Alona forced me her hands to decorate it with clips, and star pins. My face looked tired after the journey and even sick with pimples popping out in clusters on my forehead, the remaining of the pale skin shining. The hoodie remained as it is, with the green symbol of 'Yo-Yo yo!' falling off a little. The pants were satin and black, just as how they were when I left home. And minutes later, I felt bad for having called myself pretty. 

Pain. Misery. Recollections. 

He was all upon me, his hip muscles flexing like anything with the energy of an ox. Just as I had gasped as the mirror showed me reflections of his desire, his arms wrapped around me from behind, blocking my view of the world and all I could sense was those thick wrinkled hands making way to the buttons of my pants. I couldn't fight back, for this wasn't the first time.

He dragged me to someplace which stunk less, and there he was undressing me like I was his s*x toy. Meant to be his. I couldn't face him even when he turned my head to his face, to force a lip contact. I didn't respond instead stood still like a girl meant to be used. Meant to be this. The smell of smoke was too much on him, leaving me half-conscious. 

His lungi was still on but his huge shoulders with the hanging chests crashed against my bra, as he moaned in pleasure. I grunted when he removed his lungi and whipped me around. I held the walls of the toilet in fear of fainting when some sounds of men from outside popped up. My eyes opened up in hopes and I turned to face him, to find him locking the door and mouthing,

'If you scream, I will be very harsh"

I swigged. He pushed me to the wall and began to crave my neck, my breasts, and eventually my panties. His lungi was thrown away and he was flexing hard. Harder and harder. I held on to his shoulders, shutting my eyes in frustration. In pain. In guilt. In agitation.

 I held on as the pain spread to every part. My big thighs. My long legs. My white neck. My ears. I felt even miserable when I felt something hard crashing against me, my hips clashing the wall with great force, and those moans he made out without any regret.

He stopped midway when my arms reached to my hair, and he whispered,

'Why is there no blood?"

I said nothing and his wanting resumed after his sneer,

'Ooh! Seems like you are a daily toy"

Nightmares came floating back when I shut my eyes, forcefully.

"Please don't-t-t...I ....I.....Please-e-e-e', pleadings poured out but he possessed no time. He had had enough. The ceiling fan rotated and the laboratory possessed the dirty odor of chemicals and diluted acids. It bore him no seconds to rip away my skirt and get himself into my thirteen years old developing genital area which I explored embarrassingly in the toilets.

 He was destroying it, and my fingers were constrained in his grip to avoid my revolts. For a minute, I was praying for some savior to pop up out of nowhere and smash this senior who was groaning and grunting as he pushed harder, along with his foolish friends who were turning themselves on with this exercise of witnessing.

Witnessing a small fragile girl of dreams getting devastated.

Witnessing her confidence level shrink to a zero in just two minutes.

Witnessing her turn into a beast who searched for a blade.

"Where were you?', her voice came resonating inside my ear. I flinched when her arm swung over my shoulder, leaving her shocked but she held me so, and minutes later, we were gathering ourselves into the bus after a good breakfast, like how the teachers mentioned it by caressing their tummies.

 My eyes were searching around for the man in the red lungi. He stood a few feet away, his legs crossed while he sat on a chair beside the ice cream cooler, sipping vanilla. 

For a minute, he smiled at me.

A wicked smile that thanked me for the fun I had gifted.

I thought over why I had allowed him to take a photo of me and him, naked as he pushed himself into me, with more ferocity and more lust. My hair pulled back by my hands and my armpits exposed with greasy hair, and those eyes full of tears. The eyes that yearned for freedom

And just as Alona handed me a butterscotch cone which she had kept for me, I noticed him accompanied by a few other people.

His wife and two children, who were cuddling their father's back when, the wife was busy paying the counterman money from her hubby's pocket, while he tickled the small five-year-olds who felt like they were on the top of the world

The wife noticed my stare when she turned around to lift the younger one and she offered a grin,

Her smile made me cry.

And those tears had been discerned by someone.