Randy stared at the bottle of Crown Royal on the counter, still not entirely convinced he was going to bring it over. It was a good one, at least that’s what the salesman had told him. Whiskey of any kind, least of all the Canadian variety, had never been Randy’s choice of beverage, so he’d had to take the man’s word on it. The bottle was nice, shaped in what took Randy too long to realize was supposed to be a crown-like design, and amber liquid winked through the cut glass and created interesting patterns on the kitchen counter. A yellow jug of extended life antifreeze (A.K.A coolant) sat beside it, boasting a patented formula that guaranteed to be dependable, durable, and performance-enhancing in all types of extreme weather. It was also a good one. The teenager behind the counter at the
