Lost in Arcadia

Fated/True

It was Friday morning when Kade unexpectedly landed himself a job. Before heading back to the city to go to work, Addie sent her brother the passcodes to her apartment building’s electronic locks.

“You can stay with me until you get your own place,” she said.

Kade made a face. “Ew.” He got a whack at the back of the head for his trouble.

“Then suit yourself if you’d rather drive four hours back and forth every day!”

“All right, geez, I was only joking. You really got no chill, sis.”

Addie ignored that and glared at him. “And you’re not allowed to bring home random people, do you understand?”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, I got it,” Kade said carelessly as he draped an arm over Addie’s shoulders and herded her to the front door. “Just go already or you’ll be late.”

Addie grumbled, “I already am late. Make sure to clean yourself up before reporting to work.”

Kade reached up to touch the coarse ends of his hair. “Yeah…” he said with a sigh of regret. “I’d need to do that for Ren’s wedding anyway.”

“That famous friend of yours?” Addie asked as the two were crossing the garden path to reach the wooden gate. “So he and his mate are finally getting married, huh?”

“Mhm,” Kade answered quietly. “Isn’t it nice?”

Addie smiled, and there was a wistful quality in her voice when she replied, “Love matches are always nice, regardless of the pair’s genders.”

“Ooh, what’s this~?” said Kade teasingly. “Is that what you’re after? A ‘love match’? You see, there’s this guy I know—”

“Shut up.” Addie shrugged off Kade’s arm and huffily opened the low gate to get to her car. 

Chuckling, Kade closed it after her and braced his hands leisurely against it.

He told her escaping back, “You better get a move on with that, sis. Love matches don’t usually just land on people’s laps, you know? The rest of us have to go out there and look for it.”

“Oh, you mean like you’ve been doing?” Addie snapped back as she opened the door to her car. “Talk to me once you’ve succeeded with that!”

After giving her brother that critical hit, Addie slammed the car door shut and lost no more time driving off.

“…Ouch.” 

Kade pretended to rub his aching chest while watching Addie’s car disappear down the winding tree-lined street.

She was right, of course. Thus far, his methods were proving to be no better than his sister’s complete inaction.

He was sure about one thing, though.

In this matter, doing something was still better than doing nothing. Even if his chance of succeeding was only 1%, at least it wasn’t zero.

“Okay, Boss,” he muttered to himself as he headed back inside. “Let me get back to you on that.”

…

While fiddling with his phone, Kade was lounging on the couch under the window, a thick mudpack covering his entire face. His father nearly missed a step coming down the stairs when he saw him.

As he approached, Mr. Harker touched his lined chin. “Should I try using that too? I’m starting to look like a cradle robber when I go out with your mom…”

Kade laughed as he sat up. “There’s nothing wrong with how you look, Dad. You’re still as dashing as ever.”

“Really?” Mr. Harker replied, sounding pleased. “Well… I do try to keep fit, at least.”

“But~” Kade continued, “there’s also nothing wrong with trying to maintain your looks~”

When Mrs. Harker found the father and son sometime later, both had matching mudpacks on and were sitting relaxedly on the sofa with their feet up.

“Goodness, is this a thing now?”

The corners of Mr. Harker’s eyes crinkled. “Forgive me, darling. I only want to keep being worthy of your beauty.”

“Oh my…” said Mrs. Harker, her fair cheeks blushing a little. “Just what is this old man saying?”

Feeling amused and icky at the same, Kade rolled his eyes and complained, “Get a room, you two.”

His father turned to him. “As much as I love you, my boy,” he said placidly, “it’s you who need to get a place of your own. Then your mother and I can return to enjoying this whole house, just the two of us.”

Mrs. Harker blushed even more and playfully admonished, “Honey!”

The whole exchange sent Kade rising to his feet. “Okay, that’s enough TMI for today. Are you guys going out again? ‘Cause if not, I’m borrowing the car.”

Mr. Harker got up as well. “No need,” he said as the two began heading back up the stairs. “Just use your own. I’ll drive you to where we’ve kept it.”

After they washed off the mudpack from their faces and Kade also had his father apply some moisturizer, the two fresh-faced men boarded the family car and drove to the nearest farm they owned, where a worker in charge of the farm equipment had also been tasked with the maintenance of Kade’s car.

“Thanks, Dad,” Kade suddenly said, breaking the companionable silence in the car.

Mr. Harker smiled confusedly at him before facing the road again. “It’s not a big deal,” he replied. “Maybe I just really want to get you out of the house. I can’t wait for your mom to feel my face—it’s so nice and smooth.”

As his father ran a palm happily over his own cheek, Kade held back a groan and continued, “I meant about keeping my car for me. I just assumed you sold it already or something.”

Mr. Harker frowned outright as he threw another glance at Kade. “Now why would we do that?” he asked, beginning to feel worried. “What’s going on, Arcadia? You’ve been acting strange since this morning.” Before Kade could reply dismissively again, his father continued, “And don’t say it’s nothing this time. Something is clearly bothering you.”

Kade hesitated for a while before hedging, “Did you or Mom ever go through a midlife crisis?”

Mr. Harker blinked as he thought about the question seriously. “I can’t say that we have…” he then answered. “Unless you counted the usual things people our age go through, like our children leaving the nest or our elder family members dying. But we get through it like we always have. Together.”

A small and wistful smile appeared on Kade’s face. “I used to take it for granted, you know—how warm and loving you and Mom are, not just to us but to each other. I thought the kind of relationship you have was the norm. That other children with bad parents were just unlucky.” He shook his head. “Turns out it’s mostly the other way around. It’s actually me and Addie who hit the jackpot.”

Mr. Harker felt warmed and saddened at the same time. “You must have seen a lot while you were out in the world,” he commented, beginning to understand.

Kade sighed heavily and leaned his head against the car seat. “Yeah…”

“…Did it make you doubt if you were worthy of your good fortune?”

Kade was quiet as he hesitated again. Then he said, “Sorry, Dad. You and Mom only did your best for us. I’m not ungrateful.”

“I know, son,” Mr. Harker replied. “I’ll never think that. And as far as we are concerned, you are worthy. It’s never the child’s choice to be born, so it’s up to the ones who brought them into this world to give them a good life. You have no reason to feel undeserving just because other parents fail to look at it the same way.”

His eyes stinging, Kade had trouble speaking again due to how his throat had constricted.

“I just…” he began with difficulty. “I can’t help but think I should be more. With everything that’s been handed to me, I shouldn’t be so… so…”

‘So useless,’ he finished privately, not wanting his father to hear him say it.

When Kade didn’t continue, Mr. Harker sighed in sympathy. A part of him felt responsible for his son’s present unhappiness.

“You have so many years ahead of you, Arcadia,” he counseled. “I count it as a good thing that you want to become more than you are now. I wish you wouldn’t beat yourself up over it. As trite as it may sound, your mother and I really only want you and your sister to be happy. We never wanted to put any undue pressure on you both, but that seems to have backfired.” 

He sighed again. “I believe it’s because of the example we’ve set that Paradis doesn’t want to settle for a relationship she deems less than perfect. But the truth is… your mother and I merely struck gold as well. We met and discovered we shared many of the same values, and we were both willing to adjust to each other’s differences.”

Mr. Harker briefly turned to Kade and smiled. “Neither of us actually expected to fall in love, you know? We were both aware of the realities of alpha marriages. At the start, we only wanted to make the best of our circumstances, but then…” His smile softened as he stared ahead. “Well, the rest happened. I like to think your mother and I made each other an even better person as we went along, and now here we all are.”

At this point, they reached a turn onto an unpaved road, and Mr. Harker took it before pulling the car up to the side. He then turned to Kade and patted his head.

“Correct me if I’m wrong,” Mr. Harker said to him gently, “but this is also your reason for wanting to find your fated mate, isn’t it?”

Kade looked down at his lap and didn’t answer.

Mr. Harker continued, “You’ve seen from your friends how seemingly easy it is for fated pairs to form a connection—how seamlessly they could go from being strangers one second to being madly in love the next.” He gave his son a sad and serious look. “Are you perhaps thinking this is the only way for anyone to come to love you?”

Unable to control it, Kade’s face contorted as his emotions overcame him. 

His father had hit the nail on the head. 

Ever since he got rejected by Ren in favor of the alpha who was destined for him, a seed had been planted in Kade’s heart—one that told him as it sprouted: he wasn’t worthy of that kind of love. He had been a coward who treated even his own feelings lightly. He had had Ren within his reach for so long, but he didn’t do anything to grasp his chance before it was too late.

Of course he wouldn’t be chosen. Anyone would prefer a person who stayed loyal to them, despite the various difficulties that had been in their way.

Even now, Kade still couldn’t free himself from the habit of being with just anyone. He believed the only person who could reform him was the omega who was meant to be his. The one whose instincts would leave them no choice but to love and accept everything about him.

He didn’t know how else he could receive those things otherwise. Who would really want an immature brat like him if they could help it?

“Oh, son…”

While Kade didn’t cry, his eyes had reddened. He felt his father caress the back of his head before placing a comforting hand on his shoulder.

The older man said, “I had hoped that if my relationship with your mom could teach you and Paradis anything, it’s that anyone can find love with the right person. It doesn’t have to be fated for it to be true. To us, no matter what gender you two end up with, it's more than enough as long as you’re happy with them.” Still looking torn, Kade turned to meet his father’s eyes. Mr. Harker smiled. “I wish you can also come to see it that way, Arcadia.”