CHAPTER 11
So Jake thinks I haven’t cried, but he didn’t see me that afternoon. You remember I told you about that scream after the delivery when I thought my baby was dead? This was different. This was completely silent. Natalie was in her own room, but there were glass windows all around, and the HUC hadn’t shut us in or anything, and I didn’t have the energy to close the door.
I didn’t even know if I was allowed to close the door. I knew my nurse would be bustling in any minute (have you ever known a hospital nurse who doesn’t bustle?), and I didn’t want her to catch me in the middle of my hysterics.
So I cried, but it was totally soundless. I read this thing online, how some scientist once put tears under a microscope and found that there are like a dozen kinds. I mean, I guess we a
