The Seelie Queen

~The Past~ The little girl shivered, pulling the wide blanket closer to her tiny body, wishing she had taken the extra minute to grab more to wear. It was cold, but even still she had wanted to go. Every year, twice a year. She had discovered this secret by accident last year, when she was but four years old, following her mother. The little girl had a nightmare and wanted to find her mother, only to watch her running out the door. She followed her, confused. The little girl knew her mother was different from the others, and that sometimes she’d close her good eye and start giggling, and the little girl loved it when she did. She’d giggle with her mother, hug her close and dance with her. The little girl heard a noise behind her and turned, startled, but was elated to see no one was there. She let out a breath of relief, sighing as she continued on the path. She was only five this year, and she knew she’d be in trouble for being out right now. It was, after all, minutes away from midnight. She shivered again, running silently through the streets, keeping to the alleys and away from the main area. It was still fairly early in the night, and while all of the children were expected to be in bed, tucked away and safe, the sounds from the main square were booming; the celebrations were wild. The prince was born today, after all, and the kingdom was still celebrating the news of the Heir, elated that he was born and would continue the legacy of the nicest and sweetest rulers of all time. Of course, the young girl didn’t understand much of this, but she did get to meet the young prince earlier this day and she was happy to see him all the same. She loved Aislyn and Jem, even if she was confused as to what to call them at times. Jem was her father’s adopted son, so technically he was her older brother, but her mother would say Aislyn was like a sister to her, so that would make Aislyn her aunt. All in all, she ended up calling them Aislyn and Jem, and no one seemed to care one way or the other. She could hear the drunken merriment in the streets as she ran in between the houses, barefoot, her white hair blowing behind her as she ran. It was long, to the middle of her back now, long and straight like her father's. She loved her hair, even if it was a strange color, the color she only saw on older people, she still loved it. Pure white, like the snow, her favorite season. The little girl shivered again, running, happy when she finally came to the edge of the houses. There were sentries in the woods, keeping watch, but now where she was going. The hill, the magical hill. It was the spot Queen Aislyn and King Jeremiah were married at. The girl finally arrived, taking deep breaths as she shivered once more, pulling the blanket around her tiny shoulders. There was a rose bush there, that was said to have magically appeared after the wedding was over. Aislyn had sworn she didn’t do it, and it became just that much more magical, as if the earth itself blessed their wedding, their union, their love. The girl sat down at the hill, next to the sleeping bush, scooting close to it for cover and to block the ice-cold wind from her body. It was too cold to bloom now, but during the summer, it was beautiful. The girl watched from her spot on the hill as her mother let out a soft giggle. From on top of the hill, the girl could see everything. If she looked behind her, she could see the kingdom, the houses all built of different shapes and sizes, different structures that somehow blended together beautifully. But from the direction she was facing, she could see a lot of things. Down below was the flat surface that held the monthly weddings. Sometimes it skipped a month if there wasn’t a couple wanting to be married that month, but it didn’t ever skip longer than two months. There were always weddings at the end of the months, and the whole kingdom would gather in the clearing, the awnings standing straight and the crowd watching as the brides walked down the aisle to their grooms. It was a beautiful tradition, and the little girl loved it dearly. She could see the cliffs overlooking the sea to the left, and if she listened well enough she could hear the sound of the seagulls bellowing their calls. The little girl’s mother was wearing a beautiful green cloak, it rippled like water on her as she lifted her hands in the air and started to dance. She wore a garland on her head, always made fresh the day before. The girl learned, after that first time she discovered her mother, that her mother did this every full moon, and it was expected of her. A fairy trait, her father had said with a shrug. She didn’t understand then, but she was wise enough in her young age to know she would one day when she was older, and for now she just simply watched mother dance. Her feet were bare as she danced, soaking in the light of the moon. It was magical, and she was glad she had made it just in time for the dancers. They appeared all at once, as if they were waiting to come together, to make the entrance. They flocked around her mother, giving her kisses on the cheeks, handing her bouquets of flowers, placing flowers in her hair, and dancing with her. It was beautiful, watching them. She had followed her mother many times before, but only two times of the year the other fairies came out to dance with her. Summer Solstice, and Winter Solstice. She didn’t understand this at the time, but the veil between the human world and the fairy realm was thinnest at those times, and the fairies could stay tangent in the human world for longer than usual. Long enough to visit their princess, and to soak in the moonlight. The first night the girl saw this, she sat transfixed, watching with wide eyes. The beauty of their dance, the fluidity of their motions, it was mesmerizing, and she could feel it in her if she closed her eyes. The inner beat, the dance of the fairies, the music that flowed through them, through her. It was there, if she concentrated long enough, she could hear it rushing through her veins, pulsing through her, begging her to join. She was shy, and she promised herself she’d do it next time. But the next time came and she was scared, wondering if she would be scolded. Surely she wasn’t allowed, since she was so young? She saw kids her age down there, but surely their parents allowed them to join in. She was tucked in every night, so--the girl reasoned with herself--if her mother wanted her to join, she would have taken her with her, right? But tonight, she was determined tonight. This would be the night, the night that she worked up the courage and joined her. She closed her eyes, feeling the music inside of her, the beat that flowed through all fairies, the beat that connected them all as one. They didn’t need music, they were music. She lifted her head back, closed her eyes, feeling the beat. She had the blanket still wrapped around her but she stood, not feeling the cold anymore. Something about the music, it was enough to warm her, as if it was warming every part of her, encouraging her, welcoming her to the dance. She swayed, the blanket falling to the ground as she slowly walked down the hill. She was hesitant, scared, but the closer she got the more drawn to them she felt. It was right, this feeling. The feeling of belonging. She paused for only a moment, before diving into the throngs of the others, dancing with the rest of them. She was clumsy, awkward, not as graceful as the others, but no one mocked her. It was just the opposite, honestly. As if sensing she was of royal blood, the others surrounded her, placing freshly strung garland on her head, running their fingers through her long hair, touching her. So many fairies wanted a chance to touch her, to slide their finger down her cheek or run a nail through her hair, as if claiming a part of her, a part of her essence. She was one with them all, joined in this dance, in the music. The music that only they could hear, as they danced under the moon. It was then, that she saw him. It was by accident, really. She had been flowing along with the music, her eyes closed mostly, but she threw her head back, her hair raining down her back, and when she went to lower her head again, her arms in the air as she danced, she saw him. She froze, standing in the middle of the others, and none of them seemed to notice her pause, lost as they were in the music. She wasn’t sure why the sight of him pulled at her, but she started dancing again, losing sight of him. She was, after all, only five, she was shorter than the others and the adults were everywhere, dancing all around her, blocking her view. She saw him though, her eyes staying wide opened, as she slowly danced through the fairies, across the clearing, to the cliffs. He was all alone, standing there, staring at her. She couldn’t see much of him, as she finally got through the crowd. The little girl wasn’t dancing anymore, she was standing there, inches away from the boy, staring at him unabashed as he looked down at the ground. Even still, she had seen it, before she even made her way over to him. His eyes, they were startling, because of the color. Icy blue, so light, it was almost white, reflecting against the shine of the moon. He had a black cloak over him, the hood covering his hair, but even still she knew he was a boy. He seemed older than her, maybe around eight, or nine, but she wasn’t certain, since she couldn’t see his face or his body very well. Just his eyes, his beautiful eyes, that were shining with so much pain and sadness that her heart broke for him. She realized, as she stared at this boy, that even as he was ignoring her, she was feeling his pain. Tears ran down her cheeks, and after a while she let out a sob, making him look up at her in surprise. “Why are you crying?” He asked the girl softly. She gasped, for the depth of the sadness in his voice, it was overwhelming, and she couldn’t fully contain her heartbreak. “Why not dance with us? Join us? Will you dance with me?” She asked him, boldly holding out her hand. He frowned, shaking his head, then pulled his hood farther over his face, covering it. She was stubborn though, and refused to back down. After all, he was a fairy, right? He would be much happier if he was dancing with the others. If only he’d dance, maybe he’d smile. She wanted dearly to see him smile. “What’s your name?” She asked him, hoping to make him open up to her, if only for a moment. He frowned, stepping backward, his foot on the ledge of the cliff. He stared at her, his eyes wide, fear in them. She could see how pale he was, how panicked he was, as his chest rose and dropped rapidly, fear coursing through him. “My name? What?” He whispered, fear in his voice. His hands lifted to his face, and the girl was confused, because it seemed to her that he...didn’t know his name. “My name, is Nothing.” He whispered, a sob in his voice. The girl felt the tears on her cheeks again, her heart breaking for his pain, for his confusion. Finally, she stepped forward, her hand in the air, ready to touch him. She wanted to calm him, to tell him it would be alright. After all, when she was upset, her mother or father would hold her. It seemed natural for her to want to hold him, hug him close to her, and tell him it would be alright. Only, he didn’t seem to want that from her. He flinched, fear in his eyes, and for a moment she wondered if he was afraid of a raised hand, afraid she would hurt him, instead of help. This strange boy, this mystery, it was baffling. He stepped back again, only this time there was no more land there, and the boy fell backward into the sea. The girl gasped, seeing the shock in the boy's eyes as he fell backward, and without thinking she jumped after him, her only thought was to save him. She wrapped her arms around him, and the last thing she felt before they fell to the rocks below, was his arms holding her close in an embrace, his body shifting so he was underneath her. After that, she felt nothing. The world went dark, and she was gone. The cliffs were dangerous, and she knew she wasn’t allowed to be near them. Every year a number of boys would go to them, daring each other to jump, and sometimes a little boy’s body would be found, dead, discolored, and bloated on the shore. The little girl awoke to her mother screaming her name, the sun shining in her eyes. Her father and her twin brother were behind her mother, tears in everyone’s eyes. They were sobbing for her, clutching her close to them, all four of them hugging. The little girl was silent, tears in her own eyes, but she was staring to the side through the arms of those who loved her, embracing her, staring at the group of men gathered around the body. She couldn’t see much, but she heard what they said as they wrapped the body in cloth, securing it. A boy, they whispered. He was but a boy, they said. He was dead, taken early: by the sea. After that, the girl didn’t leave her house for months, missing the funeral even though Queen Aislyn healed her. She didn’t follow her mother again. She was heartbroken, for the boy whose name was Nothing. The boy she wanted so desperately to save, but only ended up killing him.