Addicted to their Love

Chapter 10 Greyson

Greyson's p.o.v.

I sighed, finally finishing my food. Who knows eating with fock could be this hard...I drink water and wiped my mouth with 'tissue' instead of my hand or sleeves. What difference does it make anyway...my sleeves might have done better work than these tiny tissues.

And now, I think I am being an asshole by getting irritated by every little thing. But again, I am not complaining to anyone, just thinking inside my mind.

From the outside, I might have looked like a mute large alpha. But from inside...inside I'm f*****g mess. A mess no one can ever clean.

Mother caressed my head lovingly, putting a glass bottle and some glasses in front of me, she again crouched beside me. I just looked between her and the bottle. What's this again...She raised her brow as if realized my confusion

" So...do you like white wine?"

Oh, white wine...I smiled. But still have no f*****g idea what the f**k this is, it smelled good though...as long as it tastes good I am fine. If...it even uses for drinking, who knows they might use it for washing their hand...or for their face...or other things.

When things like this happen I wish I could just get my memories back...but I am too f*****g cowardly to remember my own past.

I sighed when Ethan poured that drink into a glass and give it to me. I didn't drink it and waited until they took a sip. So, white wine is used for drinks after all...I smiled, I learned another new thing.

Still, with that same smile, I picked up my glass and drink it in one go...A sigh escaped my lips, it...it taste delicious. If they'll give me this every day maybe I'll decide to eat more dinners with them instead of going hunting in the woods.

Ethan laughed when mother poured me another glass of white wine and without wasting a blink, I drink it one go and put the glass back. My eyes darted at their amazed faces and then to their glasses. They still hadn't drunk their first glass. Maybe I can help them...I don't mind drinking theirs too.

" You want more Alpha?", Ethan asked, chuckling and giving me another glass.

And here goes my happy mood in the gutter. How many times I had said that I. Am. Not. Their. Alpha. But he and others just don't understand and keep calling me Alpha as if I am their owner.

They even did that weird bonding ritual and now every pack member can also do that mind-link s**t with me; talking without speaking. As if kidnapping me wasn't enough that now they want to live inside my mind too!

Fuck, I just realized I am kidnapped by my own mother and pack...

" Alpha?", Ethan nudged my shoulder making me growl, " Don't call me that...", I snapped and he shifted abruptly, scared by my alpha voice. I didn't use it purposely though. It came out on its own.

Taking a deep breath, I looked down at my fisted knuckles on the table, feeling guilty. The day I came back here, Ethan was nothing but kind to me and I scared him like that.

Sighing, I shifted my gaze at his still nervous brown eyes, peering up at me, " I didn't...", I started but stopped as I heard a voice inside my brain.

" Don't Greyson...", Mother interrupted, without even speaking, using our mind link.

Look, that's what I was saying... I am their Alpha, so I have this weird power over all of them; I can command them and they will do whatever I want, I can feel what they feel, I can know what they are thinking, I can talk to them or listen to them without using voice, just with brain.

I am their Alpha, a leader of a most dangerous pack with hundreds of werewolves under my command. They look up to me, and I am nothing but an embarrassment to them all. They stared at me as if I am some weird god. They gave me a power I don't want, at least not now.

Anyway, I am starting to think this is not a power, this is weakness, my weakness.

I again looked at Ethan, ready to tell him this all but my mother already guessed it, and again interrupted me by nudging her high heels at my legs. It f*****g hurts, these heels should be a weapon.

My eyes stared back at those amber eyes which used to be filled with love years ago. She stared back at me, her eyes showing emotions I never remember seeing in them. Frustration.

" Don't think of saying that again. You are their Alpha whether you want or not."

She said with our mind link, and I could do nothing but deny again. I already knew she won't believe it but I said it anyway.

" but I didn't kill him, mother...", I replied inside her mind, looking into her dark eyes, her face softened a bit but her eyes...they are still dead.

" no one is blaming you, he was an awful man..."

But I didn't kill him, I thought as I looked away. I wanted to kill him, I really did. I even wish I had killed him...but I didn't. And no one f*****g believes it. And why would they, I hated my father everyone knew it.

The little memory I have...those haunted nights, those screams... I could still feel those burn masks Dad had given me. Everything is so painful that I am scared to know more. I purposely don't want to recall my memories, scared that I'll remember something I did hard to forget.

" Alpha?", Ethan touched my shoulder, snapping me out of my thoughts.

" hmm?", I hummed, still staring at the empty glass.

" you were saying something?"

I wanted to tell him everything, about those dark men, and that I didn't kill my dad... even though I already said that before but that time he thought I was scared because of trials. Killing any wolf without an official challenge is against shifters' law. So he and everyone thought I was lying, trying to get away from trails.

And when they declared me Alpha of this white shadow pack and I don't know how, but I also get away from shifter trails...My mother didn't let me tell anyone that again, saying it didn't matter after dad's death I would have eventually become Alpha anyway.

She just doesn't understand, I don't want to be falsely accused of a crime I never commit. But f**k, who cares what I think or want, right.

" What is it, you can tell me, you know that right.", Ethan said again, softly caressing my muscles. They all treated me like a f*****g kid. Maybe I acted like one that's why...

Shaking my head, I pour another glass of white wine for myself. " nothing.", I mumbled, sipping it slowly this time, just like mother and Ethan were doing.

As I drank that delicious fluid, Ethan told me about his meeting with the Black Moon pack's Alpha. I knew who he was talking about, Uncle Johnson. But I decided to ignore it, don't want to talk about that pack...or her.

" So what do you think about this?", Ethan asked, shaking my hand when I didn't reply.

Honestly, I don't even know what they were talking about. I was lost...lost in her memories. I really missed watching her...but this is better as staying away from her was getting harder now.

I don't know how much I could control myself, even her smell was making me insane...when she was a kid, it was easier but as she grew up...fuck, I don't even want to think about that. I am f*****g sick.

" Greyson, were you even listening to us?", Mother nudged me, and I just nodded my head.

" So, tell us what do you think about that?"

" About what? ", I asked, looking between mother and Ethan.

She shook her head at my lack of awareness, " Living with Mr. Johnson.", She said...and I felt as if the ground beneath me had vanished. Seriously, why don't they just kill me!

I rubbed a palm in my face, laughing humorously as I stared back at them, both watching me as if I grew two heads over my neck. I raised my brow, " You mean living with my seventeen-year-old mate...", I said with gritted teeth, biting my tongue, don't want to blurt out what was going inside my mind right now.

They want me to live with Uncle Johnsson...knowing my mate will be there too, my teenage underage mate.

Whom I can't stop thinking about...whom I can't stop wanting after turning into my human form...whom I yearned to touch, hold, kiss...rip her clothes apart and claim on her knees over that dirty filthy mud of the forest.

Whom I supposed to reject after three months...