The Alpha's Mate--Cursed Heart

Conflicted

Episode Four—Conflicted

Marcus POV:

Daggers pierced through my heart as my chest heaved under the weight of despair as Moriah’s eyes left mine. 

I was caught off guard by her first subtle glance towards the balcony and my presence. My wolf was eager and excited.  I hadn’t been able to force myself to move from my spot since Vincent reluctantly left me to join them all below.  However, the only one that held me cemented in place mesmerized was the object of my every want and desire in this world…Moriah.  

I ignored the fact that I had left myself open to be discovered by Alec as I stared at my love allowing my senses to take in every detail of her while my eyes imprinted each of those details into my memory to remain there for eternity.   Every angelic curl of her lip, melodious laugh, delicate touch of a rose by slender petite fingers, sideways expression of contentment as she took in the fragrant scents, every ounce of movement and facial countenance was placed in its new home of my enamored heart and mind. 

I could feel Vincent look up at me several times during their walk and I did my best to attempt to heed their warning of retreat, failing miserably every time.  I could not move, not even an inch if it meant I could no longer see my Moriah.  I knew he was concerned Alec would see me and sense my intensity towards his sister.  I had chosen my spot carefully, however, right beside a large cement planter that gave me my best opportunity at the slightest concealment. 

And then it happened…as Vincent and Katelyn made their way back towards the balcony, Moriah looked towards Alec and then remarkably turned to look up at me.  My whole body shook with delight when our eyes met one another.  My wolf was ready to pounce, claim, and devour.  I had been working so diligently to build my memories of her in the garden that my expression must have caused her alarm as she retrieved her gaze and directed it towards some roses beside her.  The overwhelming pain that slight movement caused was immeasurable causing my legs to feel as if they were going to buckle under its density.  My wolf howled miserably at her denial of further attention.

It was then that I noticed the slightest shift in Moriah’s stance alerting both my wolf and I as her expression fell into a mild grimace for just a millisecond before she recovered back to a look of sweet contemplation.  So vague that most would have missed it, but we did not.  Frantic worry and guilt ensued.  Was she alright?  Was she in pain?  Was it my fault?  Did my intense stare hurt her?  The last thought ate away at me.   If my Moriah was suffering in pain because of me, I didn’t know if I could survive that shame. 

I wanted to rush down and take her in my arms to comfort her.  Kiss those voluptuous lips until we were both breathless and making whatever pain she was experiencing disappear forever.  I wanted that so badly!  But that was an impossible wish, as Alec was standing with Lafayette not far from her and Moriah did not appear to feel any sort of connection to me whatsoever—a devastating realization. 

I saw Moriah look over at Alec and Lafayette again before her eyes turned back towards mine to my bewilderment.  I anxiously searched the depths of them for any inkling of her discomfort before proceeding to look for any ounce of feeling towards me that would account for her unexpected attention.  My search proved futile though, as I felt the deep blue orbs reach out to perform their own intense hunt of my inner self.  My wolf’s excited howl returned and echoed loudly inside me. 

All my breath left my body as my heart burst with elation and hope.  Could she finally feel our inseparable bond?  Please, oh PLEASE let it be!

Just as swiftly as my heart was sent sailing, the daggers appeared and slammed me back onto the ground, despair filling my whole body before settling into my lungs making it harder and harder to breathe.  Her eyes purposefully tore away from me back towards the ground before they betrayed me further by returning to Alec as she turned her back towards me to repeat her actions from earlier and walked to his side.    

Everything in me—including my wolf—felt as if it were rapidly coming unglued as I fought with myself to find the calm in this torrential storm. 

Thankfully, it was then that I felt the support of a warm slender hand wrap itself around my bicep.  “I know my request is difficult, but please, Marcus, let me take you away from this torture.  At least for now.  Please, for me…”

I managed to turn my rigid pained body towards the voice to find Katelyn looking back at me tenderly with tears clinging to the corners of her beautiful green eyes.  She increased the intensity her supportive grasp of my arm.  “We will work this out, I promise.  You, me, and Vincent…together.”

I placed my hand over hers and began to walk towards the entryway where Vincent was waiting for us with a grieved expression.  As we reached him, I took Katelyn’s hand and returned it to her husband who gently pulled her into his arms, wrapping his arm around her waist.  Neither of them looking at the other during this exchange as their eyes remained on me.     

I knew how much they fiercely loved and cared about me.  My love for them just as fierce, if not more.  Because of that love, I knew I had a decision to make.  I had to push all of the overwhelming emotions and feelings I was having to the side—at least for now--for them, “I know that I have been completely unfair to you both this evening.  Please forgive me for that.”

Vincent started to protest, but I held up my hand to stop him before he could speak.  “If anyone deserves to be celebrated, it is the two of you and I plan to do just that.  So, please know I will not ruin your evening.  I give you my word that I will not cause any further problems tonight.   We will not speak another word of my current situation until tomorrow.”

One of the tears escaped its captivity from Katelyn’s eye as it slowly rolled down her cheek, “Are you sure you will be alright?”

I smiled lovingly, reaching up to wipe her worries away. “Do not spend any more time or thought on this tonight.  Please, for me…”

As adoring smiles slowly returned to both of their faces, calm resolutely took control of my body pushing me to be a man of my word.  We walked through the doorway together to officially allow the festivities to begin.   I only hoped that I could hold onto the calm and keep my promise.

Moriah POV:

As Alec and I walked into the ballroom, I felt a wave of happiness and ease regain control of my emotional state.  Even my exhaustion seemed to disappear.  There were many guests arriving, but I was not as nervous nor as torn as I was following my arrival and all that had occurred up to this moment.  My mind allowing me a much appreciated reprieve from my conflicting thoughts as excitement filled the room in anticipation of the gala. 

My smile extended further as I took in the elegant ballroom while Alec guided us to our seat towards the front.  Cascading chandeliers glistened under the soft lighting sending tiny sparkles all over the walls and floor giving a beautiful soft glow to the whole room.  The tables lined with fine crisp white linen contrasted by the red wine contained in exquisite crystal with matching glasses that shined as brightly as the chandeliers, laid out in front of intricately designed swirls on the delicate red china.  Each setting perfectly aligned around the circular mahogany tables.  Katelyn’s attention to detail created an atmosphere of delight as beauty was found everywhere one turned.   

As Alec pulled out my chair and I sat down, I looked over at the head table and saw Marcus looking directly at me again, his expression softened but still almost like he was searching my face for answers to something.  Unlike my earlier thoughts, it felt like he was worried about me.  Maybe that is what caused the the twinge of connection earlier.

I have no idea what came over me, but after Alec and Lafayette turned away for a moment to greet an acquaintance, I decided to disobey my brother.  I couldn’t stop this overwhelming need to attempt to reassure Marcus somehow, so I quickly nodded with a warm smile towards him.  It was something so simple, but it seemed to help as he immediately returned my nod and pleasantly smiled before turning his attention to Vincent and Katelyn as they took their seats.  I was caught off guard as I found my whole body completely filled with relief.  I couldn’t understand what was happening.  In my heart, I felt nothing romantic towards Marcus, but I still felt this sudden connection to him—a pull that was growing the more I saw of him.  A pull that I couldn’t explain.

Before I knew it, my mind betrayed my brother once more as I thought to myself that Marcus has a nice smile.  If only there could be more.  To feel love and have a chance at it being returned.  What must that feel like?  Peering at Marcus out the of corner of my eye, I had to admit, he was handsome enough no question.  Deep brown eyes with a glint of caramel in the center. His dark hair and chiseled rugged features along with his tall 6’4 frame detailed by broad shoulders and powerful lines of perfectly sculpted muscles from head to toe that was especially noticeable in his black tuxedo…it should have at least given me a few butterflies, but all I felt was an appreciation of his smile and his kindness in my heart.  So how is it I could be feeling this attachment to him?  And why? 

His smile once more a became focus of my admiration amid swirling reflections.  Even without butterflies or semblance of love in my heart, I found myself feeling a great sense of contentment in it.  It was so incredibly calming to me for reasons I could not begin to explain.  But after the rollercoaster of physical and emotional stressors I had experienced so far, I would gladly take the calm.

As that feeling flowed through me, I quietly let out a slight laugh.  One night out and I was already disobeying my brother hand over foot by not making any attempt to avoid Marcus and then allowing myself to think about him in this way.  Seems I was becoming a rebel!  I had better tread carefully moving forward or my night of freedom could end just as quickly as it began.

******

Alec POV:

As I turned back around to take my seat, I noticed Moriah laugh softly.  “Tell me, dear sister, what have you found to be humorous?”

Moriah looked up at me in chagrin, her eyes dancing happily, “No humor, brother, I’m simply in awe of everything happening around us.”

I scoffed at her reply.  Galas did not hold any awe for me.  In fact, I dreaded and avoided them at all costs unless necessity rendered no other option.  As Vincent was an important pawn in my current chess game, my presence was without a doubt necessary this evening.  However, even my wolf was begging for a reprieve of our surroundings.  A sigh of exasperation expelled from my throat as I replied, “Well, at least you no longer look tired.  Although l cannot for the life of me understand why one would feel the need for something this extravagant.  So many people simply here to feed off one’s prosperity.  Rather disgusting if you ask me.  Which is why there will never be a gala of this nature held in our home.”

My response did not seem to have any effect on Moriah as she beamed from ear to ear, looking around the room taking in all the people milling around.  “I think it is wonderful that so many have come out to celebrate Vincent and Katelyn.  They have obviously invoked the adoration and appreciation of many people from all different walks of life.”

I could not hide the distain in my voice at that thought.  “Too many different walks of life in one room.  Werewolves, witches, vampires, humans…its dangerous.  Having to protect my sister from all this makes it incredibly hard to find any enjoyment if I am to be truthful.  If it weren’t for the agreement with Vincent, we would make our leave now.”

Moriah’s gaze turned back to me, chastising me for my words and surprisingly, for my earlier pleasantries while continuing to display a vibrant grin.  “I would think with your immediate fondness of Katelyn and appreciation of Vincent that you would feel quite happy to celebrate their union.  Everyone here knows of your power and strength, my dear brother, which makes it very hard to believe there is any danger.  I for one feel perfectly safe with you by my side.”

Momentarily taken aback by her words, I fell silent, deciding I would allow Moriah to continue to enjoy her surroundings for a short time longer before I had Lafayette take her home and make my apologies to the happy couple for my own early exit despite her well-intended declaration. 

Watching Moriah, I couldn’t deny that it had been many years since she had expressed that much glee.  Granted, it was at my hand, but as I look at her now, she really is quite beautiful.  It was a pity I had no choice but to make her suffer.  Life could be quite unfair, I suppose.  Especially to those as special as Moriah.  But, I needed her to suffer to fulfill my own gain.  A destiny bestowed upon me by my beloved father that I was determined would come to fruition.

Proving my sister’s proclamation was true with regards to our host, I allowed my attention to find its way to Katelyn as she held onto Vincent’s arm tightly mingling with some of their guests at the table at the head of the hall.  I wasn’t lying when I said that Vincent was a fortunate man.  His wife—his mate—was breathtaking.  The light wisps of hair flowing around her beautiful face with heart piercing green eyes and lips that one could spend many a night dreaming of sucking before moving down to worship the perfectly sculpted curves of her desirous body.   She was a sight to behold as my tongue instinctively moved across my lips in admiration.  Oh, what I would love to do to and with that exquisite creature!

While my mate, Lexi, was my eternal partner, I made room for many mistresses to fulfill desires that Lexi was unable to quench.  None remained for too long, so as not to arise suspicion, but there were a few special exceptions to that rule.   

The stiffening of my manhood was halted when the couple leaned in and Marcus came into view.  I was still unsettled from his encounter with Moriah.  I caught his scent earlier in the garden.  His distrust of my alliance with Vincent was clear, but I found it difficult to ascertain if his presence was in protection of his best friend or interest in my sister for his use in our rivalry.  This led to my enlisting of Lafayette to contact my current greatest weapon to find the answer. 

Before leaving this morning, I instructed Lexi to have me notified immediately upon the return of Lenore, the powerful witch who was essential to my plans and an exception to many of my rules.  Lenore had left a week earlier in search of special ingredients for Moriah’s next round of medicinal potions and I was anxiously awaiting her return.  Upon Moriah’s arrival for the gala, Lafayette held me back from joining in Vincent’s introduction of Katelyn to tell me that Lexi had confirmed Lenore’s arrival at the castle and that she had already begun preparations of the potions. 

After witnessing Marcus and Moriah’s interaction on the balcony and then Marcus’ scent dispelling over the garden,  I had Lafayette mind link with one of our high ranking guards to locate Lenore and enlist her vision to see what intentions were being set forth.

It didn’t take long before Lafayette completed his mission and returned to me in the garden…

Following me over to the side, Lafayette stated under his breath, “It has been done, sire.  Lenore has confirmed no threat to our Alpha.  Her vision reflected no indication of Marcus utilizing Moriah nor any thoughts of starting a battle with you.  In fact, their interaction appears just as your sister indicated.”

While I was relieved, my instincts pulled at my gut, questioning Lenore’s expertise.  “She is sure?  There were no blank spots in the vision?  No chance of misinterpretation?”

Lafayette decisively returned, “She is positive, sire.  Much like you, she pays attention to all details.  She sensed no misinterpretation.”

For the moment, I decided to accept Lenore’s answer.  Upon my return, I would inquire further with her on my own…alone.  

I redirected Lafayette’s focus back to his responsibilities for the evening.  “Regardless, let’s continue to watch Marcus this evening, shall we?  And no one is to get too close to Moriah, do you understand?  There are many who will be shocked to see her here with me.  We cannot allow anymore contact than is necessary.  It was bad enough to have Marcus meet her.  We cannot take any chances when it comes to her or everything we have worked for all of these years will be destroyed.”

Lafayette nodded vehemently, “Yes.  Agreed.  We will keep her safe this evening.  You have my word.” 

I was pulled away from my thoughts of the conversation in the garden by Marcus, who had taken notice of my stare.   Eyeing me warily, I flashed a smile back in his direction, causing him to look away finally. Marcus was my greatest adversary and opponent in my little game of chess and I had every intention of annihilating him.