His Pretended Fiancee`(spin off of Marriage For Convenience)

Chapter 5

Chapter 5

"Are you crazy? It's freezing out here?" I yelled at Sia as loud music poured from the speakers of an empty water park "its December, month of Christmas and snow fall."

"Thanks for the FYI Sandy" she laughed as she gave herself a glance once over in her one piece swim suit that she so comfortably wore on a freezing okay not so freezing afternoon.

Although its sunny but still its like 10 degrees.

But she doesn't seem to mind.

"Sandy if you crinkle your brows like this, you might get wrinkles soon" she took one quick dive in water with both her hands raised above, her legs straight that she so swiftly raised for a push and plunged into a water like a fish. 

I might die if I do not breath for long...

Damn the girl is sinfully Haaaawwwwwtttt

Seconds later she was out and shouted "Sandy boy come on those wrinkles won't suit the gray locks besides your ears. Jump in"

Gray hair? Am I that old to gray? That was low blow

Especially when I was sensitive about my age and difference between ours.

Like a flash I discarded all my clothes

Don't get your hopes up, I did keep my boxers

And before I could start shivering like a leaf on a windy spring day I sprinted towards the pool and quickly and most ungraceful way jumped into the water.

"God you are soo" Sia was already laughing.

"What have I done now?" I asked bewildered of another harmless blow from her.

She continued laughing as she expressed her views "you jumped like you already dropped your tiny balls into the water and were eager to grab them before they dissolve."

"Where do you get to chose your words from?" I laughed at the insult. "Have you joined certain school that trains you to tease men and defecate their confidence?"

She was shunned silent at my remark and before I could celebrate for finally getting back at her she turned stoic and her face hardened "certain things come with experience" same words and same bitterness that I experienced the day of the inauguration.

Quickly both of us let it pass.

"Wanna try that swirl slide?" I asked and she agreed immediately, her face radiating with happiness that I did not dwell further like last time.

Wasn't that the deal?

No questions asked..

I climbed the stairs cursing myself being the one to propose it in the first place and marched towards the monstrous stride with a tube slung to my arms, the freezing cold biting on my skin as tiny goosebumps erupted allover.

I tried to increase my speed, a little physical effort may fight the cold but accidently I bumped into Sia

"Ooouch" she yelled not because I hurt but she'd dropped her tube into the slide.

We looked dejectedly as the empty tube swirled and moved freely on the blue slides of the ride.

Hands on her hips she glared at me "I did not climb all these stairs in this freezing cold for nothing"

Did she actually feel cold?

Didn't look like when she was admiring herself in the tiny costume?

Well I should be intimidated and I sure was, not because of her furious stance or the accusatory eye stink but standing front of me in a short costume, hands on a perfectly curved hips, her shoulder muscles bulging at places that made heat surge through my body,she looking even hotter if that was even possible, her chest thrusting upwards and downwards as she was breathing hard, tiny goosebumps now kissed her whole body.

The heat that was longed by me rushed through my veins like a wave and that was pretty intimidating.

She then narrowed her eyes at me, did I mention that color of her golden pupils shone in the mid noon sun that was smiling behind the clouds.

"You can have mine" I offered my tube "my apology"

She was taken aback. She expect a fight, some excuse

She eyed greedily between the tube and the ride not wanting to let go either of them, nor did she want me not to miss the fun.

"You sure you don't want to go after climbing that hard" she looked at the series of the stairs that we'd climbed to reach the top.

'Yeah" I made a disappointed face "climbing back down all the way might be boring, but its okay" I showed a positive sign "Also the water is cold." I eyed the water scarily.

"You are such a sissy," she said making me pout.

"I prefer being a charmer young lady and as much as I like your smart mouth, I prefer you save it for better use."

"What?" she almost yelled.

Shit that came out wrong' I mumbled to myself apologetically "Forget what I said. You can carry on with your insulting remarks" I said casually "I might get immune to them one day" I said mocking hurt and then encouraging her "carry on, carry on"

She smiled and I did see a tug of guilt in her but she quickly composed herself "About the ride." She said, "I think this tube is designed to fit two. Why don't you join me? That way we both can enjoy the ride."

"Are you sure?" while I was happily dancing inside.

I don't know why. But may be adrenaline of enjoying the ride

Or enjoying the ride closely with Sia?

Either way I thought of pushing my useless thoughts behind my head and live for the moment.

I comfortably positioned myself on the tube and she scooted behind me.

'Are you okay?" I asked when I felt her shuffling behind me. 

"No" she struggled to find a comfortable position and finally she scooted closer enough for our bodies to stick together.

I took a deep breath passing a small prayer of gratitude that she chose to sit behind me and not the other way, my protruding steel rod would have definitely made the carefree girl uncomfortable.

'I should not enjoy this, I should not' I fruitlessly chanted in my head

I couldn't help but feel comfortable with her arms spread around me as she held the black handles tightly.

I felt little trickles on my back as she giggled with her face bumping my back "can I confess?" she asked loudly, the splashing of water loudly making it difficult to communicate 

I nodded "say"

She shifted a bit before admitting 'we are so high I feel a tad, a little, a tiny ... nervous."

Smiling at her sweet confession simply to sooth her I lied "me too" and with one push I let the tube slide and we both shouted laughing together as we enjoyed the quick strides of the tube left and right, right and left, then the tiny bumps till we reached the part where the slide would simply fall of in one motion into the water.

With a loud shriek we let the tube slip into the water.

Another loud shriek was passed as we gasped at the cold water.

'''''''''''

Few rides later once we were out of the water I smiled and felt relieved at the same time when I heard next words coming Sia's mouth

And drum rolls please

For they were..

"I am freezing now, lets get the hell out of here"

She said pulling up the towel. 

"Come lets take the freezing damsel home," I said in my best possible British accent still making the fool out of me.

But strangely enough there wasn't any series of any smart replies or mock laughter that I had gotten addicted to.

"Even if I was a damsel I need no knight to take me home. I know my route very well" she said curtly "thank you very much"

There was a lot more to this girl than what lies beneath her strong façade' I thought.

"Oh my god look" she said excitedly like a kid looking at the ferries wheel at the yearly fair after a whole decade "ravioli, yummm!!!"

The little feisty girl inside the body of a hulk woman was back and I smiled.

"You like ravioli?" I asked.

"Nopes" she denied "never tasted but have seen a lot of cookery shows teaching to cook them."

'So?" I raised my eyebrow.

'This place is always so crowded" she miffed; "I wanted to taste but never got to, soooo" she finished in a singsang voice making me laugh.

"Come my lady" I faked an accent, which was possibly a combination of British and Jeanie from Aladdin's lamp "Your wish is my command"

She puckered her lower lip and raised her eyebrows in appreciation "impressive" she complimented and I wondered if I normally read people's reaction like I did hers.

"I am so confused." She scanned the laminated single chart menu in her hands "I like cheese but I love olives, then I hate spinach but bell peppers I don't mind." She forwarded the menu towards me "Why don't you choose?"

I was about to pick the menu when she stopped me like I was going to step on a dangerous mine "you are a doc like Pari , I mean like your Angie you might end up taking something healthy like spinach or broccoli yuck!' she made a gagging face "I'll choose for myself"

"Not all doctors are diet and food conscious" I tried to tick off her stereotypes.

"With Pari on my head 24*7 to eat all the healthy stuff and what benefits what like carrots for eyes, kidney beans for lungs, broccoli for cancer blah.. blah.. blah..." she displayed an irritated face "I swear I am never going to marry a doc."

"Ho.. ho.. hold your horses Sia. You know you are prejudicing over doctors and that's not fair." I retorted immediately.

"Relax Sandy boy" she handed me a glass of water "why are you having a twist in your boxers, I just stated for the fun of it, its not like I am denying to marry you since you are doctor"

Her statement might have taken me aback but I did not have time to react because next words erupting out of her smart mouth "oh wait between I guess you are not wearing any boxers, they are wet since you plunged directly into a pool with them" then she slapped her mouth that was now widely open with the thought that had recently occurred to her "You aren't wearing anything under" and next her eyes snapped to the zipper of the tight skin-fit levis jeans that I was wearing thus making me fill my windpipe with the water that should have traveled some other route.

The echoed laughter followed as I excused myself to the washroom to help my drenched clothes

Thanks to Sia and her verdict.

'''''''

I was weirdly and uncomfortably sashaying left and then right lifting the crotch area, oops that sounded weird 

Amends

I was lifting the zipper area of my jeans high above to the hand dryer trying to dry off the wet patch of jeans.

Well if you are wondering why I simply do not remove my jeans and dry it holding towards the blower than I'd kindly request you to scroll your memory a little ahead of time and remember my humiliating conversation with Sia earlier, I am not wearing any.. you now remember what and I am not in mood of public display of my jewels as hence I am doing this awkward dance or pretending to do the nasty that I am actually not

Oh forget it don't bother, it's the cold rubbing off me.

However the warmth seeping through my clothes with the dryer was brought to an abrupt halt with the shrilling ring of my mobile phone.

Ow! I wasn't surprised to be greeted by 34 missed calls mostly from dad, few from my friends and other acquaintances.

Closing my eyes and sending a short prayer upwards I pressed the dreadful green button.

"SANDEEP" the expected usual yelling followed by series of harmless curses in Punjabi "[khote da puttar*son of a donkey*]"

Any guess who he is referring to as a donkey?

"Where the f## is this world are you? And god forbid" he shouted in his own melodramatic tone "Why did you miss your appointment? Why don't you understand that is for your own good? I thought you were healing" he sighed for long with a long pause then came to what he was at best; threatening me "I want you home in an hour and I mean an hour or I swear I'll put the entire Delhi to curfew and send a search squad to hunt you down."

I really wanted say dad you have a great social circle that I approve but by no means are you influential enough to send a search squad for any body.

But I like a great son that I am least considered that I am I simply answered "Yes dad"

"Don't you dare yes dad me Sandeep" he was pretty aggressive "Genelia is also home here with me and she wants to talk or shall I say that I want you two to talk. Come home soon." He ordered or barked I couldn't differentiate but I did not know I had the courage to shout back "What is Genelia doing there with you. We are over, we are done." I said with a tone of finality.

"Listen young man." My father said in his authoritative tone "I guess your mom has brought you up better than the way you are shouting on the phone" his tone now filled with a little plight like he missed her

The hell he did!

"Sorry dad but I think she cut all the ties when she threw the ring at me." I said quietly.

"People commit mistakes" he added "you should learn to forgive son. Love is bigger than any other emotion" I knew what he was referring to but what he wanted would take time.

"Dad I do not want to see her, not now." I paused trying to find ways to convince him "Can you do me a huge favor and send her home please" I begged.

I don't know why my relationship with her felt like a chord holding me tight from my neck.

I was done pretending that we were happy together.

I wasn't.

"You know son loneliness drives one crazy and you need a companion." He waited for me to speak but after considerable moment of silence he finally gave in "I'll see what I can do."

"Hey by the way she got her nose pierced and is looking funny" he finally couldn't help but gossip even when we were discussing exigencies.

"She was excited asked me twice if she was looking good' he laughed a bit and I could imagine him cupping his hand on the phone as she continued 'I wanted to tell her, Mr. Wamsey's daughter too got hers pierced but failed and caught some infection making her nose look like that of a buffalo's but I bit my tongue. God bless her" he chuckled at his own joke.

I knew this was his way of making me feel good whether it worked or not.

So I laughed along "I'll see you later dad."

"Yes but let me tell you Genelia might not be an ideal girl but still you need a woman in your life. Didn't your therapist say something about you having a friend earlier"

Thankfully the call was disconnected and now the wet patch was only a dried blotch that was visible only if one sees it closely

Hoping that Sia isn't too blunt this time when she comments on my lack of underwear I walk down the series of empty chairs and tables at the small diner to reach her waiting for another round of mocking humiliation for me.

Don't worry I am good

I take them sportingly

"Mrs Deesha's son, no no no no no" Sia was on phone and dismissive "I am NOT going to meet him" she said firmly.

"Don't worry I am not dying alone and if Mrs. Deesha is so uh.. huh.." she was trying to process words to refer the old lady "with tomatoes cheeks and fingers adorned with stones of different sizes and colors each adding a different meaning and different mode of expectation in her life." She pressed her temples "she seems so artificial. I don't want to see her son"

A few words were exchanged in which she mocked and compare the lady's son face to that of a menstrual cup, hollow.

Well you might have got by now that I zoned out of the conversation, this girl has the capacity to get the author of Kama sutra flushed with her open hearted and unorthodox conversations.

Well she snapped shut her phone when the steaming hot ravioli was served without a mutter of apology.

"Lets eat in peace" she said as she rubbed her hands attacking the ravioli and having them shove in her cute mouth.

Well a sight to see and before the nasty thoughts of how smart and good looking her mouth was and I how it made the sinful stirrings in my body, our tranquil was cut by another shrilling ring of my cell.

She made a disappointed face and I was about to hit the ignore button of my cell when dad's picture started dancing on my screen.

Confident that I had already had him under control I picked the phone to inform him that I'll be home soon.

"Hello"

I straightened after a reply back hello from the other end

"Genelia" I sighed "I told dad I do not want to talk."

"You do know that you need me." She said and I could actually visualize the evident fluttering of her lashes "Didn't your therapist say that you are lonely after her and you need company?" she stressed on her very well knowing that mentioning her would touch me deep. "Don't be stubborn Sandeeeeeep" she purred.

"Look Genelia I know she is gone and she is never coming back." I was frustrated and loud, I hate to admit the truth "I also remember I need company. Also I wanted to say it in person but you leave no choice." I apologized mentally for being rude and hurting her but if I do not do now I wont be able to do it ever and would hurt each other rest of our lives.

I do not know whether love exists or not but I was sure by now that there never has been love or will ever be between two of us "You are a great friend Genelia and very beautiful too" I admired her compensating the harsh words that were to be followed next "I understand that I need company and should get married but one thing is for sure even if I get married it wouldn't be you."

"You cannot do this to me Sandeep" she cried 

"Genelia please there is someone lucky out there who'd be blessed to be your better half. Unfortunately I am not blessed."

I could hear shuffling from other end, probably Genelia wiping her tears. Angrily she spat "Yes you are cursed. You wont ever get a partner and I am sure you wont get married ever." She said curtly and disconnected the dreaded call.

"Oooommpphh" I let the breath that I so confidently knew I was holding "I know I am cursed, I mumbled, but how to explain this to dad." I mumbled trying to be inaudible.

But the pity looks that Sia was throwing at me, I knew she heard but fortunately she didn't bring up the talk and offered the last piece of ravioli and when I denied, my mood glum.

She shrugged and put it in her mouth, mouthing "Your loss"

I invariantly chuckled "You are so mean." Looking at the empty plate I confessed "I am starving.'

"Don't worry you will live and not die of starvation." The look of horror on my face made her chuckle "I have already ..' she paused mid sentence looking at the annoying device which had pinged displaying a message for her.

How irritating it can become some times when you are with a person and the other person prefers talking or chatting to a faraway friend ignoring the one he has at the moment.

Holy f##king mixed breed babies of chicken and pig s**t!

No it wasn't me cursing but Sia.

I would never let chicken and pigs mate.

Hey wait it is practically impossible for chicken and pigs...

Damn what am I thinking?

Next she was yelling on the phone "I AM NOT GOING TO MEET THAT M. C. faced idiot."

"Out of all I said you want to know what does MC mean?"

"God you are a gynaec you should know." She yelled irritably "well than go look for google MC is mentstrual ..."

She stopped and like I could analyze there were series of expletives by none other than Angie.

"Look Pari meeting this guy is useless." 

I could hear some more argument from the other side of the line.

"Useless I mean useless. How do I explain that?"

She breathed in, looked at me from top to bottom and then nodded as if approving something

But what?

And then she said politely "Okay it is useless" she was now soft spoken "because I already have a boyfriend who has just proposed me now."

"GEEZE woman" Sia threw the phone away from her ear and then pulled it back "can we keep the excitement dance for later?"

"Okay okay I will get him to meet you"

"Okay all of you. Yes. Yes I am engaged" Sia eyed her empty ring finger smoothly finishing off with the lie.

"What?" she yelled

I realized I was gaping at her.

Closing my mouth or having it closed by Sia as she tipped my chin upward I asked, "You are engaged?"

She laughed a little "no way. Just a little stunt to keep that M," then she changed the name

Thank god!

"Pari's new eligible bachelor for me away."

"You do know you are one hell of a ... " I was searching my vocabulary for the right word "you are. You are malicious and it is so damn attractive."

"Thank god I thought you were saying maleficent" she gave a small bow "I am glad that you find that quality attractive, Mr. Charmer" she teased with a wink.

Had I not been sure of the age gap between the two of us, I would have mentioned she teased seductively.

Another steaming plate of ravioli arrived and I couldn't help the drool coming from my mouth "finally the evening gets better" I clapped my hands "I get to eattt" I said in a sing song way.

I expected a chuckle or laughter but there was silence.

"These steaming ravioli not helping?" I asked tentatively "you are not enjoying?"

'Oh I am" she tried to enunciate her stance "its just that there is a teeny bit of a problem."

"You in problem?'

That was new, last I remember she is the begetter, designer or originator of problems herself well for others of course.

"Need some help?" then I backed up "want to share?"

"Oh I need a fiancée" she waved her hands "not a big problem"

I was in hysterics of cough having choked or gulped the whole piece of ravioli in one go.

She patted me on my head.

I wanted to say 'patting on back would have been better, no need of abuse' but I had bigger matters to be handled

One was to kill off my curiosity that prevents me from killing few more innocent cats.

"Getting a fiancée is not a big deal for you?" I asked horrified "do you have an online stores that delivers fiancées"

She was simply taking in my panic mode when I added just for the sake of fun "if there really is can you order one for me, can save the havoc I have in my life at home" and just like I was on fire or overdrive reckless with my words I added "oh it would be better if we have different varieties or choices, not too long, nor too short, fair, Indian or African, that won't bother' I shrugged the thought of racism and the out of blue I added "it would be great if the fiancé doesn't verve to marry, if.." I was again looking for the thesaurus in the juggle of words floating within my head "if.. it would actually be great if it was not a fiancée fiancée, an actual fiancée but a pretended one to show off or display"

Like you know an epiphany being announced loudly or a bolt of realization striking her she leaned forward as if lunging to pluck both my lips together so that I stop talking

Instead she asked me to repeat "what did you just say?"

Scared that I offended her, I looked at my feet.

Like a kid who'd broken a vase earlier but hid it and when asked what he was doing; scared he apologizes I repeated

"I am sorry"

"For what?" she asked not intending for an answer but continued "A fiancé for display." She smiled "I like the idea. What was the word?"

Whoa she needs my mental thesaurus

Feeling huge and bloated of being useful I was about to smile when she said on her own

"Pretend.. Yes I want a pretended fiance' yippee!" she celebrated like she'd finally managed to speak the right words to open the Alibaba's castle filled with gold.

"Are you crazy?" I yelled "kiddo this isn't a joke.'

"Hey don't you kiddo me." She glared at me being offended.

She pointed her big rounded, perfectly shaped assets of her I mean her breas.., ahh you know what "Do I look like a kid and I am not CRAZY"

"Pretended fiancé'" she rolled the syllable in her mouth enjoying the feel of it 'this is going to solve a lot of my problems and the latest one being Pari eager to meet my boyfriend who just proposed me for engagement."

She rolled her hands a scheme plotting in her malicious head

Now I can use the word maleficent for her. 

"Sia what you are planning to do is wrong. You are playing with fire." I tried to warn.

"Don't be sissy Sandy" she waivered my objections and warnings "you just confessed you too need one to solve what in your life,,,," she paused and said instantaneously "havoc in your life. Am I right?"

"This is outright ridiculous" I yelled, "she was being larger than life -alright, she was behaving matured –alright.

But what she implied here was nothing but non-sense.

Doesn't she realize whom and what she is proposing?

"Do you have any idea what you are trying to impose? I think you need to get a filter for your words, even your thoughts. Your idea is completely futile." I was raging by now.

I could hardly control my hormones around her and what she was imposing was next to impossible.

Pretending fiancé'?

She too a deep sigh almost pitying me as she rubbed my temples with her two fingers "Relax Sandy, you are the charmer. If you'd worry so much you might get wrinkles soon. And why are you reverting the idea of being my fiancée. I thought you liked me."

"Of course I like you" I reiterated defensively.

"Oh" she passed a wolf smile at me mocking me "I already know you like me, I didn't miss the looks you gave me other day at the restaurant" she eyed me as if I were some pervert "when I removed my dress shirt. You were obviously checking me out."

'I.. I I mean I wasn't I..." she shut my mouth close with the tip of her fingers and remarked 'don't gape like a fish than pulling both the sides of her cheeks insides she pouted like a fish and brought her gilden orbs in the center."

Forgetting what kind of argument we were having I broke into fits of laughter.

She laughed along and now picked the chair besides me to sit and held my palms in hers.

No I am not going to describe how nice her touch felt.

"Please Sandy for me. I am so tired of their being my wing men and women, hooking me up and finding a groom for me obsession." She almost begged.

"Sia we" I air quoted between the two of us "are never going to work?"

"We don't have to work Sandy." Sia wanted to argue but I cut her off.

"Sia look at the age gap between the two of us, Angie is my only best friend whom I trust and expect the same from her, she'd be very disappointed." I took a deep breath "heck! Raj would get his balls in his hands and would even try stoning me to death with same balls of his."

She puckered her lips appreciatively "your humor is still intact even though you are angry" she rested her arms in intimately on my shoulders "I am impressed."

She shifted closer ignoring the glares I was shooting in her direction and continued inquisitively "Between why are you so scared of my brother Raj? Why does he intimidate you so much?'

"No," I was loud and confident.

Yes yes defensive too.

Why can't you let my li'l ego pass?

"I am not all scared of Raj," I proclaimed like it was a petition.

"So you are not afraid of Raj?" she asked.

"Nopes, na, nada." I answered confidently.

"So that's final now. You are my fiance'" before I could say something she added "a pretended one"

"But this is wrong" I tried to put some senses into her.

Ignoring me she continued "if you are worried about Pari and her friendship, don't worry she isn't the kind of person who'd judge and let her friendship be affected because you fell in love with a girl eight years younger than you."

"Six years" I invariably correctly her.

She raised her eyebrows multiple times, her golden orbs dancing with mischief "So you have already been thinking about" she raised her chin excitedly and pointed between two of us "Us" she clapped her hands for an added dramatized effect.

"So we are doing this." She officially proclaimed without waiting for my assent, "so from now on I am your fiancée, I like the sound of that" she raised the glass of water as toast.

"His fiancée?" the lady probably some staff form the waterpark who had joined us lately asked.

Sia nodded excitedly in acceptance.

While I mumbled besides her "His pretended fiancée"