Twice in a Lifetime

Chapter 1-2

Jude woke up gasping for air. His heart pounded so hard he thought it would burst open his chest. His head hurt as though he’d actually been shot, and tears streamed from his burning eyes. He twisted the switch on his bedside lamp, bathing his bedroom in yellow light.

His bedroom. He was not at the gas station again. He wiped the tears off and got out of bed. Damn. Five years and he still had the dream. Martin had been the only one killed by the robber that day. The clerk had been shot, but survived and informed the police that Martin’s last three words were just Oh, wait, I—

He walked into the bathroom, turned on the faucet, and splashed water on his pale skin. The dream always started out like it had the day of Martin’s murder.

But then as Martin left to go into the market, Jude became him in the dream. He was the one walking inside and getting shot, but as Martin.

The psychiatrist told him it was because he wished it had been him instead of Martin killed that day. Jude didn’t know if that was true or not. He just knew the dream was seriously f****d up.

He ran his fingers through his Kelly green curls, probably time to change his hair again, then his hand along his stubbled jaw. Dark smudges appeared under his eyes. He looked seriously jacked.

A black cat slinked into the bathroom, rubbing along his bare legs.

“Hey, Sebastian,” he said softly, bending down to scratch behind his ears. “I don’t think I can bloody well go back to sleep now.”

Back in the bedroom he noticed the time on the digital clock said five-thirty. Sighing heavily, he pulled on his discarded jeans from yesterday and a sweatshirt that said Newcastle United.

He threw some canned cat food in a dish for Sebastian before opening the door to the outside stairs. His small flat was above his flower shop, St. Jude’s. At the bottom of the stairs he undid the lock on his bike and road down to the beach. He usually didn’t open the shop until nine-thirty.

At the beach Jude sat in the sand, leaning his head against his knees and stared out at Sutter’s Bay. He rubbed his chest, as though that could make the pain of Martin’s death any less. He’d been lucky to find the love of his life. He should be grateful he’d had the eight months he had with Martin. Only he didn’t feel grateful.

Martin hadn’t died immediately. He’d been taken to the hospital. There he’d been declared brain dead and the doctors asked his parents what they wanted to do with Martin’s organs. His lover’s parents hadn’t approved of Martin being gay and hadn’t even seen him for years. Yet they were allowed to decide Martin’s fate while Jude hadn’t even been allowed in the hospital room or at the funeral.

Jude stayed to watch the sunrise, but eventually decided he needed to go home, shower, and eat breakfast before he opened the shop.

Being late September, the houses in the neighborhoods surrounding his shop were decorated with jack-o’-lanterns, witches, and scarecrows for Halloween. He’d let a local artist kid paint ghosts and pumpkins on the front window of his flower shop.

Jude relocked his bike to the bottom of the stairs and returned to his apartment for his shower. He guessed he could cook his own breakfast but decided against it. Vic’s Café happened to be right next door.

When he first walked in at just after seven-thirty, the only other customer was old Frank Carter sitting in the corner booth. As far as Jude knew he was here every morning and had been for years, even back when Vic himself had owned the place. Vic died before Jude ever moved to Sutter’s Bay and his son, Adam, owned the cafe.

Jude approached the counter and sat down.

Adam walked over, wiping his hands on his apron. “Morning, Jude. You want coffee?”

“That would be great, thanks.” He picked up the tattered menu.

Adam brought his coffee in a chipped white mug and folded his muscular arms across his chest. The man was pretty good-looking. Well, for someone in his forties anyway. He even had a touch of silver at his temples. He always wore the same thing every time Jude had seen him. Jeans and a tight white T-shirt.

“You look like hell,” Adam commented.

“Yeah. You got some Baileys for this coffee?”

Adam raised a brow. “A little early for that.”

He shrugged. “Maybe. You got some anyway?”

Adam bent beneath the counter and brought out a small bottle. He poured a dollop in Jude’s coffee. “What else can I get you?”

“What’s the special this morning?”

“Short stack, two eggs, choice of bacon or sausage.”

“All right, I’ll have that. Poached with sausage.”

Adam nodded and moved away, off toward the window to the kitchen.

Jude sighed and sipped his doctored coffee while still trying to push the dream…nightmare out of his mind. He hadn’t had the dream in a few months, but he never went too long without thinking of that day.

The bell over the door jangled and Jude glanced in the direction to see who had entered the café. He blinked. The man standing there was a stranger. A f*****g incredible one.

The stranger wore a black cowboy hat of all things, but he was tall, really tall, over six feet Jude guessed, and built of solid muscle. The hair he could see that wasn’t covered by the hat appeared to be the color of chestnuts. Blue jeans framed his backside and he wore a charcoal gray button-down shirt. Jude would bet five dollars he wore cowboy boots. In order to know for sure, though, he’d have to lean back on the stool, which would make his perusal pretty damn obvious.

The man sat at the counter several spots away from Jude. Adam approached him, had a few words, and then brought the man coffee.

Jude picked up his own mug and tried not to drool. Adam walked over to him with the coffeepot, offering him more.

“Bad dreams again?” Adam was one of the few people in the area who knew the truth of what had caused Jude to flee San Francisco. Most people assumed he had a bad break up.

“How’d you guess?”

“You look like hell and the drinking is pretty early even for you.”

Jude grimaced. Even for him? Did Adam think he was an alcoholic or something? “As a matter of fact I did have the dream and it was awful, thank you very much.”

“When was the last time you talked to Dr. Carew?” Adam referred to Sutter Bay’s very own psychiatrist. If anything ailed you, residents of the small city would give you the unsolicited advice of speaking to the good quack.

“I spoke to him at the grocery store. Nice polite chap.”

“I’m serious, Jude.”

He stared hard right back at Adam. “So am I.” He flicked his head just slightly in the direction of the café’s newest arrival. “Who is that?”

“Rex Warner.”

Jude raised an eyebrow. “Rex?”

“Uh-huh. He’s from Texas.”

Jude smirked and glanced the cowboy’s way. “Never would have guessed. Is he just passing through Sutter’s Bay?”

“Nope, he set up shop here,” Adam said.

“Doing what? Roping cows?”

Adam grinned. “Nah, he’s a vet.”

Jude tugged his bottom lip with his teeth and eyed Rex Warner with renewed interest. “A vet, huh? Competition for old Gonzalez?”

“Actually, Dr. Gonzalez plans on retiring before the end of the year and Dr. Warner is taking over his practice.”

“Well, aren’t you in the know?” Jude rolled his eyes and took another long swallow of his coffee. “Pardon me for asking and all, but did I just step into Mayberry?”

The other man shrugged. “You asked. Be right back with your breakfast.”

Jude couldn’t seem to look away from the new vet. Any minute now the man would turn around and demand he stop staring. In a way, Jude sort of wished he would because at the moment, Rex Warner didn’t seem remotely interested in glancing in his direction.

It was unnerving, really, the man refusing to look his way. Usually when someone blatantly stared it became so noticeable you couldn’t help but look. Not so Rex.

Jude coughed. Frank Carter glared his way, but Rex didn’t even move. His eyes were locked on the menu Adam had given him earlier.

He sighed and gave up. What did he care if some straight cowboy noticed him anyway? He got up from his stool, went around the counter, and grabbed the coffeepot to refill his cup. He resisted adding more Baileys after Adam’s implication a few minutes before. He was about to set the pot back on the warmer when he noticed Rex Warner’s cup.

Shrugging, Jude walked over to the man and poured coffee into his half-empty cup. He waited for Rex to look up. The man had set his menu down and had picked up a newspaper.

“Eggs over easy, bacon crisp, fried potatoes, and an English muffin.”

“Right, I’ll tell your server.”

At that, Rex did lower the paper and stared at Jude.

He decided then and there dark chocolate eyes framed with long, black lashes ought to be illegal. The man was a bloody god, no doubt about it.

“Your hair is green,” Rex said, his gaze flickering up to Jude’s dyed green curls.

“Yes.” It wasn’t a question, but Jude answered it as though it was and that was all he managed to say. He just stood there staring at Rex, the coffeepot in hand.

Adam came hurrying over and with an eye rolling look at Jude grabbed the coffeepot. “Um, sorry, Dr. Warner. I’ll be with you in second. Jude, your breakfast is at your seat.”

Jude wanted to say something else, but couldn’t begin to think of anything that would sound halfway intelligent, so he sauntered back to his seat and picked up his fork to eat his breakfast.

He felt more than just a little bit ridiculous. He’d finally managed to get Rex’s attention and all he’d done was stare as though the man were a zoo exhibit.

Bloody brilliant.

He reminded himself the dude was likely arrow straight and completely off limits to him. Besides, Jude was not looking for anything but mind numbingly great s*x, which he had wisely decided to seek outside Sutter’s Bay where no one would know him. Best to keep it that way.

He ate his food quickly, probably too quickly as he barely tasted it, and then threw down his money on the counter. He was suddenly quite anxious to be done with Vic’s.

“Thanks, Adam,” he called as he rushed through the door.

* * * *

Rex turned to watch the green-haired kid leave. His gaze lingered just a bit on his backside. Finding someone like that in Sutter’s Bay had been quite surprising. Could make things in the sleepy little ‘burb quite a bit more interesting.

“So,” Rex said casually as Adam placed his breakfast in front of him. “Who was that man who just left?”

“Jude.”

“Jude what?”

Adam shrugged. “Just Jude. Don’t know his last name. Don’t think he’s ever told anyone in Sutter’s Bay what it is. He runs the flower shop next door, St. Jude’s.”

Rex glanced in the direction of the florist shop. He’d noticed it a few times, but had no reason to visit there. Perhaps he’d have to make up a reason soon. Though he hadn’t missed the blatant interest in Jude’s gaze, it had been his experience being attached to someone didn’t stop some people from flirting or even cheating, so Rex found himself asking, “Married? Girlfriend? Boyfriend?”

Adam’s smirk was distinctly amused. “None of the above.”

Rex wanted to question him more about Jude, but didn’t feel like sharing his interest with others, so he shrugged and reached for his coffee. Adam placed his breakfast in front of him.

He’d only been in Sutter’s Bay a month. Truth be told, Rex hadn’t been entirely sure what had drawn him to the place when he decided to set up practice there.

Rex had come to California to attend the U.C. Davis School of Veterinary Medicine. Originally he’d thought he would return to Texas, but then he’d found he loved California. He’d worked at another veterinarian’s office in Sacramento for a few years before deciding to venture out on his own, and then he’d met Dr. Gonzalez at a lecture. He’d come to check out the practice in Sutter’s Bay at the old vet’s invitation. It felt right the moment he’d arrived.

He’d found himself having breakfast once a week at Vic’s Café. He finished his breakfast, picked up the check and pulled out his wallet. He had a full day of appointments and needed to concentrate on them, not pretty little florists.

Still he found himself looking toward the shop when he went to get into his BMW coupe. His hand poised on the driver side door, Rex very nearly locked it again and took the short walk to St. Jude’s. Shaking his head, he got in, started up the coupe, and drove away.