My Rockstar Baby Daddy

Chapter 11 Sorting Thoughts

POV: Sapphire

I walk out of the doctor's office in a daze. What do I do? "Saf? Are you ok?" Ella asks me gently after seeing me once I'm back inside of her car. "Yeah. um, actually I don't know." I respond chokingly. "Oh my, what did they say?" Ella asks worriedly. Tears drop down from my eyes and my hand instantly goes to my lower abdomen.

Ella reaches over hugging me. "Babe, what happened? Is it serious? You don't have the clap or something like that do you?" Ella asks causing me to laugh. "I definitely caught something from that guy but it's not what you think..." I take a deep breath," Ella, I'm pregnant." I whisper.

"I'm sorry what did you say?" Ella says wanting me to repeat it. "Ella, please don't tell anyone. I'm pregnant." I beg her. Every worry runs through my head. Will I keep this baby? Will I give it away? How will I support it? Do I drop out of school? Do I tell Hayden? What am I going to do once the baby is born? I'll be off work for a period of time. Can I afford this? Do I have enough room in my apartment? Is it a boy or a girl?

A few of my questions I know immediately the answer the second I ask myself them. Yes, I'm keeping it. I won't abandon my child like I was. I'm going to tell Hayden. He deserves to know and most importantly this child deserves the chance to know who he is. I don't care if he wants nothing to do with me or the child but I will make sure to have the answers he or she will long for at the ready. I don't want it to be left wondering what if all it's life. I know all too well what that's like.

"Wow." Ella breaths out. "Yeah." I breathe. We sit there deep in thought about the whole thing for a while. "So, what are you going to do?" Ella asks. "The truth is I don't know. I'll figure it out." I tell her. I've been in tough spots before. This is just a new challenge. One for the next 18 years but I can handle it.

"I won't tell anyone. I know you need to sort things out before people come to know. I'll help you in whatever way I can." Ella says starting the car. "Thanks, I'm ready to go home now," I tell her. She's a really good friend. "Of course, What are sisters for?" Ella says.

Ella drops me at home. The first thing I do when I get home is take Rusty out. We walked around the block once. She loves to go outside to walk, run and play. Maybe one day I can afford a house with a yard for her and this little critter inside me to run around in.

When we get back home I take out one of my meal prep trays and nuke it in the microwave. I don't do this every day but after getting my thoughts confirmed I just want to sit down and figure this out.

Babies need a lot. They're expensive. I look down at my phone and make the final decision to take a leap of faith. I tap Hayden's name on my phone screen choosing to text him first. 'Hi, I don't know if you remember me or not. I'm Sapphire. We met at the Rivers Hotel bar and things got a little wild. Anyway, I was wondering if we could meet up sometime. It's important that I talk to you.'

I stared at the phone for a good ten minutes wishing he would respond right away but that was stupid because why would he do that? My heart pounds in my chest as more what-if questions filter through my mind. What if he doesn't have this number anymore? What if he has a girlfriend or worse is married? What if he wants nothing to do with me and ignores me? What if he has me blocked? What if he's dead? I know that last one was out there.

Even if this guy wants nothing to do with this child, I will love it no matter what. I already do.