Ruined Innocence

Have you ever been in love with someone that you can’t have? Because I do. I am in love with someone who is really above level than me. Funny, right? That person is popular while I’m a nobody. A hundred percent that he will never notice me. It’s like I am chasing a star that is possible to reach. Like you’re running on a treadmill that there’s no final destination. I have been always the shadow kid in school. Nobody wants to talk to me nor be near me. I even know that all of our professors hate me, they just didn’t say a word but the eyes say it all. I don’t even know why they hate me, yes, some stupid jocks punches me in the face but I never really mind. I just let them. Karma will be hitting on them soon. All I mind is that person who I always look forward to. Walking to this hell every morning is my routine. What, school is hell. If it’s not for that person that I’m in love with, I will never go to this stupid place. I was walking in the hall with my head low since all of the students keeps on giving me weird and disgusted looks. This is so uncomfortable when they are staring. I pick out the books that I’m going to use for my schedule and immediately close my locker. I turned around and there... I saw him. His eyes always spark wherever he goes. Those biggest smiles made his eyes tiny until he sees nothing. His soft brown hair bounces every time he walks in happiness. He is the sunshine of this town. My sunshine. As I busied myself mesmerizing his beauty, he snakes his hand into his boyfriend’s neck and kisses him on the lips. Oh, how I wish I could taste those plump pink lips of his. Shane, his boyfriend also wrapped his arms into his small waist to kiss him back. I scoff at the scene I am looking at right now. Not that I am jealous but I know that Shane is a scum who hurts him. I always heard them on the rooftop having some arguments and sometimes Bailee cried in defeat. Poor him. If he’s in my arms, I will never do stupid things for him to get hurt. I will kill everybody who dares to mess with him. Not now but soon. The school bell rang and everybody went to their respective classroom. I’m so happy that I’m in the class with Bailee. He is the only one who keeps me from attending my classes. The teacher started to go with her class but I didn’t bother since I was busy staring at his back. Creepy, I know. But you can’t stop me from seeing him from afar. “Okay, everybody. For your assignment, I want you to find yourself a partner. This project is in pairs so I want you and your partner to work on this. You two should cooperate and not let your partner do the work. Understand?” Seriously what kind of assignment that it should have a tandem? This kind of setting shows that you can’t do a single thing without a companion. Each of us should be independent and learn how to stand on ourselves. Anyways, everyone has already a partner and I am the one who is left out. Who wants to have a partner like a weird boy like me? Whatever, it’s not like I can’t do it alone. “Chandler? Who is your partner?” the teacher suddenly asks when he notices that I am doing some doodle in my notebook. I glance at her and smiled. God, I hope she gets it already. “I am.” I turned my head to that familiar voice. He took a glance at me and back to our professor. “I am Chandler’s partner,” Bailee said. The students in the room gasped when he said those. Even me. Some students keep on murmuring some things. “Is he serious?” “I don’t think so. Maybe it is just a prank?” “Maybe he is pulling up some games?” “What if Shane finds this out? Bailee will be in big trouble.” “Bailee? Chandler it is. Shane will beat the s**t out of Chandler for being Bailee’s partner.” Bailee smiled at me and stood up from his seat. He grabbed some sticky notes and a pen. He wrote something on it and handed it to me. It is his number. “Call me if you’re not busy. We can do our project this weekend.” He smiled and went back to his seat. I stared at the sticky note that he handed me and I still can’t believe that he had just given me his number. His freakin’ number. He finally notices me. I am now his partner and he is my partner. I have never been so happy. This is the best thing that ever happened to my life. “Hey, loser. Stop staring at that piece of paper that he gave you, it will melt.” Kai, Shane’s friend sneered. I fold the small note and put it in my pocket. I will make sure that I won’t lose this. The bell rang again which means it is lunchtime already but I never go to the cafeteria, instead, I hid in the boy’s restroom or on the rooftop. I once ate my lunch in the cafeteria and Shane meant to pour a chicken stock on my head. He told me that it was an accident but he really meant it. He hates my guts and I don’t know why. I was about to enter the restroom when I saw Kayden leaning at the door. Kayden is also one of my bullies also. He and Shane really like to make me their punching bag. I gulped at my sight and Kayden smirked seeing the worried and scared in my face. He didn’t hesitate but to grab my wrist and pull me upstairs to the rooftop. Oh boy, another bruise is coming. Nobody saw us because it is lunchtime and the hall is empty. Kayden did wait for me.   Sweet.   When we got to the rooftop, he pushes me to the ground and hovers over me. He started to punch me in my cheeks and to my jaws. What did I do wrong? I want to fight back but he is really strong. I’ll just wait for him to get tired from punching me. Suddenly, he stood up and dust himself off while I was on the ground lying lifeless. “That’s a good exercise. Say, I heard Bailee is your partner? Congrats, you are the talk of the school. Oh and by the way, don’t blame me. Shane told me to teach you a lesson.” He said and walked away. What the hell was that? I gathered myself up and went directly to the restroom. Gladly, nobody saw me in this state. I looked at my reflection and I already saw the color purple in my left eye. This will leave a bruise at any second. I wiped my bloody lip with a tissue and fix my messy hair. Boy, Kayden punches really hard. I would’ve been knocked out. I looked at the time on my phone and three more hours before the class ends. I smirked. Just wait there. The class is over and my eyes were on Kayden as he goes out of the gate. I’m in the corner of the school, leaning as I watch what he is doing. When he’s out of the school, I followed him but meters apart so that he won’t suspect anything. The same routine as always. He grabs his cigarettes in his pockets and lights them up and he walks home. He always uses the alley as a shortcut to his home and I smirked drawn into my face since this is always been part of my plan. Getting rid of him. I’m so sick of his ass. The turned left to the alley and I check the surroundings if it is clear before I followed him. Nobody dares to walk into his alley. Aside from its dark, it is also dangerous. Who knows maybe someone was following you with a weapon in their hand. Kayden stopped and turned around. He was now facing me. He scoffs and threw his cigars away and scratches his nape. “I knew you were following me.” He said. I just smiled at him, “I’m aware of that.” I walked to him and he just smirked. He didn’t bother. He is also superior and really confident. “You want another beating, I see.” He flicked his tongue and glared at me. But before he laid another punch at me, I already stabbed him in his torso. Blood was coming out from his mouth as he kneels down on his knee, covering his stabbed wounds. He looked at me and I just smiled. “W-what the f-fuck.” He coughs blood. Ah damn, now I’m covered with blood. Good thing I have my hoodie. “Got any last word, p***y boy?” I ask him. “f**k you.” I nodded and didn’t hesitate to grab his hair at the back and immediately slit his throat with a knife causing his blood to burst out. And that’s how Kayden died.