His One and Only Mate

Chapter 4

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*CADEN POV*

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I wind the wrap around my hand tightly, forming it perfectly as I was taught for hand to hand combat. I take a glance in the mirror as I start the other one, and hating myself all over again. I desperately need to hit something.

I know that chance storm didn’t come from nowhere. Alina’s upset. Upset enough to lose a small amount of control. She hasn’t had an issue in a long time, and that worries me, but I’m scared to know that it’s my fault. I should be the one to comfort her when she’s like this, but I just… can’t.

I’ve been pushing her away for over a year, as much as it kills me to do so. And each time I see the sadness in her eyes… ugh, it kills me. But each frown pushes me to be better. I’m hoping by the time she hits 16, my wolf won’t be so weak anymore. If anything, I’m hoping I could at least be strong enough to hunt alone.

I know she wouldn’t reject me, but I’m not looking forward to seeing her reaction to my wolf. I never want to be a disappointment to Alina. She should be proud of her mate through and through, and that’s what pushes me to be better for her.

The loud grunts mixed with hits and sounds of banter has me turn from the mirror and shaking out my limbs to loosen myself up. I take a few steps and exit from the large tent into the open field. This past week, I helped dad and the others build a make-shift fighting ring, to give those who aren’t as privileged as us a few lessons in fighting, straight from the king’s guard. It was Micah’s idea, even though he sits on the sidelines most of the time, like he is now.

He misses you

I close my eyes and take a breath before opening them again. I saw my brother last night, looking to the sky and looking seriously lonely. Alina isn’t the only one I’ve been neglecting since my shift. Home life just isn’t the same anymore. Micah has long stopped asking me to go to the castle with him, or eat breakfast with him and Alina. Our conversations have gotten shorter, and sometimes, I just don’t know what to say. But when Alina pointed it out, and I saw with opened eyes on the strain I’ve put us all in, I knew I needed to start to change that.

I sat down and talked with him. At first, we were both awkward, trying to find some common ground, then I saw the Bo staff Sven gave him, and we played around, watching each other throw some moves. We actually laughed, and when we got home, I tried to think of the last time I actually smiled, let alone laughed.

“Over here, Caden!” a guy, Orion I think, calls me over. I nod and pass by Nate and Reggie showing some moves to the younger kids.

Talking with Micah last night, I understood why he wanted this stupid party, but based on the conversations in the stables, I really don’t care to get to know any of them. It probably has to do with being raised practically in the guard full of weres 100+ years older than I am, because when I’m around kids my age, I just get a really bad headache- I don’t like their petty minds games and sense of entitlement.

There’s a weight to my shoulders that I take seriously in life. My mate will depend on me one day, and I won’t let her down.

I recognize some of the faces around me from the intense training camp I begged dad to take me to when I wasn’t ready to face Alina. We partner up and, to my dismay, I end up stuck with the jackass that pulled me into his s**t conversation about mates. I did not want to be the center of attention with that topic, and I couldn’t out right and say ‘Yes, my mate is the princess, and possibly the most powerful being in the realm’. Yea, that would’ve gone over very well, especially since most of the guys have seen my wolf.

Once it’s our turn to fight, I go in hard, swinging right into his weak points. I let him get one hit in, but once I got him on the ground, it was game over, and way too easy to have him tap out. He would never make it into any type of rank in the guard.

“Go Caden!!!” I turn and seeing a blonde girl I don’t know with way too much lipstick on. When she giggles with her girlfriends, I can even see some on her teeth. Gross.

“Dude,” my weak partner wheezes from the ground. “If I was getting Tonya’s attention, I’d be all over that.” I reluctantly stick my hand out to help him up, as a few others huddle around us congratulating me.

“I heard she even goes all the way,” some other dude half whispers.

Orion claps me on the back. “Dude, you whipped James’ behind way too quickly.” My lips tip up but then he huddles all of us closer together. “Hey, so I snuck some of my dad’s fae juice, if you catch my drift.”

“Holy s**t dude, you brought Absinthe?!”

“Shhh, keep your voice down, i***t!”

I look around, hoping another round of fighting will start soon. Maybe I can get Sven, oh hell, even Dad to use me as a demonstration on proper techniques. Usually an hour of that will exhaust me.

“Man, that s**t will get you f****d up,” someone laughs. “I’m totally in.”

Her scent hits me unexpectedly and my breathing accelerates. I turn my gaze as I watch her holding a tray with two other maids, helping serve out drinks to the bystanders. She’s always been beautiful in my eyes, but I can tell as she’s been getting older, that she’s going to stop my heart one day.

She doesn’t wear dresses often, so I can tell she feels awkward, but she plays her part well. Even when she smiles at my dad, I can tell it’s forced, but it lights up her eyes just the same, playing her role as a royal.

I used to stare at her for hours, trying to memorize every detail about her. That obsession got even worse the older I got. I even started dabbling with sketching in my journals. The one she got me before my shift, I’ve only used for important moments- our first kiss, my memory of that night, my apology for hurting her…… when she shifts, I’m going to gift it to her to let her know that she’s always been on my mind, even after pushing her away.

I start getting entranced by her dark hair. Even with her long hair in a ponytail, her soft curls sway against her back. Each wave seems perfectly in pl-

A long whistle lets out. “Whoa, who’s that girl?” a guy says to my right.

Orion responds before I can. “You serious? You don’t know the princess when you see her?”

“That is Princess Alina? Holy s**t! Please tell me she’s coming to the dance tonight...”

“She’s like 13 dude.” Almost 15, I want to say. Doesn’t make it any where closer to having her wolf though..

“I’m not trying to hook up man. But she’s a looker. Definitely want to dance.” My fists natural clench as my gut churns. Control your anger. I can’t have jealousy control my w-

“Yea, give her a couple of years, and I’d bang her. If she’s going to look anything like her mo-“

I pick up James by the throat with red bleeding through my vision. I can feel my wolf attempt to surface as I throw him on the ground and hold him there, snarling right into his face. “SAY THAT ONE. MORE. TIME,” I growl out. I watch with excitement as the fear grows in his eyes. My claws start to break through and sink into his skin. Multiple sets of arms grab me and noises come out of me that I’ve never heard before as they try to rip me away from my prey.

“Stand down!” But I don’t. I want to see him bleed. “Caden, stand down NOW!”

I still have an intense scowl on my face as dad grabs a hold of my shoulders and twists me to face him to read my face. James scrambles up, looking afraid as he should be. “Dude, he’s the alphas future beta, shouldn’t have said anything, you idiot.”

Once my vision clears, everything starts to crash in my mind, and my hands subtly shake from the adrenaline. Why is everything like this? Why does it have to be this hard? I shouldn’t have to feel like this- this lost and distant, especially when it comes to Alina. Everyone should know she’s my mate and our only obstacle should be her dad, trying to separate us once she turns 16. As the sting of frustration tears form, my dad’s stern look breaks just a smidgen, but I don’t want his pity.

I shrug out of the hold I’m still in, turn, and head towards the forest.

“Caden…” her soft, beautiful voice whispers as she attempts to walk with me. She’s the only one that can make me feel better, but I can’t even have that.

“Not now, Alina,” I grit out harshly, trying to mask the shakiness that I can’t even talk right now. When she stops, I can feel her sadness, and a tear goes down my face. I start to run, then sprint into the forest, leaving everything behind.

Once I know I’m alone, I strip out of my clothes and shift into the beast I can’t stand. My wolf knows how I feel about being the smallest, the weakest, and he hates it too. Dad said to give it time, but it’s been over a year, and I can still feel the weakness in my limbs as I speed around the trees.

I’m a f*****g joke.

I stop in a clearing, wishing I could go to the falls where Alina would be. If just for a moment, we could escape from everything where it’s just me and her…. but that won’t happen.

Care to tell me what that was all about, dad says, his wolf’s domineering presences looming over me.

I shut my eyes then open them, turning to face him. It was stupid. Let my emotions get the best of me. My dad hasn’t changed since my shift. He’s always pushing me, celebrating my victories and helping me learn from my loses, but it’s so hard to look at him in the eye, knowing I’m a failure in ranks. I’m supposed to be a beta, hell, a gamma at least, but no. I’m nothing.

Caden… son… When it comes to A-

Hey Caden! A couple of wolves come through the clearing, matching my coloring and similar sizing. James is an asshole.

Yea, we’ve even told him if he steps out of line again, we would tell his dad to take him home. That shut him up good.

None of that makes me feel any better.

My dad nudges me. We’ll talk later. The others bow down to him as he leaves us alone.

Sorry guys. Thanks for pulling me back.

Hey, no sweat!

Yea, he should have never joked about the princess like that. It’s hard to remember you’re like, really close with the family. Somehow that makes me feel even worse, pointing out that my wolf is inferior to what my social station is.

What you need is some fun, and I got a whole bottle of fun in my room. What do ya say?

Maybe I do need to forget, even if it’s for a moment, that my life is s**t. I can start worrying again tomorrow.