Hearts Of Nepal Collection

Chapter 9

Michelle pulled onto the 417 and headed west for Ottawa. Her father’s birthday was tomorrow and her extended family was getting together at her brother’s newly acquired camp on Lac à la Perdrix. As she fell in line with the weekend traffic heading into town, she ruminated about the inevitable conversation she was going to have with her brother. He’d been relentless about her moving north—pressing her to make a decision. She’d have a brand-new house with no mortgage, be close to her nieces and nephews, spend weekends at the lake, share holidays with family and friends, and do things with Dad.

He’d also sent her a gazillion shots of the log cabin chalet on the shores of the lake buried deep in the southern end of Laurentides National Forest. He said there were all sorts of trails she and the kids could hike and snowshoe on. And last but not least, he had connections and could get her whatever job she would like at Mannington. He was throwing it all out there.

Typical Charles J. LeConte modus operandi!

She couldn’t deny she was tempted by the offer—who wouldn’t be—but her life was rooted in Cornwall. She had a best friend there who’d stood by her when the world turned into a mess, a job she liked that kept her sane on days she wanted to get in a car and drive until she ran out of road. But even then, leaving had never been an option. Not really. Not with her mother and Adam lying in Woodhaven Cemetery, gone forever but never forgotten. She knew someday she’d move on and maybe end up someplace new, but not now. It was still too soon.

She wished CJ could understand that. Yet she could appreciate his wanting family around. They were young when their mother died, and they dealt with it in separate ways. Michelle had been fifteen when it happened, and even though she was a year younger than her brother, she’d tried to take on the role of a big sister. But CJ was running with a bad crowd, breaking into houses, looking for d**g money. It took all of their father’s pull with law enforcement contacts to keep him out of Laurencrest.

Eventually things came to a head and CJ was found unconscious and near death from hypothermia in the park outside of town. He’d OD’d on a bad hit of h****n. That had been the turning point.

Six years later, he graduated from the University of Toronto. Six months after that, he landed a junior management position at the Mannington Lumber Corporate office in Ottawa. By the time he was thirty-two, he was vice president of the eastern region and a welcome guest at the Mannington mansion.

That was where he met Monica, the daughter of Edward Mannington. Once he married into the prestigious family, he lacked for nothing. He would never admit it, but Michelle knew his worst fear was that his past would catch up to him. Perhaps that was the reason he’d brought their ailing father to live with them and now wanted her there, too. It was all about circling the wagons in case everything went to hell. Michelle shook her head, pitying him and turned the radio on.

Ten minutes later, she was tapping her fingers on the steering wheel to the beat of Katy Perry’s “Roar.” The song was one of Cam’s favorites. As she sang along with Katy’s driving voice, Cam’s suggestion of getting out there echoed in her thoughts.

.Cam was right, but she just couldn’t see herself going through a long line of dates looking for Mr. Right. And as far as money went…well, she was managing financially—albeit paycheck-to-paycheck. She was quite certain if she was in a tight spot, her boss, Don, would step up to the plate and float her a loan. She’d been with Tyler Construction going on eighteen years now and had become an invaluable member of their little family. At least that’s what Don had told her time and again since Adam had died. She attributed that sentiment to the big marshmallow wanting to brighten her world after it had crashed down around her.

Yet, sometimes he looked at her in a way that made her feel he wanted more. She shrugged it off. He was just concerned about her, worried about her being alone. She smiled as she thought of the suggestion he’d made last week about her getting a dog. But a dog deserved to be a priority, not a means to an end because you were lonely.

She arrived in Ottawa around noon, turned north onto the Montée p******t Highway and drove into the vast Laurentides National Forest. As the towering maple woods and sparkling lakes passed by, she understood what had lured her brother here. It was like entering another world, apart from the busy city life.

She rolled her window down and let the resinous scents pour in around her until she came to a twisting forest lane that led to Lac à la Perdrix. She turned left and ten minutes later, she pulled up in front of a gated entrance. She read the name on the metal plaque attached to the wrought iron bars bent together and splayed out on top like the crown of a tree.

LES MAPLES.

She pulled her cell phone out. “I’m here,” she said.

A moment later, the gate swung back and she drove down a narrow, paved driveway that bent around the trees and snaked through the secluded wooded estate. As she went, flowering purple and white crocus lifted their heads to her on the side of the road. Beyond them, in the deepening understory, sprouting green ferns and seedling trees reached up to catch the splintered sunlight raining down. The only sign of the human hand, save for the road, were the wrought iron poles with decorative lantern heads passing by in forty-meter intervals. Michelle grinned in amusement as she motored along at a leisurely thirty KPH, trying to imagine what was waiting for her at the end of this dreamy Kinkade-like painted lane.

The prime real estate reeked of Mannington money.

The road took a sharp bend to the right and swung back on itself for some time until at last, the trees parted and the chalet came into view. She stopped her car and gazed at it in wonder, taking in the massive two-story rustic log structure sitting amongst a triad of towering spruce. The pictures her brother sent her didn’t do justice to the size of it.

“Well, you certainly spared no expense here,” Michelle muttered as she drank in the expansive wrap-around porch facing the lake. She turned the car off and got out as the front door of the camp opened and her niece came spilling out with her nephew trailing behind. Michelle took a deep breath and braced herself. She loved her brother’s children, but after Adam had died, they reminded her of all she’d lost.

“Tantie M, Tantie M,” her niece, Kate, squealed as she ran up to her and wrapped her arms around Michelle’s legs. “You’re here, you’re here.”

Michelle smiled as she looked down at the wiry six-year-old girl whose long, dark brown hair had been pulled back into a ponytail. Although it had only been four months since she’d last seen her, Kate had seemingly spurted up another inch.

“Yes, I am, and I’m so happy to see you,” Michelle said, then turned to her nephew, who’d come loafing up from behind. She eyed the reserved young man who considered himself older than his eight years of age.

“Hi William,” she said, careful not to call him the nickname he hated.

The boy pushed his dark-rimmed glasses up onto the bridge of his freckled nose and shot her a diffident smile. “Bonjour Tante Michelle.”

Oh, William, you’re way too young to be so serious.

Oh, William, you’re way too young to be so serious.“Well, are you just going to stand there, or are you going to give me a hug?”

William shrugged, then finally joined his sister and stepped into her arms. As he did, Michelle closed her eyes and held the children tight to her breast until she could bear it no more.

Kate grabbed her hand as CJ came out of the front door. “You wanna see our new camp?”

“I sure do,” Michelle said as CJ walked up wearing khakis and a forest green Mannington Company shirt with a monogramed yellow M on the left breast pocket. She pulled her brother into a hug. “Quite a shack you got here, or should I say a hotel? You could host half of Ottawa here.”

CJ shot her one of his winning smiles and laughed. “Oh, I don’t know about that, but it has lots of room for family.” He let go of her, gave her a knowing look, then added, “How was the trip?”

Yes, CJ, I get the hint.

Yes, CJ, I get the hint.“It was okay.”

“Good, good,” he said. “Well, let’s get you inside and settled. I’m sure you’re anxious to see Papa.”

“Always. How is he?”

“Excited to see you,” CJ said. He looked off and she could see him turning something over in his head. Finally, he turned back. “You know, you should phone him more often.”

Michelle came to a halt and bristled. “Are we really going to do this right now…in front of…” She glanced down at the kids who were looking up at them.

He shrugged. “Just saying, is all.”

“Right,” Michelle said. How often she called her father, which was plenty, was none of his business nor was she going to be held to his appointed schedule. She shook her head. “Let me get my bag,” she said, prying her hand away from Kate. When the little girl frowned, she turned to her. “Auntie M needs to get her stuff, honey.”

She opened her trunk as her heart thumped and stared down at her overnight bag. This was not a good start to the weekend, and she was sure it was going to go downhill from here. But it was her father’s birthday, and she wasn’t going to be the one to ruin it. Collecting herself, she pasted a smile on and pulled her bag out.

“Okay, I’m ready for the grand tour,” she announced to the kids as she shut the trunk and joined her brother, following the kids across the paved drive. As they walked side by side, she looked out over the sparkling deep blue lake lapping against the rocky shoreline. With the exception of a few canoes, not a boat could be seen anywhere, which surprised her, seeing how the sun was shining down from a clear blue sky.

“Looks like everyone is out on holiday,” she said in the awkward silence between them.

“How’s that?” CJ said, looking straight ahead.

She watched the kids race into the house, letting everyone inside know she’d arrived. “Well, there’s hardly anyone out on the lake. Beautiful day like today, I would think people would be out waterskiing or something.”

CJ shot her a thin smile as he stepped up onto the porch. “You’d think so, except motorboats are banned from the lake. Keeps things quiet the way I like it. One of the reasons I bought here.” He opened the front door and waved her in ahead of him.

“Bienvenue chez Les Maples.”

Bienvenue chezLes MaplesLouis, or Sparks LeConte as her father was affectionately called by those he’d commanded in the fire department, was turning seventy-five tomorrow. He met Michelle at the door and drew her into his arms after she set her bag down. Michelle lingered in his embrace for a moment, then pulled back and looked up into her father’s soft slate gray eyes.

Sparks“How’s my pearl?” he said.

“I’m good, Dad,” Michelle answered as CJ stood nearby. “How are you feeling?”

“Right now, perfect,” he said with a wink. He tilted his head toward the cavernous Great Room behind him. “What’d’ya think of all this?”

Michelle took in the sunlit great room with its large fieldstone fireplace anchoring the far end. The room, which was modestly furnished with Mission-style furniture and a large leather sectional couch, could contain most of her home’s entire downstairs. She eyed the family heirloom Oriental rug that stretched over a polished oak plank floor, and the oil painting of the St. Lawrence River at sunset that hung over the wooden mantel crowning the hearth. Her grandmother on her mother’s side was a talented woman and had painted it shortly after she’d come to Cornwall back in the twenties. The muted slate blue and tan traditional Kashan rug had been brought back from Turkey by her uncle after WWII.

The kids came running back into the room with Monica trailing behind wearing a cream-colored cashmere sweater, designer jeans, and a pair of Prada heels. Michelle stifled the urge to roll her eyes as she watched the woman saunter in as if she walked on water.

“Bonjour Michelle,” Monica said as she joined them. She smiled and gave Michelle one of her practiced arms-length hugs. As she did so, Michelle inhaled a subtle whiff of jasmine, vanilla and tonka bean. “How was your drive?”

“It was good,” Michelle said. Kate tugged at Michelle’s shirt and she looked down at her niece. “What, honey?”

“I made you a picture. You want to come see it?”

“Kate, what have I told you about interrupting people?” Monica said.

The girl frowned and bowed her head. “I’m sorry, Momma.”

“It’s okay. She’s just excited,” Michelle said. Kate had a budding talent for drawing, no doubt inherited from her great-grandmother. “I’d love to, right after I get settled in.”

Louis took the cue and scooped the little girl up in his arms. “How about you help your grand-père out in the kitchen, hmm? You, too, William.”

As the kids went with her father, Michelle nodded toward the fireplace. “This place is amazing.”

Monica glanced at the room nonchalantly. “We like it well enough. But you must be exhausted. Here, come and sit,” she said, leading the way toward the couch.

“Actually, I’d like to get to my room and freshen up if that’s all right,” Michelle said.

“But of course. Then you must come down and join us,” Monica said. She turned to her husband. “CJ, why don’t you show your sœur to her room? I believe there are fresh towels in the closet, too.”

sœurAfter lunch, they all sat around the dining room table chatting about the comings and goings of their lives as the kids played in their rooms. Dominating the conversation was the designer line of clothing Monica was going to start in the fall, and CJ heading the new expansion of Mannington Lumber into the lower forty-eight. As her brother spieled off the details of the new state-of-the-art lumber mill, Michelle felt like an outsider in her own family. Her world was so far out of orbit with theirs, she might as well have been living on the moon.

She eyed her father sitting across from her from time to time, wondering what he thought of this new world he’d been injected into. Her father had always been a man of modest means and needs. Certainly, living in his son’s world—albeit in the attached apartment to the sprawling estate in Gatineau Park—had to overwhelm him. He traded a few glances with her, giving her the impression he felt the same way she did. Yet, she knew he was proud of his son. CJ had come a long way from where he’d started after their mom died.

The conversation drifted back and forth, from her job to the kids and all the extra-curricular events they were involved with. William had finished the school year with straight As and had joined a local junior chess club while Kate was taking art and dance classes. Finally, the topic of future plans came up.

CJ turned to Michelle from where he sat at the head of the table. “So what’s on your plate this summer?

Already, CJ? Fine!

Already, CJ? Fine!“Getting ready for a trip. Cam and I are going abroad.”

Eyebrows flew up around the table. Monica, who sat beside her, said, “Really? Where? I know some wonderful hotels in Paris and London. I’d be more than willing to look into them for you.”

Michelle eyed her father and turned back to Monica with a defiant smile. “Thanks, but I’m going to Nepal.”

Silence.

CJ leaned forward and his jaw dropped. Finally, he said, “You’re going where?”

“Nepal. Cam and I are going to Mount Annapurna. It was on Adam’s bucket list,” Michelle said, pushing her plate away. She glanced at her father, hoping he wouldn’t be against it. He stared back at her with an enigmatic expression but remained silent.

CJ sat back and cleared his throat. “Let me get this straight, ‘Chelle. You’re going halfway around the world to a Goddamned mountain. A third-world country, at that! Who came up with this harebrained plan? No, wait…let me guess. Cam?”

Monica shot a searing glare down the table. “Language, CJ!”

He pressed his lips together. “Pardon, Mon, but this is crazy.” He turned back to Michelle. “You need to think this through, ‘Chelle. If Cam wants to go there, that’s fine. She’s always been a bit of a vagabond. But you—”

“Shut up,” Michelle barked back, glaring at him. Even though she’d half expected CJ’s objection, she hadn’t expected the fierce recoil in her body. “And it’s not a harebrained plan, nor is it up for debate, Charles. I’m doing this.”

“Matter of opinion,” CJ snapped.

“Your opinion, not mine,” Michelle fired back.

CJ took a deep breath, shook his head, and turned to their father as if looking for support. But Louis just sat there and said nothing for a moment until Michelle noticed a subtle upturn on his lips.

He’s happy for me!

He’s happy for me!She relaxed and smiled at her father. “We’ll be with a group, and there’s a guide with us at all times. We’ve done our research on this, Dad, so don’t worry. We’ll be fine.”

Monica leaned into her. “Well, I say, go for it.”

Michelle blinked as she watched her sister-in-law give her brother one of her famous the-subject-is-closed expressions. Of all the people she thought would come to her defense, Monica was the least expected.

Michelle and her father sat on the porch with wine glasses in hand, watching the sunset over the lake. She looked out over the still-dark waters mirroring the deepening blue sky above and watched a pair of mallards skim over the surface before plowing in for a landing. The sound of the distant splash traveled across the lake and tumbled over the soft murmuring of the TV inside. She pulled her sweater tighter around her, warding off the cool evening breeze and soaked in the honeyed scent of the flowerbeds.

Her father set his wine glass down, stretched his legs out in front of him and cleared his throat. “This is nice.”

“Yes, it is,” she answered and sipped her wine. “That was quite a dinner. I don’t think I could eat another bite.”

“Your frère is quite a cook when he puts his mind to it.” He was quiet a moment, then said, “CJ means well.”

“I know he does,” Michelle said and crossed her legs.

“He’s just concerned,” her father said.

“And I appreciate that,” Michelle said, knowing it had more to do with CJ judging her choices. Part of her couldn’t help wanting to remind her brother about his own past decision making, back when he’d put their father and her through hell, but that was childish and would do no one any good. She drained her wine glass and set it down beside her. At length, she said, “So, what do you think about my going? You were pretty quiet at dinner.”

Her father rubbed his neck. “I don’t think it matters what I think. If it’s something that’s important to you, then do it.”

“Adam would want this for me, I think,” Michelle said, eyeing him.

He shot her a knowing smile. “I know. Just be careful.”

Michelle extended her hand toward him and when he took it, she said, “I will.” She looked back out over the water, trying to decide if she should bring up the subject of CJ wanting her to move. She knew her father would love having her close by. The question became, would he remain neutral when CJ eventually brought it up? Finally, she said, “CJ wants me to move to Ottawa.”

“Oui, I know.”

“I’m not ready.”

Her father squeezed her hand and let go of it. “You do what you think is best.” He took his glass up, drank the last of his wine, and got up. “I’m going in for a refill. Can I get you another?”

Michelle looked up at him. He was smiling down at her with one of his patented I-love-you expressions, which crinkled his careworn face and softened his eyes. “Yes, I would love another. And Papa?”

“Oui?”

“I love you.”

He took her glass and as he went to go inside, CJ came out the door with a tumbler in hand. “Hope I’m not late to the party,” he said.

“No, just going in for refills,” Louis said. He ducked inside and left them alone.

CJ strode up to the railing and peered off into the darkening sky that was just being pricked by stars. Michelle got up and joined him. “Good job on dinner. The steaks were awesome.”

“Thanks.” He took a sip of his drink. “Nice here, isn’t it?”

“Yes, it is.”

He pointed to a jut of land wading out into the lake far off to their left. “There’s a pretty little cove behind those trees about a kilometer down the trail at the west end of our property. Maybe tomorrow morning you’d like to take a walk over with the kids.” He took another sip of his drink, glanced at her and said, “So…have you given any thought to my offer?”

Michelle closed her eyes.

Here we go.

Here we go.She took a deep breath and looked up at him. “Oui.”

“And?”

“I’m going to pass for now, CJ.”

He shook his head and glanced back at the front door. “You know he isn’t going to be around forever.”

he“I’m well aware of that,” Michelle said. “And it’s not like I said never. But right now, I’m just not ready to make that kind of a move. Papa understands, why can’t you?”

“Right,” CJ scoffed. He downed the rest of his drink and stiffened his shoulders. “Papa doesn’t say anything because he doesn’t want to press you, but down inside, he wants you here. Believe it!” He looked away then turned back. “You know, it’s about time you start thinking about others beside yourself, ‘Chelle. He needs you close by, not 200 kilometers away. Time to get off the pity party.”

Michelle stiffened. “Pity party?”

CJ set his jaw. “You know what I’m talking about.”

Just then, her father came back out. Michelle had all she could do to hold her anger from spilling out as he joined them at the railing. He handed Michelle her glass of wine and placed his hand firmly on CJ’s shoulder. Leveling a back-off-and-let-it-be gaze at his son, he said, “Ah, it’s good to have the two most important people in my life here beside me. A toast…to family get-togethers, and birthdays. May there always be plenty of them.”

“Happy birthday, Papa,” Michelle said, fairly sure he’d heard them arguing.

CJ straightened his shoulders and nodded. “Oui, Papa, may there be many more.”

The following morning, Michelle took the kids for a walk out to the cove her brother had pointed out the night before. As she walked along the shady wooded trail, she ruminated on the comment CJ had made the night before. She wasn’t on a pity party. She’d lost her husband forever. How dare he minimize how she felt! Still, there was a small part of her that wondered if there was some truth to what he’d said.

When would the ache in her heart become bearable? And what if it went away completely? What would that say about her?

That she’d moved on and forgotten him?

She couldn’t even imagine that happening, but she wondered what it might look like years from now, after the visceral memories had faded to echoed whispers.

look“Tantie M, look,” Katie cried, pointing to a disturbance out in the water a short distance from shore. “It’s a beaver.”

Michelle came to herself and strode up beside her niece and nephew, who were standing at the water’s edge. She watched the animal do a barrel roll and come up a few meters away. “I think that’s an otter, honey,” she said, noting its slender body and graceful antics.

They watched the animal play around for a few moments before it finally slipped away into the water’s depths. Katie said, “Do you think she has babies?”

“I don’t know,” Michelle said. “Maybe.”

William said, “I saw on TV otters can stay underwater for up to five minutes.”

“That’s a long time,” Michelle said taking Katie’s hand. “Well, come on. We still have a ways to go to the cove, and we don’t want to be late for your grand-père’s birthday party.”

They turned away from the water and followed the footpath meandering through the wooded land surrounding the lake. As they walked under the leafy canopy, Michelle saw delicate golden honeysuckle flowers and purple touch-me-nots among the lacy fern, which Katie ran out to take a closer look at.

But William kept his eyes to the ground as he walked along the edge of the path, looking for little creatures among the leaf litter. As she watched the kids explore their world, she battled the surging reminder of things that would never be.

Katie came back with a handful of flowers and a shining smile on her little round face. Holding them up to her, she said, “I picked these for you, Tantie M.”

Michelle looked down at her niece then smiled and dropped to a knee to take the hastily arranged bouquet of touch-me-nots. “For me?”

“Oui! You’re my favorite tante in the whole world. I can’t wait until we’re all together all the time.”

Just great, CJ! You had to promise them things you had no business promising. Now I’m going to look like the bad guy. Thanks a lot!

Just great, CJ! You had to promise them things you had no business promising. Now I’m going to look like the bad guy. Thanks a lot!“Why, these are so beautiful. Merci, Katie. I’ll put them in water as soon as we get back.”

“I’m gonna get some for my mère now,” Katie announced, and ran back off to get more.

When Katie was out of earshot, William said, “Why don’t you want to come live in Ottawa?”

Michelle blinked. What? “Where did you hear that?” she said, stifling the sudden heat in her voice.

What? “Last night I heard Papa tell my mère you didn’t want to move to Ottawa. Don’t you want to be a family? I know we’re not the same as…”

“William,” Michelle said, pulling him to her and hugging him fiercely, “Of course I want to be a family. It’s just not a good time for me to move right now. There are things your tante needs to work through.”

She felt William’s hands tighten around her. “Okay, Tante Michelle. Maybe when you come back from Nepal you will have worked through them and feel better and be happy.”

Michelle pulled back from William, disheartened, and studied his somber expression as he looked back at her. Was she giving people the impression she was depressed? “William, do you think I’m sad?”

He shrugged. “Sometimes. You never laugh like you used to before…you know.”

His words sank into Michelle and gathered at the pit of her stomach. He was right. She hadn’t heard the cheerful, carefree giggle that came from deep inside her in a long, long time. At last she ruffled his hair playfully and said, “Then I shall have to work on that.” She forced a smile. “Do you remember the game we used to play when you were little?”

“You mean the ‘sounds-like’ game?”

“Oui. You say a word and I come up with a word that sounds like it, then you come up with a word that sounds like the word I said.”

He smiled, and it lit up Michelle’s heart. “Okay.”

“You start,” Michelle said, taking his hand and starting off. She called Katie back to them and ten minutes later, they were deep into the game, giggling and laughing as they wandered down the path.