Promises

Chapter 3-1

Chapter 3

Sebastian swallowed and resisted the urge to pinch the bridge of his nose and rub his face. Where the hell did he begin? He took another sip of the vile weak tea. Christ, but he needed a brandy. The mortification at having been dispatched to the country to stay with a man he had never met made him sweat, and on top of that, arriving in such a state still made his stomach churn with embarrassment. Airing his dispute with his brother, and the details of his own pathetic life was the last thing he wanted to do, but his behaviour made him feel honour bound.

He stifled a sigh and took a breath. “I have…overindulged a little of late. I’d like to enlist in the army, and I have petitioned my brother to persuade my father to purchase me a commission, but I have met with some resistance.” He cleared his throat. “Apparently, Eddie feels that a month in the country with you will dissuade me.”

He looked at the man sat opposite him. Tall, reed thin, with a sharp features and severely short dark hair. The harshness of his face was offset by large, watchful grey eyes behind wire rimmed spectacles. He looked like he had never laughed in his life.

Hawkins nodded and moved his teacup, settling it more securely in the saucer. “Given what your brother and I faced in Portugal, I can understand his reluctance. It’s a brutal business.”

“He said you fought together.”

Hawkins looked up, pinning him with that grey gaze. “He saved my life.”

“He’s the best of brothers.” It was true. In the general way of things, he and Eddie rubbed along famously. It was only this damned resistance to his following in his footsteps that had set them at odds.

“I am making a presumption that he has attempted to dissuade you by describing life as a soldier?”

“In great detail.” Sebastian’s stomach tensed as he recalled what his brother had told him.

“Then there is no point in me going over old ground.”

“Not really.”

Hawkins tilted his head to one side. “What interests do you have?”

“Interests?” Sebastian was surprised at the change of topic and felt instantly uncomfortable.

“Interests. What would you like to do whilst you are here?”

He could only shrug. He didn’t have much in the way of interests outside drinking, playing cards, and getting into scrapes. That was why it was time to attempt something serious. Something that would make his father and brother proud.

“I have an extensive library, particularly around military history. Perhaps you would like to undertake some study in preparation?”

Sebastian found it hard not to flinch visibly. “No, thank you.”

Hawkins was watching him closely. “I’m led to believe that you were sent down from Oxford?”

Sebastian nodded tersely. This was not a topic he wanted to pursue either.

“Have you travelled much?”

“No. The war on the continent made that difficult.”

“Do you have an interest in art?”

Sebastian shook his head, his jaw clenching tighter.

“Music?”

Sebastian wondered if the ground might be persuaded to just open and swallow him, but it remained stubbornly firm. He forced a smile as he shook his head. “Not really.”

Silence ticked between them. Sebastian knew he should make an attempt at conversation, knew he should be gracious, but…He sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose for a moment before replying. “Captain Hawkins, please accept my apologies. I’m not very good company at the moment. I’ve the devil’s own head, my brother seems hell bent on rusticating me, and…” He threw up his hands.

Hawkins just regarded him dispassionately. “I presume your brother holds the purse strings?”

He nodded. “My father cut off my allowance.” It still stung. He hadn’t had anything to do with his father in months.

“Has it occurred to you to make your own money so that you can be in control of your own destiny instead of waiting for someone to purchase it for you?”

Well, wasn’t that just a slap in the face? Sebastian stared at Hawkins, whose demeanour had not shifted one jot. As if he hadn’t just delivered the most stinging of insults.

“Forgive me if I sound blunt, but it would solve your problems, would it not?”

Sebastian took a long slow breath and grit his teeth. “No doubt.”

Hawkins watched him for a moment and then gestured to the teapot. “More tea?”

“I’d prefer a brandy if you have it.”

“I do not keep spirits in the house, I’m afraid.”

“None at all?”

“None at all.”

Sebastian felt his head might explode. Why in God’s name had he agreed to this ridiculous plan? Why? And why did Hawkins have to have that still, silent, superior schoolmaster air about him together with those ridiculously gorgeous grey eyes that made his heart thump. He risked a glance at him and sighed. Christ, but he was a mess. As if his current predicament wasn’t enough, it seemed that his fantasies about schoolmasters were hell bent on pursuing him into adulthood.