I sigh and rub my hand down my face. When I look up again, my mom is getting up from the couch and walking away. She's always been good about giving us privacy to have our "man talks" as she calls them. Normally, I don't care if she knows what's going on. But in this case, I'm kind of glad she leaves.
"Dad, I know how you met Mam. But…did you have to deal with groupies hanging around when you played?"
"Aiy. Even after your mother showed up they were always around. Ready for a good shag and whatever else we could think of. Rowen," I look back up at him and see concern written all over his face. "Have you gotten yerself in trouble with a cleat chaser?"
"No! Ohmygod, Dadaí," I say, the residual brogue bleeding through my words like it always does when he says something that surprises or shocks me. "Yer such an ass. You've preached to me since I was born about how I'm not to give it up to just anyone. It's gonna take someone special to get in these pants."
He chuckles. "I know ye aren't as experienced as some, but I also know how the women can be. When they have their eyes set on someone, they can be relentless."
"Da. I'm serious. You don't have to worry about me being duped. I don't plan on having my first time be with, with…" I want to finish my sentence, but if I do, that means I'm saying I don't want to be with Tiffany. But I do. And not just in the physical sense. I want to know more about her. I want to know where she works and what her hobbies are. I want to know about her family and her childhood. But knowing her status with the team seems to taint all of my questions.
"I admire you for that, boy. I have a lot of memories with a lot of groupies I wish I could take back."
My jaw drops open. "Dadaí! Are you kidding me? I thought you'd only been with Mam!"
He looks at me like I'm crazy. "Where ever did you get that idea?"
"From you!"
He snorts. "I told ye there was no feeling like being with yer wife. I know that for a fact because I've been with others, too."
"Da," I say quietly. "I…I don't know what to think about this information."
He shrugs. "Is there anything that needs to be said? Does this change the way you see me?"
"No." I shake my head and scratch the back of my neck. "It's just different than I always imagined, I guess. Maybe it changes the way I see myself."
"Listen, Rowen," he says seriously. "All that happened in the past. The minute your Mam came on the scene, it all changed. The partying wasn't fun anymore. The different women every night wasn't fun anymore. It was all about her. That's how I know the feelings are different when you have more than just a physical connection."
I nod and look at the floor. It's weird to think of my dad at a party like the one I went to last night. I can't even imagine it. But at the same time, if my dad quit going when he found the love of his life, it makes me wonder if the same thing is true of Tiffany. I mean, him sleeping with lots of women, her sleeping with lots of men. It's not really all that different, right?
"Yer thinking about that girl again, aren't ye?" A shrug is my only response.
He sighs. "Look, I don't know her. I don't know why she does what she does. It could be that she's out to trap a player. Or it could be that she just likes to have fun. All I can say is, be careful."
"I know, Da. I've kept my cherry in tact for this long. I don't think another however long is going to kill me."
He laughs. "No it won't. In fact, I'd say it's a true sign of your self control. Not many players can stay a virgin when p***y is being tossed their direction all the time. I admire ye for it. Wish I had done things differently meself."
All of a sudden, I feel even more worn out than I was. "I need to go, Da. I'm really tired." I don't want to talk about Tiffany or my own virginity anymore. It's not that it's a weird conversation to have with my dad. We've talked about stuff like this before. I'm just trying to wrap my brain around what I've just learned about his past. Maybe being attracted to someone like Tiffany isn't as big of a deal as I'm trying to make it out to be.
"Get yerself some sleep, Son," he says, not questioning my sudden desire to hang up. "Maybe they'll run one less circle around you tomorrow if you get a good night's rest, aiy?"
I smirk. "Maybe." He reaches over to press the disconnect button but I stop him. "Da?" He pauses and looks up. "Thanks."
"Love you, my boyo," he says.
"Love you, too Dadaí."
He disconnects and I'm still sitting there, looking at a black screen. For the last couple of days I've avoided thinking about Tiffany because I thought her relationship with the team made her someone my parents wouldn't approve of. Someone I shouldn't approve of. Suddenly, worrying about how her proclivities could affect a relationship with her seems ridiculous. And like judgment. And like a total double standard.
And yet, I'm still not really sure what to do about my feelings.