Atonement (#2 of the Spike pack)

Wake up

I woke up by the sound of the alarm on my watch, so I groaned, reaching up for the nightstand, where I picked it up and stopped the alarm, before slamming my watch back and groaning once more.

My head

I have a f*****g headache!

I rolled on my stomach and cupped my face in both of my hands, before I heard and felt something moving next to me. So I dropped my hands, and looked next to me, seeing that there was a freaking she-wolf in my bed, naked.

Shit

What the hell had happened again?

I had gone into the kitchen last night.

I had found a bottle of whiskey.

I had gotten drunk, which isn’t such an abnormality these days.

She… what the hell was her name again?… She had walked inside the kitchen with a friend, some other she-wolf, an Omega who worked in the kitchen of the pack house… She had joined me, one thing led to another, I didn’t even have to try that hard…I was f*****g her from behind, passed out, and here we were.

What the f**k is her name again?

SHIT

“Good morning.” She smiled at me, while all I could think of was a way to get her out of here. Out of my bed, out of my room, preferably out of the pack house as well. This had just been a quick f**k, no girl spent the night in my f*****g bed.

Who the hell did she think she was?

“I need to take a shower. You can find your way out in the meantime.” I spoke, nodding at the door, before I jumped out of bed and walked into the bathroom, not bothering to give missy-blonde-curls a second look. And by the sounds of curses and noises coming from my bedroom, which I believed was her picking up her clothes, before the door slammed after a while, she understood just fine that this had been a booty call and nothing more. And I sighed, knowing I was, once again, a free man. Like the Moon Goddess had chosen it to be. A f*****g, rejected, free man.

I took a quick shower, deciding to turn the water on ice cold, in the hopes it would wash my hangover away, before I quickly dried myself and took a pain killer from my medicine cabinet. The last couple of weeks, I had been dealing with some serious insomnia. The first few days, getting a good blowjob or a good f**k would get me tired enough to fall asleep, but that had only lasted for a little while. Now, I needed alcohol, and lots of it, to get me down. Getting myself drunk would get me to sleep, finally. But from drunken moods came lots of hangovers, and hangovers needed pain killers. It was a never ending story, but one that gave me some sort of rest at night. And it had all started after that stupid cunt Francesca had been killed, right in front of me.

Long story short, the b***h had f****d her way up the ladder until she had finally reached our former Alpha, Ash’s father, Alpha Michael. She even had the lunatic give a damn speech, where he told the pack that she would become the new Luna of the Spike pack. But that had gone south pretty fast, since that was the night that Ash had killed the fucker, and Francesca had been thrown in the cells. Ash, who was now our new Alpha, couldn’t even kill the b***h, because she claimed that she was pregnant with Alpha Michael’s baby, and Ash didn’t want to be a baby killer.

-Insomnia point one: hearing how your former mate is f*****g an Alpha, who is old enough to be your father… let’s just say, the walls were thick in the pack house, but Francesca made it her mission to let everybody know what was happening behind them…

-Insomnia point two: hearing that your old mate is pregnant by somebody else…

Now, truly, I meant it when I had accepted her rejection. I didn’t want to spend my life with someone who thought I wasn’t good enough. Because f**k, I WAS! I AM… But still… hearing this, it had hit a nerve, and it had f*****g hurt at that time.

But… Francesca being Francesca, once again, she had just been full of s**t. She had ended up lying, she had never been pregnant to begin with, she had just been saying that s**t to stay alive, or to buy herself some time to find a new excuse. My Luna, Addie, who was Alpha Ash’s true mate, was another victim of Francesca’s tyranny. Before she became Luna, Francesca had been making it her priority, to make Addie’s life a living hell inside the pack. And once the battle between Alpha Ash and his father had started, fighting for the title of Alpha and the pack lands, that b***h even had the nerve to send up two wolves to kill Addie. They had failed miserably, because that’s where Jamie and myself had come into the story, or to the rescue really. But long story short, the b***h had failed and had ended up inside a cell. When Addie wanted to talk to her, Francesca had simply pushed the wrong buttons on our Luna, and Addie had killed her on the spot. I had seen how my Luna had driven a small dagger into the stomach of my former mate, I had seen how she had bled out, how she had fallen down and how she had taken her final breath before she had turned into a corpse.

That’s when all the s**t had hit the fan, when I had had to run out, to puke my guts out, and when I had no other choice but to tell everyone who Francesca really was to me. Or who she had been to me in the past. This had always been my 'dirty little secret', the only one who ever knew about it was Jamie, and that had simply been because I had blurted it out to him in a drunken mood. I couldn’t tell Ash…especially since he already had his own demons to fight, and I didn’t want to put extra weight on his shoulders. This had been my fight, and that day, when Addie had killed Francesca, the fight was done. She was gone, Francesca was gone, forever. And from that day on, I had finally felt free.

- Insomnia point three: seeing your former mate get killed right in front of you… yup.

So… put all of those points together, and you will get zero sleep during the night. So usually, I thanked ‘Mr Walker on the black bottle’ until I would be able to forget about those memories. Those flashes of Francesca’s face, and the feelings that had soared through me at that time. The anger, the pain, the rejection. But not anymore. The only thing that stayed after her death, was my promise to her. I would never, ever think of her again, and the best way to do so was by f*****g every other she-wolf who wanted me. Which seemed to be a lot of them to be honest. And quickly they knew, Luke was the guy you needed to go and see for a good time, but nothing more, nothing serious. Luke would never settle down. Luke would never choose a mate. I wasn’t having any of that s**t anymore, nope... sorry.

I looked at myself in the mirror, as dark blue eyes stared back at me, my dark brown hair was combed back while it was still wet, and I decided that I wouldn’t shave for today, and let my morning whiskers just stay as they were. It wasn’t like I needed to look trimmed for anyone anyway. And lately, it seemed as if chicks digged a little facial hair. So, with a shrug and an inner ‘f**k it all’, I quickly got dressed into the first things I could find, before I went downstairs and into Alpha Ash’s office. Seeing that he was already there, Luna Addie was sitting on his lap, while they were sharing what seemed like a freaking passionate kiss.

As I spotted just what they were doing, I turned around quickly and cleared my throat. I heard Addie yelp behind me, and a sigh that transformed into a growl coming from my Alpha’s throat.

“Jesus Luke, don’t you know how to knock?” He groaned, to which I squeezed my eyes shut. Hoping I could burn away the images I had just witnessed from my eyes.

“Sorry, I forgot!” I excused myself, cursing in every language that I knew how to.

“Be happy that we’re not naked.” Addie laughed, as I heard her get up from Ash’s lap and walk around the desk.

“Yeah, he should be very happy, or I would have had to scratch the fucker’s eyes out.” Ash growled, clearly still not happy that I somehow had intervened in their little get-together.

“I said I’m sorry…” I reminded him, seeing how Addie walked past me and winked at me.

“All is forgiven, my friend. It is a day of celebration after all.” She grinned wide, to which I knew I finally could turn around to look at my Alpha, who was still eyeing me as if he wanted to kick my ass.

“Anything you need, Alpha?” I asked him, trying to use my puppy eyes on him. They worked wonderfully with the females. Maybe Ash wouldn’t be able to resist me as well.

“Luke, for Christ’s sake, just stop it, whatever it is you are trying to do.” Ash groaned, shaking his head, to which I laughed and sat down in my chair in front of his desk, waiting for Jamie, our Beta, to come in. And we could finally start our day as always. And a few minutes later, Jamie came walking in, looking like a freaking ray of sunshine.

“So,” Alpha Ash asked him.

“Ready for your big day?” He asked Jamie, to which he smiled wide and nodded.

“f**k yeah!” He grinned, looking at me. And I smiled back at him. Today was Jamie’s big day, the day when he and his mate Lana would have their mating ceremony. It had been a f*****g long and bumpy road for them, but they had made it this far, and I honestly couldn’t be any happier for my best friend. If anyone deserved this, it was him hands down.

“So, Addie is going to prepare the living room and transform it into a mating ceremony room, so sofas and TV's are all out etc.” Ash spoke, looking at a list in his hands.

“Did you get a master of ceremonies?” I asked Ash, who peeked up from his notes and grinned wide at me. During his own mating ceremony to Addie, it had been Jamie himself, who had done the ceremonial part, after a quick 'click and pay' to become an internet priest or whatever. But we couldn’t let Jamie do his own mating ceremony. The fucker probably would, if he had to, but we wouldn’t want to put too much shame on Lana, his mate.

“Yes, actually!” Ash nodded, placing the papers down.

“A few new pack members arrived this morning, they still have to make a blood oath to me and the pack, but one of them claimed that he actually had done this in the past.” I nodded, looking at Jamie.

“That’s great. Now we still need a doctor to come and knock on our doors and our pack is all filled up.” I grinned, feeling how Jamie smacked me against my shoulder.

“You just make sure that you behave tonight.” He spoke to me, giving me his most serious look.

“And that means keeping your pants locked until we have shifted into our wolves and have gone for a run with the pack. Tonight needs to be f*****g special for Lana, OK?” And I nodded, taking my finger as I drew an imaginary cross on my heart.

“Cross my heart and hope to die.” I grinned, seeing that it made Jamie relax on the spot.