I always look forward to my birthday, especially when I get the job 2 weeks back. I mean life was going the way I had planned it. I landed my dream job and I was going to find a flat. I usually take a long bath on my birthday, but today I don’t feel like bathing, so I’ll just take a quick shower. I walk to the bathroom, take a quick shower and I wear one of the white dresses I find in the closet. I tie my hair into an untidy ponytail. I make the bed, take a shawl and head to the couch. I’m so emotionally drained. I didn’t try harder to escape. I gave up and I feel guilty. I hope no one will call me today. I don’t feel like talking. I fall asleep as soon as my head hits the pillow.
I wake up when I’m roughly shaken by a very big and hairy hand. I rub my eyes before I open them. It’s Bova. He wants to take me shopping. I tell him I’m too tired to do anything. He can go out without me. But he wouldn’t take no for an answer. I feel so emotional right now, I didn’t want to stay awake and think of the plans I made that were ruined the day before they all came true. I say no until he gives up and leaves the room muttering the word “stubborn” under his breath. I stand from the couch to lock the door. I don’t want to be disturbed. I fell back asleep as soon as I lay back on the couch.
I woke up 5 hours later, someone was banging at the door.
“The f**k are you staring at? Go tell Bova to give me the spare key to this room, and I swear if this kid escapes I’ll kill all of you” Ayanda barks.
I decided to go open the door and save the poor people’s jobs.
“The f**k is wrong with you?” he barks. I’m not in the mood and I’m too tired. I walk over to the couch and I fall asleep while he’s talking. I was waken by a very hot slap. He slaps so hard I feel dizzy and see stars. I’m trying to push back the tears but I can’t. I try to stand but he pushes me down the sofa so roughly. I’m scared I have never been a victim of violence before.
“What are you staring at? Don’t you have anything better to do with yourselves? Do I pay you to stand around like that?” he barks at the guards standing at the door.
I’m too speechless to say anything. When he asks why I hadn’t gone out with Bova like he told me, I don’t answer him. He smacks me again so hard I fall off the couch. I can’t take this anymore. But I couldn’t scream for help. No one will come help me. So I just cry the whole time. I needed to pee, so I didn’t know what to do, whether to go ahead or tell him. Being the stubborn person that I am, I just stand and walk towards the bathroom. I lock myself inside, I pee and sit on the toilet seat long enough for him to bang on the door. When I don’t answer, he threatens to break the door, but I don’t do anything, I just sit down. And then, boom, the door was on the floor. I’m being dragged by my hair. Bova runs towards us but Ayanda punches him so hard in the nose before he can say anything. He falls on the ground with a thud. Ayanda drags me towards the steps and out of the house, leaving me there crying. I didn’t know what to do. The guards standing outside the door were staring at me with pity. I can’t believe this is happening to me.
It’s starting to get dark and chilly. I’m feeling cold so I have no choice but to ask for forgiveness even though I don’t know what I did wrong. When I approach the house, one of the guards blocks my way and shakes his head. So what now I’m not allowed inside the house? I’ll freeze to death. I tried to beg the guards. They just stare at me. I didn’t know what to do anymore, so I went to the nearest corner. They won’t understand they are wearing jackets. The corner is okay but a little chilly. I want to fall asleep so hard so that I don’t have to feel cold anymore or feel the pain in my head and face. Even though I hated home so much, I miss home and I miss my parents. No matter how annoying I get, they’d never treat me like that. Yes, my mom used to slap me a lot, but it wasn’t this bad. Actually, it felt like she was tickling me compared to that.
I’m sitting with my knees up and my chin on my knees and hands around them. I’m staring into space thinking about my dreams to escape the current situation. The door opens, Ayanda walks out with the girl he was ignoring at the mall the other day. She’s beautiful with a model-like body. She’s wearing a pink dress, heels and she’s carrying a pink bag. Maybe she’s the one who chose my wardrobe. She walks by like she doesn’t see anything wrong. If it was me I wouldn’t have done this to her, even if it meant I was going to get punished, I was still going to try and fight for her. Before I know it, I’m asleep, I’m waken up by a blowing wind. It looks like it’s going to rain. Ayanda walks by again and doesn’t look my way.
I fall asleep and wake up when the wind blows and fall asleep again. The pattern goes on until dawn. I’m still not allowed into the house and I’m so tired and hungry. It starts to rain and Ayanda appears and tells the guards to come inside, but not me. I stay there the whole morning and afternoon until his grandfather arrives and tells me to go inside the house. I don’t want to go first, even when he opens the door for me. I tell him I’ll follow. I’m so scared that Ayanda will slap me as soon as I walk inside. My face still hurts. I walk right behind him when I don’t see Ayanda. I run to my room, I take a quick bath and run to bed. I fall asleep as soon as I get under the cover.