I listened to her voicemail over and over but I didn't reply. I didn't know the first thing about making a move, especially not now that I'd seen her. I almost wished I could go back in time and be blissfully ignorant that she'd been there last night. I wished I hadn't followed her onto the beach and watched her look out to sea, wavy blonde hair catching the breeze, the silk material of her dress rippling against her curves. I wished I hadn't played the song that meant the most to me, like I was trying to speak to her on some unconscious level.
So desperate for her to turn around and know it was me.
But I was lost. When it came to relationships I was a stuttering mess, a mind tangled and muddied as a result of everything I'd been told about myself, over the years.
I wasn't a good kid. I
