Maria
Jett doesn’t seem to be bothered by it, though; he rolls his eyes and pushes his hands into his jeans.
“You have nothing to speak to Jett about, and when I tell Draven you obviously gave Lorenzo the slip and came here, he’ll make damn sure you can never do it again.” Hammer snaps at me.
“There is something I need to speak to Jett about. I wouldn’t have come here for any other reason. I know you hate me, but you don’t have to treat me like shi.t on your boot, Hammer.”
“That’s where you’re wrong.”
My shoulders sag. I can deal with people hating me; I’m used to it. But this is my brother, the brother who doesn’t have a problem with Draven. They talk, and they have dinner together sometimes. Sure, I’m there, but he doesn’t say one word to me, nor does he look at me. I don’t get this.
I’m not a drama queen, and even though my brother is now dragging me through the clubhouse by my arm, and the grip he has on me may hurt and is strong enough to leave bruises, I don’t make a sound. Everyone else behind him is yelling for him to stop, but I won’t.
Hammer rants on about me not coming here again and how he’ll tell Draven to keep me away if I so much as show my face at the gate again. Idio.t of a man.
He pushes me out of the door. I trip on my heels and land on my hands and knees on the gravel, and it’s so fuckin.g embarrassing!
There is so much yelling going on behind me that it hurts my ear, and I can’t seem to pull myself up off the ground. I close my eyes and breathe deeply while hanging my head, my hair flying around my face.
“Are you okay?” I nod my head without looking up. Nova strokes my back gently. I feel dizzy, and my knees hurt on the gravel below me. “Did he hurt you?”
“I don’t think so.” I clutch my stomach. It doesn’t hurt as such, but it’s scary to think it could all be over in a heartbeat through something like this. I have been so terrified to have this baby, but the thought of losing it kills me.
“Are you pregnant?” My eyes shoot to Nova’s. She knows without me even answering her, and she’d know she has a little girl and a little boy just a week younger than Noah. I nod my head regardless. “It’s my brothers, isn’t it? That’s why you came here to speak to him?”
Again, I nod as I drag myself to my feet.
“I swear to God, you fuckin’ idio.t!”
Watching these huge, muscle-clad grown men fighting is too much for me. Draven would never do this in front of me. Never. I’m not naïve about the fact men fight; I’ve seen it many times. But this isn’t just two random men. This is my brother and the father of my baby.
“You shouldn’t have come here,” I turn my head to Avery. She’s not the same girl I grew up with; she’s harder and more to the point. She and I aren’t as close as we once were, and that hurts me too. “Look at the trouble you’ve caused.”
“Me?”
“Yes, you. Look at the state Hammer is in. You know he doesn’t want you here, so why can’t you accept that?”
What is it about me that my brother doesn’t like?
He’s okay with Avery. Talks to her and laughs with her at dinner because she and Ghost are usually there with us. I sit there looking in on them all, Hammer, Willow, Avery, Ghost, and Draven, all laughing and having fun, and I’m always left with a pain in my heart and wondering why I don’t matter anymore.
It’s not that I’m a selfish child or anything; I just don’t understand what’s wrong with me. Why my brother hates me, and why my cousin, the girl who was always more like my sister than my cousin, has distanced herself from me.
Is there something about me that drives people away?
Have I done something to make people not like me?
Regardless, I won’t let her speak to me that way, nor will I let her blame me for this.
“So, it’s okay for you to fight for your man, but I can’t so much as come here where my own brother and cousin are? Don’t I mean anything to anyone?”
Avery was happy to see me at first, but because Hammer was angry, she was mad at me. I can’t do right for doing wrong.
It just isn’t fair. I don’t understand why he hates me the way he does. He helped Draven understand why Avery should be with Ghost. He even spends time with her and her little boy. He spends time with Draven. They’re quite close after Draven saved Willow from some jerkoff who wanted to hurt her to get at Hammer and his club.
But me?
He avoids me like the plague.
I just want to stand in the middle of an open field, shove my fingers into my hair, and scream my lungs out!
“Of course you do! God, you’re such a damn drama queen. Not everything is about you, Maria. Don’t you think it’s time to grow up?”
Wow. Just wow.
“Avery!” Nova snaps. “Don’t be such a bitc.h to your own cousin.”
Sadly, the truth is, I’m used to Avery speaking to me this way of late. She’s older than me, so she thinks she has the right to tell me what to do. She doesn’t. Maybe I let her get away with it too much. But that’s just me; I don’t like confrontation.
“It’s okay,” I all but whisper while keeping my eyes on Jett and Hammer, who are both being held back by quite a few other bikers. I didn’t even notice half of them before now.
This was a bad idea. I should have just slept with Tony, my brother’s number one, and passed the baby off as his, then none of this would have happened. My brother would have been okay with it, maybe. He would have forced me to marry Tony, but it wouldn’t have been all that bad. Sure, he’s older than me, the same age as Draven, but he’s always been good to me. But I can’t even do that now because I stupidly told Nova the truth, and there is no way she won’t say anything to Jett. Then he’ll come looking for me, and... Oh, God, Avery is right; I have created such a mess!
I can’t watch this childish behavior anymore. Why the hell men have to square up to each other and beat the shi.t out of each other is beyond me.
I’m leaving.
“I have to go.” I don’t give anyone the chance to stop me. I rush toward my car and climb in before Nova can catch me.
What the fuc.k am I supposed to do now?