The Long Lost Daughter

5 Ruby

I’m not sure what time it is by the time I eventually open my eyes. I begin tapping around my bed for my phone to figure out what time it is only to find that it is not with me. I must have left it down stairs when I came up to go to sleep. I go down stairs and find my phone on our entry table. 

It is noon the day after my birthday. I don't even know how many hours I slept. More than I have gotten in years that I am sure about. I look around the down stairs to find that Aunt Rae is not here and my eyes land on the letter sitting on the dining room table. 

The night before floods back to me like a dream. Actually I’m not sure if I would call it a dream or a nightmare. The array of emotions comes filling my mind again as all the pieces of my life are finally starting to come together. 

I will myself to not cry. I feel like I could not even cry if I wanted to because I should have no tears left. The emotion that keeps filling me is anger. I am angry that I can't have my Dad, and angry that he chose to leave. It was almost as if he thought I was not worth fighting for. I know that he says he did it for my best interest but I am still so angry at him. He does not deserve my tears no longer.

This is the second day I am missing school. Thankfully I finished all of my finals on Monday so at this point it does not even matter that I am missing these school days. I do not care enough to have these last senior activities anyways. In fact at this point I just need Sunday to come sooner so I can get the hell out of here. I don’t even care to attend graduation anymore. More than ever I can not wait to start my life in California. 

I grab the letter off the table and shove it into one of our junk drawers. Out of sight out of mind, right?

Making my way back up to my room I stand in front of the full length mirror I have leaning against the wall. My eyes are puffy, which I assume is from all the crying I did yesterday. I look like a homeless person in my baggy sweater and leggings I decide that I need a shower. Everything else I can tackle later. 

I am pleased to see that there is no scar from the gash my head received. However thinking further into that is going to lead me down the rabbit hole of being a wolf again so I push those thoughts aside for now. 

Hopping in the shower, I sigh in contentment. For just a little while it feels like I am washing the events of the last couple of days off my back. I get out of the shower and wrap a towel around my body and head and make my way back across the hall to my room. 

I decide that getting dressed and ready for the day will prepare me for what lies ahead. I ditch the leggings and hoodie that I have been wearing over the last couple of days. I chose to wear a pair of black high waisted skinny jeans, a cropped white long sleeve and my chucks. I brush out my wet hair and decide to let it air dry. I decide to put on just a little bit of makeup to help myself feel like a normal person for once. I put on some concealer, powder and mascara.

I head downstairs again just a little disappointed that Aunt Rae is not here. I need to talk to her. I am still hurt by her part in all of the knowledge I received yesterday. How could the woman who was the closest thing I have known to a Mom not tell me that I was a werewolf? She has been keeping a secret from me my whole life. I am more hurt by not knowing the truth of the last four years when it was just her and I though. 

Even though it is not her fault, I have a right to be angry. That anger is still pointed at my father though. I should be grateful that Aunt Rae has always been there, always supporting me. I can't help but be hurt by the secrets that have been kept from me my entire life though.

While looking around the kitchen for something to eat I see a note on the refrigerator.  

Penny, 

By the time I got home last night you were already asleep. I wish I could have stayed home from work today but after missing yesterday I had so much to catch up on. I did not wake you up for school figuring you needed a day to yourself. I hope that is okay. I will be home after work. 

Love, 

Your Aunty Rae 

Since Rae won't be home until later I decide to just relax for now. I relax on the couch and catch up on some of my favorite shows. I can't remember the last time I did this much nothing. I worked my ass off the last four years in high school to put me in the right place to get into the University of California. I would study all week long and even through the weekends. Now that I am done with high school and am in my dream college I do not have anything to do. 

I would just go to school to at least hang out with my teachers but I chose to let myself relax. Scrolling through my phone on the couch I am caught off guard when I hear the voice in my head once again. 

I hope you still aren't scared of me. I am sorry this is happening to you. I wish I could make it better.

Not knowing how to communicate back, I realize that the wolf can hear my thoughts. 

I am just confused about all of this. I can't say that I am excited about what is happening, but I know it is not your fault. I do have questions though. How come I did not notice I was a werewolf before? Why am I just now figuring this out?

As a werewolf you do not have the ability to shift until you turn 18 years old when you actually get your wolf. That is why you never knew about me before. You have always been a werewolf, I just did not get to make my presence known to you until now.

I have never thought that I was different, not until the day of my birthday. I mean I have always been healthy, I never got sick, I just figured I had a high metabolism.

You have a high metabolism because you are a wolf my dear. Your werewolf genes is also why you did not get as drunk as Ashley the night before your birthday. It takes a lot more alcohol to get a werewolf drunk. That is also why you healed so fast in the hospital. Since you have never had a major injury before you just never noticed.

So how does this work? Do you have a name? I mean my Dad said you were a part of me, how does this work? 

I am glad that I finally get to introduce myself. My name is Ruby. When you have your first shift you will learn what I look like. I will always have access to your thoughts. I am always here. Just as your Dad said, right now I am just a passenger in your mind.

Will you ever try to take control of me? Will you hurt me? I am trying to trust you but I am so scare of all of the unknown.

I do have the ability to take control of your mind while you are still in human form. I would have to force myself to the front of your mind. That only would happen if I get extremely angry or upset. If we push hard enough I can over take your body and force a shift as well. I will try my hardest not to do that. I know that it is my responsibility to remain hidden. Considering that it is more likely that we will never meet our mate, it is less likely my emotions will be pushed to that forceful state. Anything that has to do with our mate can bring out extreme emotions for me as your wolf.

What do you mean our mate?

The Moon Goddess about has selected a mate for every single werewolf that walks on this earth. the Moon Goddess believes will complete each other. You will have a connection to both their person and their wolf and I as your wolf will have the same. The natural reaction to finding your mate is to mate with them and mark them. A mark goes on your neck and it will let every wolf know that you are taken. You will have an inseparable bond. You will feel what the other feels and you will also be able to mind link each other. Similar to what you and I are doing right now. You will be able to communicate without speaking out loud. The connection between mates is so strong that it is common that if your mate dies, you will die as well.

Wow that is a lot of information. What kind of possessive crap is this? I don't want to be marked as someone's property. But you said we will most likely never find them? Since I am staying hidden from the werewolf world, does that mean we will never find our mate?

Most likely we will never have the opportunity to meet whoever they may be. Ruby sounds sad as she delivers this news. She has waited forever to come forward to me but now she is stuck in my body where she will never get to shift, and where she will never get her destined mate. 

I am sorry I must be a terrible human pair. Are you okay with us not finding our mate? I know I can be happy without a man, but I feel bad that Ruby will never get her other half, the one who was made just for her. 

I have no other choice but to be okay with it. This is the life your father has chosen for us so there is nothing I can do. The werewolf world is complicated and we are hidden away from humans for a reason. We are a special wolf, so it comes with even more sacrifices. Without being shown where a pack is or being brought into one we will never get to know other wolves. I may fade over time if we never get to shift or if we never find our mate. Only time will tell.

I am confused why people keep referring to me as special, but okay. I am sorry you are stuck with me. 

There is no one else I would rather be bonded with. It is you and I until the end. 

I still can not help but feel guilty. Just like everyone else in my life, Ruby is stuck with me. She won’t ever get to come out and be the wolf she was meant to be. The werewolf I was meant to be. 

With the understanding that this is my life, I make the commitment to myself that I am not going to let this stop me. I have goals and a life to live. I leave Sunday to take on my new life and I am ready. Nothing is going to hold me back. 

My Dad left and wants nothing to do with me. The sadness I used to feel about him leaving has morphed into anger. He has put not only me in a bad place but my wolf as well. I feel oddly protective of my wolf and I feel bad she will never get to have her full potential, all because he is choosing to hide me away. My Father left me when I needed him. He has always known I was a wolf and the only help I get from him is the knowledge from a letter. 

I am no longer going to let other people's choices affect my life. I am going to accept what is happening to me, pick up my life and start living it the way I want. 

I get up off of the couch and head upstairs. I begin packing up the stuff in my room. This move is the next step to the future I want to have. Nothing is going to get in my way any longer.