Solstice

Chapter Two - Charlotte

Chapter Two - CharlotteI’m not exactly crying anymore, but somehow, my eyes still leak tears down my cheeks. Michael’s body is warm against mine. “Shhh… It’s not great, Babe. We both know that. I’m disappointed too. And I do understand that it’s harder for you. But these things happen. We’ll get past it. You’ll see. We’ll try again and, in a year, maybe, you’ll be introducing Cara to her sister or brother.”

His closeness, his heat, the sweet-spicy scent of him is soothing, drawing me back to reality. “I know.” But I’m still snivelling. I swipe the back of my hand over streaming eyes and nose.

From behind us, the creak of floorboards. Michael shifts, half-turning to look over his shoulder. “James? It’s alright. Come in.”

“Master…” I don’t know what to say. The words won’t come yet.

“Charlotte?” He sits beside me, takes my tear-dampened hand and kisses the fingers.

Michael stands. “Why don’t I leave you two for a while. You can have a chat.” He brushes fingers over my cheek. “You’ll feel better for that.”

“Michael…”

But he clicks his tongue, drops me a wink. “It’s fine, Babe. You two have some time together. I’ll only be downstairs if you want me.” Stooping, he presses his lips to mine, then ambles out.

My eyes are swollen and I’m blinking to see properly. “Sorry, Master. I didn’t mean to make such a fuss. It’s just…” And a sob shakes loose from my throat before I swallow it again.

The grip on my hand tightens. “Sorry? You have nothing to apologise for. And everything to feel upset about.” He tilts up my chin, raising my eyes to his: soft, liquid, dark as a moonless night. “You look terrible, you know.”

“I know.” I’m sniffling again and drag my sleeve over my nose and eyes again.

He tuts, snagging my fingers. “That’s a very unattractive habit, you know.” Prising the fingers open, he presses something into my hand. “A lady may always ask a gentleman for the use of his handkerchief.”

Despite myself, I find myself laughing as I clean my face. “Sorry.”

“That’s better.” He draws a thumb over my cheek, wiping away under my eyes. “Your mascara’s all to hell too.”

I swipe under my eyes, drawing black streaks across the previously white linen, then wind the handkerchief tight in my fingers.

He extracts it gently from my hands. “A great improvement.” He kisses my forehead, then once more takes my fingers in his. “So, how are you feeling now?”

How do I feel?

I slump, letting out air. “A bit of a failure. I’ve let Michael down. He works so hard to make everything here perfect and…”

“That’s utter nonsense, and you know it.” Irritation crackles in his voice, but it’s soft and quickly muted.

“I’ve never failed at anything before…” It’s hard to express how I’m feeling… “… Not if I really wanted to do it.”

His tone turns crisp. “And you haven’t failed now, either. You’ve just had a setback. It happens. Come on, cheer up.” He slings an arm around my shoulder, squeezes. “It's not a disaster, just a glitch. When you’re feeling yourself again, Michael will spend another few weeks pinning your brains to the bedhead two or three times a day. Then you'll find you’re pregnant again and you'll forget this even happened.”

“Yeah… You’re right. And I will feel better, I know. But right now, I feel useless.”

He chuckles. “Charlotte, you are the least useless woman I have ever known, but you do need cheering up, I think.” He scratches an eyebrow. “With any other woman I'd say go out for the day with your mother and Beth, and I'd fund a shopping trip...”

Despite myself, I grimace...

His voice turns dry… “In your case, however, what say we go check out that new bookstore that opened up in town? Everyone can come, and we'll call it a family day out.”

“That sounds… nice…”

“Good. That’s agreed, then. So, for now… You didn’t finish your breakfast. I’ll make you something to eat, and if you want, you can have it in bed. But I thought you might like to have a soak in the hot tub. It’s a bit early, but a glass of wine might help too. We can all join you if you’d like. Or… we can leave you and Michael together if you’d prefer.”

A pale imitation of a smile flits over her face. “I’d like that, yes.”

“Richard and Beth, too?”

She sucks at her lower lip, nods.

“Fine. Come downstairs then. You can eat while I run the tub.”

*****