3.
DIAMOND:
The strongest and hardest mineral. Commonly used in engagement rings to symbolize the unbreakable bond between a man and a woman.
For the next few weeks, I spent my time job hunting. I tried to steer clear of weddings for now. I knew that I was still in pain, but acknowledging the pain didn’t really mean adding up to it or provoking it in whatever way.
But by end of the week, I still had nothing. I was still the same clueless girl I was weeks ago.
“Hang in there, sweetheart.” Nicole said to me one night we decided to check out the new bar in the city called Oil Rig. “You’ll find one. Although, you would have found one already, if you just went back to wedding planning. You were famous before. People loved your work. It would have been easy to get a job with the competition.”
I rolled my eyes. “What’s the point of planning other people’s weddings when I don’t believe in love anymore? If my own wedding is being realized by someone else?”
“Speaking of that, are you… going?” John asked.
“Hell no!” I replied quickly. “Why would I go to the wedding of my ex-fiancé and my ex-best friend? Especially if they didn’t have the decency to change a thing that I planned when I was supposed to be the bride? Geena is a classic! She stole my fiancé! And she stole my wedding ideas! She’s… a…” I sighed. “She’s a… I don’t know the word!”
“A thief?” Dannie suggested sarcastically.
“More than that! She’s a lying, stupid, conniving b***h!”
“And Bryan?”
“He’s a cheap, indecent, spineless son of a b***h! They really deserve each other!”
“Great!” Nicole clapped her hands. “We’re getting somewhere! At least now you hate him enough to admit that you need to get back at them for what they did to you.”
“How can I get back at them?” I asked.
“By showing them that you are happy,” John said. “That you’re beyond this. That you’re over him. That you’ve moved on. And you’re a lot happier now than when you were with him.”
I snorted. “Okay. So I’ll get my revenge in… five years! Tough! They won’t even remember me by then!”
“They may not even be together in five years, who knows?” Nicole muttered.
“You don’t have to be really happy. You just have to show them that you are. Even if you are still breaking inside. You don’t have to show them that. You just need to let them see that you are happy, even if you aren’t,” John said.
“You mean… for the show?”
“Yes,” Dannie said. “But the minute you start feeling better about it is the minute you will start getting over him! And you can do it, doll.”
I smiled. A new sense of excitement filled me. And for the first time in months, I felt a little lighter and little bit happier.
I raised my bottle to them. “Cheers?”
“Cheers!” they agreed and we all took a gulp of our beers.
“So, how about pawning that ring?” Dannie said. “It can get you out of Adam’s apartment.”
“Come on, sweetie. No need to hold on to it. He isn’t worth it. The memories aren’t worth the pain that came afterwards,” Nicole said.
“At least get it appraised. See how much you would get for it should you decide to cash in on Bryan’s memories.” John suggested.
“Worthless memories.” Dannie piped in.
Well, the bastard deserved it for all that he did to me. After all, he owed me for the flowers on his wedding!
The next day, I was feeling a bit more cheerful than usual. My friends were right. It was Bryan’s fault that the wedding’s off. I was the injured party. I guess it wouldn’t hurt to at least see how much the ring would be worth in case I truly decide to sell it. Besides, I couldn’t be in the charity of Adam forever. I know I was putting him in a difficult position with his family since Geena is his sister.
I met with Nicole and Dannie and we went to the mall to get the ring checked out.
“Okay, my frame of mind should be… I am over him and I have a new boyfriend,” I said, smiling dreamily.
“Hmmm… the first part is easier to believe than the second. Who is this mystery guy? Or don’t tell me you have totally sold out your values and you decided to hook up with Adam.”
I wrinkled my nose. “Adam? Eeww! Incest!”
Nicole laughed. “So who’s the man?”
I shook my head. “No one yet. But if I accidentally run into Bryan or Geena, that’s what I will tell them. It doesn’t have to be true. But I’ll raise my chin and that’s what I’ll say. I’m happy as a bird! And I’m no longer a virgin! I’ve given myself up on a steamy night of passion with my boyfriend, who I am very much in love with!”
“What’s the name of your boyfriend?” Dannie asked challengingly.
“None of their damn business,” I replied chirpily.
“Bravo!” Nicole said pulling me into the next jewelry store she saw.
I reluctantly gave my ring for appraisal at the jewelry shop. The guy at the counter gave me an apologetic smile. Instantly, he was able to deduce that it was an engagement gone sour.
“I’ll see what rate we can give you,” he said.
We waited for five minutes, looking at other rings and trinkets displayed around us. I could only heave a sigh looking at the diamond engagement rings in front of me. I must admit that Bryan’s ring, apart from the big stone, didn’t really have much style.
“Excuse me, Ma’am,” the guy finally called us.
We approached him. My heart was pounding. That ring showed how much Bryan valued me, or loved me. Pawning it didn’t say much about how much I valued him no matter what he did to me. And God knows I did value him… too much!
The guy looked at me uncomfortably. “I’m...” He took a deep breath. “I’m… sorry. But no jewelry shop will buy this.”
“What? Why?” Nicole asked.
The guy lowered his voice so that only me, Dannie and Nicole can hear him.
“Because, I’m afraid that this is a fake,” he said. “The diamond is not real.”
“What?” I asked in shock. I knew my face was turning crimson. “That can’t be!”
I picked up my ring and looked at the engraving inside to make sure that they had not switched it. It’s still there—the date that Bryan proposed to me.
“Ma’am… this is cubic zirconia. The value of which is… I don’t know… a couple of hundred at the most?”
“What?” Nicole asked, completely shocked.
“You didn’t notice?” the guy asked. “I’m afraid that even the band… was just plated.”
“I’m not a jeweler, how am I to know?” I asked sarcastically.
“I’m really sorry,” the guy said. He smiled at me ruefully.
I took my ring back. I thought I was going to faint any minute. How could I have been so stupid? He proposed to me with a fake stone? What? He really thought I was so stupid that I wouldn’t notice? That no one would notice?
How cheap did he take me for?
“Ma’am…” the guy at the counter said. “I’m really sorry.” He handed me a card. “Do come and visit us again. We’re giving you a privilege discount card which you can use on your future purchases.”
I nodded, trying to prevent tears from rolling down my cheeks. “Thanks,” I said weakly.
“Let’s go,” Dannie said to me.
I seemed to be floating mindlessly towards the exit. I wasn’t looking in any direction, wasn’t actually seeing anything when I collided with another customer who was entering the store.
I caught a whiff of sweet masculine perfume as I felt strong arms wrap around me in an iron grip, preventing me from falling flat on my butt.
Instead of pulling away from the stranger, I leaned my head on his broad shoulder and for a moment there, I felt comfort… just when I needed it the most. I held onto him and quietly let the tears seep out. Because I needed it. I needed a shoulder to cry on. Someone to hold me as I let reality slice through me. I needed someone to be strong for me at that moment when I felt the weakest… when the pain enveloped me ruthlessly.
“Are you alright, Miss?” I heard him ask, his solid chest rumbled beneath my face as he spoke.
Slowly, I turned my head upwards and found myself staring at a pair of dark sunglasses. His black bangs fell over his dark brows, one of which was raised as he stared down at me.
My mind went blank as his face and his presence filled my senses. I took in his handsome face, the sweet masculine scent of him, the hint of concern in his voice, and the feel of his arms around me.
“Are. You. Okay?” he repeated, this time louder and with more emphasis to every word.
I nodded as reality slowly returned to me.
Slowly, he released me, making sure I was steady enough to stand on my own. Then he took a step back. It was only then that I saw what he was wearing. White shirt and black leather jacket.
“Take it easy, okay?” he said. And with a final nod, he went inside the store, leaving me standing outside, still in awe.
“Okay, enough embarrassment for the day,” Dannie said, pulling me away.
“Gees, Ash. For a moment there, I thought you were going to go hysterical in that poor soul’s arms!” Nicole teased.
After walking one block with my friends, I finally snapped back to reality.
“That guy was real?” I finally asked.
“Who? Dark-haired Ken Doll?” Dannie asked back.
I nodded.
“Yeah,” Dannie replied. “And he is sooooo hoootttt!” And for a while, I thought Dannie was going to cry. “I haven’t seen him before!”
“Big city. You can’t know everybody who lives here!”
Then I remembered how his arms wrapped around me. In that instant, I felt warm, comforted… safe. I felt the comfort that I had been looking for since I found out about Bryan and Geena.
I looked at the ring that I still clasp in my hand and I remembered how Bryan made me believe his ring was real… along with his love.
I stopped in the middle of the sidewalk. I started crying again.
“It wasn’t even a real diamond!” I wailed.
“Oh, God! Here we go!” Dannie rolled his eyes and pulled me along with him and Nicole.
“Did you hear what the guy said? It was worth only a couple hundred bucks!” I continued crying. “How could he do this to me? I thought he loved me then! And this ring… this ring was the symbol of how much he valued me, that wretched son of a b***h!” And I threw the ring on the street.
“What are you doing? You could have sent it back to him to tell him that you know!” Nicole said, running after the ring.
But then a beautiful white sports car came rushing past in front of us and ran over my ring.
“Oh no!” Nicole panicked.
“Nicole! You’re going to get yourself killed! Get back over here!” Dannie shouted.
Nicole quickly crossed the street to pick up my ring… or what was left of it. True enough, the huge stone had been smashed leaving only the gold plated band.
“Thank you!” Nicole called after the car angrily.
“I don’t need it, Nicole!” I said to her. “This confirms what we already know. Just… throw it away!”
“You’ll never know. You just might see Bryan one day and make him… I don’t know… eat this!” Nicole said angrily. “How could he do this to you, Ash!? I thought… I thought you two were best friends. I thought you were soulmates.”
“Is this how cheap he thought I was?”
My friends hugged me, making me feel better. Or at least they tried.
I still couldn’t believe it even until that evening when Dannie, Nicole and I went to meet up with John at Oil Rig.
John was speechless almost the whole time. He was shaking his head as he took large gulps of his beer.
“Say something, will you?” Nicole said.
John shrugged. “I can’t really say anything except that… I thought Bryan couldn’t sink any lower!”
“A freaking cubic zirconia! He said he spent a fortune on that ring!” I said. I drank my beer. “How could he trick me like this? How couldn’t I have known? I was a wedding planner, for Christ’s sake!”
“You plan weddings, honey. Not engagement parties. Your job begins long after the ring has been placed on the bride-to-be’s finger,” Dannie pointed out.
Now I realized that for the years that we had been together, Bryan and Geena must have thought me naïve. I was this… pushover, who worshipped the ground that they both walked on… like they couldn’t do anything wrong in their lives. I did almost everything they asked me to. God! I’m such a fool!
My sorry thoughts were interrupted by a phone call from my mother.
“I… have to take this call, guys,” I said. I quickly dashed to the nearest exit of the bar and answered my phone.
“Are you okay, sweetie?”
“I’ve been better, Mom,” I replied.
“Well… I’m sure… if you’re still in touch with your cousin, Adam, your invitation has reached you by now. I know it may come as a surprise.”
“Yes! It was a shocker!!!” I muttered sarcastically.
“I know what they did to you was horrible, sweetheart,” my mother said apologetically.
“There are no words for it, Mother!” Tears instantly rolled down my cheeks but I refused to let her hear me whimper.
“But sweetheart, you and Geena… you’ve been the best of friends all your lives. I mean… you can’t really miss this one time event in her life.”
“Mom? What are you saying?” I asked her. “Are you… saying that Geena and Bryan will last forever?”
“Oh, sweetheart. You aren’t… over him yet, are you?”
“Wow, Mother! It’s only been two months since I found out that my boyfriend for years had been sleeping with my best friend for life! I’m not really made of stone, Mother!”
I heard her sigh at the other end of the line. Then she said, “This is going to be tougher than I thought.”
“What’s going to be tougher, Mom?”
She took a deep breath and then she said, “Sweetheart… we were hoping you would come.”
“Where?”
“To… the wedding.”
Right that instant, I thought I was hearing things. I could not believe what my mother just asked of me. After running what she said over and over in my head, I still thought I was hearing things.
“Mom… wha… what did you just say?”
“Sweetheart… We know that it was wrong what they did to you. But… this is our family. Geena is like a daughter to us, too. You grew up together. You were best friends all your lives. It’s tradition to have a reunion during big events in a family member’s life and Geena’s wedding is a big event. You may be mad and hurt about the whole thing, but you and Geena… you go back a long way, sweetheart. You two will kiss and make up and you will learn to forgive Bryan. You were also best friends. You would… feel sorry someday if you missed this wedding. I heard it’s going to be grand!”
“Oh Mother! I am sure it will be!” I said very sarcastically. “After all, I planned the whole thing! This was supposed to be my wedding Mother! Bryan’s and mine! The fact that you think I can get over their sleeping together behind my back, and lying to me for months so easily is unbelievable, Mom! Geena may have been my best friend all my life, but now… she’s just some b***h who broke my heart, stole my fiancé, and ruined my dream wedding!”
“Sweetheart… please. You can just show up for an hour at the reception. Say hi to your relatives. Say hi to Uncle Jack. It would mean a lot to him for you to be there.”
I sighed. Uncle Jack. He’s like a father to me. And whatever he gave Geena when we were growing up, he also gave me. Like when he went on trips and gave Geena a doll when he got back, I had the same one too. Even when we were in college, I was like a daughter to him. And I love him. But… if he loves me, wouldn’t he understand why I wouldn’t make it to Geena’s wedding?
“Sweetheart… please. If you can’t do it for Geena, please do it for Uncle Jack.”
“Mother… I’m sure, Uncle Jack would understand and forgive my absence,” I said.
There was silence on the other end of the line.
“Mother?”
“Think about it, dear. You have another three weeks.”
“Mom, it doesn’t matter if I had three years to think it over, I’m not going.” I went to hang up the phone, but one small, vindictive part of me made me raise my phone back to my lips.
“By the way Mom, Geena’s pregnant. That's how I found out about their affair.” I only listened long enough to hear my mother’s brief gasp and apology before I hung up the phone.
I still couldn’t believe it when I came back to our table.
“What? Geena has more bad news for you?” Dannie asked, quite alarmed.
I sighed. “No. But my mother does.”
“Is everything okay?”
I smiled sarcastically. “According to her, everything will be just peachy if I attend the wedding.”
They all groaned.
Nicole was almost furious. “Excuse me, I know she is your Mother, but what is she thinking? Does she not care about you at all?”
“I don’t think she understands what it feels like to be cheated on or to be forced to call off your wedding. Or to see your dream wedding happening to someone else.” Tears rolled down my cheeks.
Dannie and Nicole put their arms around me.
“Look up, sweetheart,” John said. “Better things are coming your way. But for now, you need to hold your chin up high.”
I smiled at them. “Thanks, you guys,” I whispered.
“Just make sure that if you do choose to attend that wedding, you will not be attending it alone.”
I raised my brow at John.
“Well, make sure that you go with a guy. A date. Some guy who’s ten times hotter than Bryan and can’t keep his hands off of you. We guys really hate that!”
“Really?”
He nodded. “You’ve dated Bryan longer than he’s ever dated Geena. He’s had the hots for you ever since. But he never had you… right?”
I rolled my eyes. “Of course! I’ve been holding it off until my wedding night.”
“So, somewhere in the back of his mind, he still wonders what it would have been like to have you… to touch you more intimately. And maybe he just might still have some feelings for you.”
“If he had feelings for me, he wouldn’t be marrying Geena!” I muttered.
“He’s a cheapskate, Astrid! He wanted his money back! Or make the most of it, if the r****d option was not available!” Nicole said crossly.
“It’s only been two months. He was madly in love with you for years. Chances are… he still has some feelings for you. It may not be what it used to be, but… there’s still a shred of that emotion there. And the lust thing is definitely still there because it was never satiated,” John continued.
“So, what are you saying?”
“I’m saying, show up with some guy who’s so handsome and so hot, even Bryan would want to sleep with him if he were gay. And make sure you two get too close for comfort. Send out signals that you’ve already slept with this guy.”
Dannie beamed. “That’s like a slap in the face for him, isn’t it?”
“And nobody in that wedding will ever feel sorry for you for what happened. They will think, if this is the prize you got for losing Bryan, then you were much better off,” Nicole agreed.
“Not only should he be hot, but he should be a lot more than an orthodontist,” Dannie said. “He should be a third-generation millionaire, trust-funded, Ivy League graduate.”
“Wow,” I breathed. “And what does he do for a living?”
“He should be running his family business or have investments here and there,” Nicole suggested.
“And show up in at least a Boxster,” John added. “Bryan loved cars!”
Now, I must admit that a part of me got a little bit excited about the whole thing. But then again… I’m wide awake and still sober!
“That is really great, guys! But how will I ever nail a guy like that? And in three weeks? Where will I find a guy like that?”
They all fell silent after that. Whether because they thought it was impossible for me to end up with a guy born with a silver spoon or because they thought the time limit was too short, I wasn’t sure.
I took a gulp of my beer again.
“Well?” I asked finally. “I’ve lived here for years and I haven’t met a guy like that. That’s our first problem. And guys like that only seem to go for supermodels, that’s our second problem.”
“Think positive, Ash. You could stumble upon a guy like that, you know.”
“And you have to remember, I never go for the rich and famous,” I said.
It was my thing since Kevin Moore. In my version of a fairytale romance, it’s the brave, honorable knight who took home the princess, not the spineless prince charming. The rich kids I went to school with were all bullies, with nothing to show for themselves, except for the flashy gadgets and cars that their parents gave them. I swore off guys like Kevin. He taught me not to hope that I would be enough to hold his heart or attention forever.
So I always turned down the rich jocks that attempted to ask me out after Kevin. I wasn’t impressed with their wealth. I preferred a middle class guy who was smart beyond his years, and was responsible enough to focus on long-term goals. Someone who would be loyal and would make me the center of his world.
“Bryan knows that perfectly well, too,” Nicole said.
“Well, then that might work out well for you, too,” John said. “He’ll know how much you have changed since you broke up with him. That will make sleeping with this new guy even more believable.”
I forced a smile at them.
“But… three weeks is a short notice. Even if you do find him and date him, how would you get him to be all over you in time for the wedding without giving him an impression that you’re a slut?” Dannie asked.
“I know! Love potion number nine!” I muttered sarcastically.
We sat there for a while, contemplating our scheme. I must admit that it was perfect. If I go, even for the sake of Uncle Jack, I don’t want to look like a fool at that wedding. I don’t want to be pitied. And I don’t want Bryan to think that he was better off, or Geena to think that she had taken everything away from me. I wouldn’t be able to stand the sympathetic looks of my aunts and uncles, even of my parents and grandparents. And I would especially not withstand the sneers of Geena’s friends.
Actually, thinking about all that, I wondered again, why I was contemplating going to this wedding. It would be much safer to just stay at home.
“Guys, I… I don’t think I should go at all. Why are we even discussing this?” I said to my friends. “No. I will be firm about this! I will stay at home… and sulk!”
**************
That night, I told Adam all about the ring that Bryan gave me. He didn’t even offer a reaction.
Then, I proceeded to tell him about my Mom’s phone call, persuading me to attend the wedding and my friends’ suggestion to find a date for that night.
“Your Dad would understand if I don’t go, right?” I asked him.
He shrugged. “Yeah, he would. But it would warm his heart to know that… there is hope that you will forgive Geena for what she has done to you.”
I groaned.
“But your friends are right. You should go with someone who is like a slap in the face for Bryan. Someone that Geena herself would drool over. You already know she has envied you all her life. Even though she has Bryan now, it’s still a hard habit to break. So, I suggest you show up happy to that wedding… should you choose to go, that is.”
“But Adam… how will I get a dream guy like that to fall for me in three weeks? Considering, I don’t even know where to find one!”
Adam chuckled and then he said, “Oh, little Astrid. Your soul is too good, you don’t know how to conjure evil plans, do you?”
“What?”
“Find that guy, Astrid. Smoking hot! That’s all you need to do.”
“Where?”
He shrugged. “You go out more than I do. I don’t know. In bars maybe!”
“Even if he’s smoking hot, he needs to be rich, smart, has a great career and he must be in love with me.”
Adam laughed so hard, I actually started to feel insulted.
“What, you jerk? Tell me!”
“He doesn’t have to be all that,” Adam replied. “He just needs to be from out of town and not know anyone in the city.”
“And?”
“And then you ask him to pretend he’s rich. A nice suit would do the job. As long as he’s not dumb, had a little bit of high school education, he’s good to go. Nobody in our family questions guests scientifically. Well, except for me. But I’m on your side here. So, I’ll keep my mouth shut.”
“Adam…are you insane?”
“Are you desperate?” he asked back.
I sighed and didn’t answer.
“If you can’t get him to say yes to the whole charade as a date or as a friend, pay him. I’ll lend you the money. Or better yet, I’ll pay for it myself. Whatever takes you out of this misery! Even for just a day!”
“You really are insane!” I rolled my eyes.
He shook his head and put an arm around my shoulder.
“No. Sometimes I’ve wished you really were my little sister, too.” He smiled at me encouragingly and gave me a kiss on my forehead.
I sighed and then started to head to my room. Then I looked back at Adam.
“Thank you, Adam. You’re a great brother,” I said and then I headed to my room.