Solar Eclipse - Book 5

Chapter 21

Sometime that night I fell asleep, laying beside Nic in his bed. I knew laying next to a dead body was not normal but I just couldn't find it in myself to leave his side. I was afraid that if I left his side he would disappear. I needed to be here and protect him like he protected me.

I still held onto hope that he would come back to me. Even though it was false hope it was still hope. It was still hope.

The next morning I woke up with a start. Yawning I stretched out my arms before pushing myself into a sitting position. I looked to my right and my heart dropped. The balcony doors weren't there, this wasn't my room. And if this wasn't my room that meant I was in Nic's. That meant he was dead.... yesterday happened.

I turned my head to the left to look at Nic only his body wasn't there. I jumped to my feet, my heart racing and my stomach in my butt. Where was his body. Where did he go.

"Mom! Dad!" I screamed as I stormed out of the bedroom.

I tilted my head slightly to listen for any sounds that gave away their position in the house. A shuffle downstairs was my cue. I quickly descended the staircase and went into the living room where they were standing.

"What did you do with him!" I shrieked angrily.

"Renesmee, you need to calm down. You were sick, you need to give your body a rest. Go back upstairs and sleep for a while."

"Why? So you can finish burying his body. Tell me where he's at!" I shouted, stomping my foot angrily.

"Renesmee, calm down so we can talk this out."

"I will not calm down! Nic is my life and I am in love with him." I shook my head, tears streaming down my face. "You know... he proposed to me twice since we've been together and I told him no because I wasn't ready. Then this happens and you know what I told him... I told him if we survived I would marry him. Ironic huh, how this all worked out. I wanted him only now I can't have him." I turned around and punched the wall, breaking a hole in it.

"Renesmee..." My mother was at my side. "Nic isn't here, he is gone. He-" I shoved her away not wanting to hear anymore and ran downstairs to the music room.

I couldn't believe it, he was gone.

I inhaled deeply before I let it go. I screamed as loud as I could, not caring who the hell heard me. I was so angry that I loved Nic and couldn't have him. He gave me everything he could to make me happy yet I woudln't give him the one thing that would do the same for him.

He wanted to marry me and take care of me but I said no.

Now I regret it. I knew I would be happy with him and safe as can be with him, especially now that the Volturi was gone and Aurora and her brother Flint took their rightful places back upon the thrones of Volterra.

I just wish I had another chance to make him happy.

I curled up in the corner of the music room and stared at the wall. Did I really want to live forever, especially when I felt like this. All these emotions and regrets would never leave my mind. Because I was part vampire I didn't forget as easily as humans did so no matter how many years passed by I would remember this moment.

"I love you..." I whispered, my eyes closed.

I missed his eyes, his beautiful eyes and his smile and his voice. I never knew how much I'd need him, miss him, ache for him until now.

"Renesmee?" My father called.

He crossed the room slowly and took a seat on the floor beside me.

"I don't want to talk daddy." I sobbed, before I moved my head to rest in his lap.

My father placed his hand on my shoulder. "Well then, just listen okay?"

I nodded my head. "Fine. I'll listen."

"The night the Nanook tribe got here Nic came to me to ask a favor. He wanted to ask for my permission to have your hand in marriage. Like every father in history has thought, I wanted to say no because I didn't want to acknowledge the fact that my little girl isn't so little anymore. But I knew he loved you and I could tell you loved him too so I gave him my blessing." My father finished.

"Why are you telling me this now? He's dead..." I took a rattled breath.

My father didn't respond, he got up and I listened as his footsteps carried him out of the room. I didn't bother moving at all, even though my head was in an uncomfortable position. Then the footsteps came back and he sat back down in the spot he had just vacated.

He pulled me into his lap and pressed a kiss to my cheek before he began combing his fingers through my hair.

"When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible." He spoke.

I went rigid as I heard those words... that voice.

"Nic!" I breathed, sitting up in his lap.

My body began trembling as I looked into his eyes. I ran my fingers through his hair, over his eyes, nose, lips. Then I pressed my ear to his chest, listening for his heart beat. It only took half a second and sure enough it was there.

"Oh my goodness.... Nic you are alive!" I exclaimed, throwing my arms around him. Tears began streaming down my face as I listened to his strong heart beat.

Then his arms were cradling my face and his lips were meeting mine. When he leaned away I looked into his eyes, they were beautiful, the same as I remember them if not brighter.

"How are you alive?" I asked curiously.

He brushed his thumb along my bottom lip. "Whenever my body goes through something physically traumatic like it did when I saved you it goes into a hibernation phase where I sleep until it repairs itself."

"You weren't sleeping, you weren't even breathing and your heart wasn't beating. You were dead. You should have seen your mother, she was a wreck."

"I'm alive now, Renesmee, that is all that matters."

I nodded my head. "You could've been gone forever Nic, why would you risk that to save me?"

"Before I met you, I never realized how empty my life was. Having you by my side is what completed me. So when the possibility of you dying was staring me right in the face I just couldn't bear it. I had to save you Renesmee, I just couldn't imagine a life without you in it."

He got down on one knee and pulled out a small silver antique heart shaped box. In one swift move he opened it revealing inside beautiful oval sapphire circled by small diamonds on a silver band. It was the most beautiful ring I had ever seen. Even prettier than my mothers.

"This belonged to my grandmother." He whispered to me. "It would be an honor and make me the happiest man alive if you were to wear it for all of eternity."

"I can't imagine courting you for another day." I bent down and pressed my lips gently to his. "And that's why I am saying yes." I smiled, holding out my left hand.

"I love you Renesmee."

"And I love you Nicholi."

I watched in awe as Nic took the ring from the box and slid it onto my ring finger. Then he was standing before me. I stared in awe at the beauty of the ring and how right it felt nestled on my finger. It looked like it was meant to be there.

The ring had my immeadiate attention, I didn't even realize that our family had entered the room and was clapping in congratulations to our official engagement. Only when Nic place his arm around me and pulled me to his side did I give my attention to the room.

My mother and father stood beside Anne and Charles. Both our parents had large smiles on their faces. To the right of my father stood Alice and Jasper, Alice was bouncing up and down excitedly. Rosalie, Penelope and Emmett were behind them with Carlisle and Esme to their right. Smiles were everywhere.

Now that we were engaged there was clearly only one thing left to do and that was to tie the knot. I was curious, anxious, nervous, happy, excited, shocked and in love. So many thoughts ran through my mind of the future but each one was blurred by the sight of Nic standing beside me.

I couldn't wait to be his wife. I couldn't wait to officialy go from Renesmee Carlie Cullen to Renesmee Carlie Cromwell.

This was who I was born to be.