Broken, but still Alive

I felt tears run down my face as I stood in my brother’s doorway. I watched as he threw all his belongings into bags, his movements angry and jerky. His face was set into an unfamilar scowl angry growls leaing his lips every few seconds. My brother turned 18 today and shifted for the first time and now.......he was leaving just like that. I didn’t understand what was going on. What had happen? My brother was my best friend. He had been really popular when he'd been in school. He was pretty tall and had the good looks in the family. He wore the shirt I'd gotten him for today. It'd taken me all day to find the right gift and even though it was just a shirt he'd seemed really happy when he'd opened the gift. Actually he'd seemed really happy before he'd shifted even excited. Today was suppose to be biggest day of his life, a happy day. I mean I knew the shift hurt but after that it was suppose to be amazing. I just didnt' understand. As he grabbed the watch dad gave him into his bag it really hit me. He was leaving. I felt my heart break, a sob breaking between my lips. He froze and looked at me. "Why?" I whispered tears continuing to fall down my face. I quickly wiped them away not wanting to appear like a cry baby. A pained look crossed his face and he came to me quickly wrapping me in his arms. I clung to him desperate to never let him go. "Please don’t leave me.” I whispered I felt his hands ball against my back then he was pulling away kissing the top of my head. "I love you so much Katy so much,” he whispered cupping my face. "Never forget that." "If you love me so much you wouldn’t leave!” I cried grabbing his arm. He easily shook me off his face hard. "You'll be fine without me Katy, you’re strong." "Please you’re all I have left," I sobbed. "You have mom." "She’s dead as dad! Nothing but an empty shell she doesn’t even get out of bed anymore!” I screamed. He looked at me and kissed my cheek hugging me tightly. "Goodbye Katy" Then he was zipping his bags and walking out the door and my life. I fell to the ground and cried.