I watched from my balcony as one by one our friends from school filed off the boat and onto the dock. Today was the day of our house party. We were all allowed to invite a handful of friends, I invited no one. From my spot with my perfect vision I was able to see Jamie, Allison and Prudence walking together up towards the house. Just as they passed the meadow they were greeted by Tyler who invited them.
Tyler still lived with us. It was decided by my mother, who easily persuaded my father, that he was to stay until after graduation. During which they would then help him get into college and onto his feet. I thought it was nice that my parents were going out on a limb to help him.
Tyler and I are still friends, but Jamie and I are closer. Over the past month we clicked and have been almost inseparable. At school we few classes together but when we did we sat together. When we didn't we text constantly.
Just as they were entering the front door I hear my name spoken by Jamie. I sighed and shook my head. There was no way I would be getting out of socializing with my friends, at least with Jamie in the picture. She is good for me though, she doesn't let me succumb into my misery, even when she doesn't know what is going on.
"Hey Renesmee!" Jamie said as she came into my bedroom. She skipped over to my side. Though my back was to her I could tell by the way her footsteps were short and quickened. "Hey Ness?" she said again.
I turned my head and gave her a gentle smile. "Hi Jamie. It's nice to see you." I forced a bigger smile and then turned my attention back to the grounds below where a few of Penelope's friends were taking off their clothes revealing their bikini clad bodies. "
"Are you alright?"
"Have you ever noticed that when a person falls in love with something about you its usually something that they admired on someone else in the past."
"Renesmee what are you talking about?"
"I found out that Jacob once loved my mother. Well... he still does love her." my throat seemed to close on itself making it hard to breath, but not impossible.
"Jacob, the dark skinned man?" I nodded my head. "But he is just a family friend right? I mean if he was with your mother long enough to love her they have to be the same age."
She never missed a single thing when it came to detail. Except maybe the fact that my family was made up of vampires.
"Yeah but he's my friend and he didn't tell me."
"Maybe, just maybe he didn't tell you for your own good."
Could Jamie be right? Is that why Jake didn't tell me, he knew I wouldn't take it well. Then again that's everyone. What type of normal person would not freak out when they find out the guy that loves them had once loved their own mother.
"Yeah I guess."
She pushed the corners of my mouth up into a wonky smile and then grinned at me. "Be happy Ness and lets go and have some fun."
I grinned as she took my hand and pulled me from the room. "You aren't giving me a choice are you?" I snickered as I closed my bedroom door behind us.
Music filled the air as I came into the backyard from the living room. The grill was fired up and Emmett had a beer in one hand -as a prop- and a grilling spatula in the other. Standing close by was Rosalie who was glaring at a few of the senior girls who were watching him and giggling to one another. One didn't have to be a genius to know what they were talking about.
Esme and Carlisle were in deep conversation with Charlie and Sue over near the gazebo. Matthew and Penelope were entertaining their large crowd of friends over by the couches in the outdoor living room. The outdoor living area was like a normal living room except it was outside.
"Jamie, Renesmee!" Tyler called.
I turned my head in the direction of his voice and saw he was down by the boat house. Jamie didn't acknowledge him because he was so far away. Any human wouldn't have heard him, but I did.
"Jamie" I touched her shoulder to gain her attention and then started my trek towards the water.
"I told you I'd succeed Tyler." Jamie smirked as she ran and jumped on his back.
I looked at them with raised eye brows and gave my head a slight incline. "About what?"
"I told her that if I, speaking as your first friend, couldn't pry you from your room then her attempts wouldn't work either." Tyler said as he spun Jamie around on his back before setting her to her feet.
"First friend or not Ty, I already had a leg in because I am a female." She gave him and wink.
"She got you there." I grinned as I took a seat on the ground and began picking blades of grass.
As I began digging my finger into the dirt I glanced up and looked around. I was curious to who was here that I actually enjoyed being around. There was Seth and his imprintee Gracie, Ethan was no where to be seen though. Leah and James were together and sitting off a bit away from the rest of the group. Then there Jacob, he was staring blankly into the distance. Several times he would twitch, smile and then return to his blank state. What was wrong with him?
The biggest urge of wanting to go over and comfort him tore at me. I just wanted to be there for him like he was for me so many times in the past. Surely he must be still reeling from that confrontation and near death experience with Jane.
Then I remembered my mother and their history together. Pushing my hand into the ground I scraped out a handful of dirt before tossing it aside.
Getting to my feet and began removing the top layer of my clothes to reveal my scanty swim suit. "Anybody up for swimming?" I glanced over at Jake whose eyes were on me. I smirked bitterly and then turned to Tyler. "Swim with me." I laced my fingers through his and towed him towards the water.
We waded out into the deeper parts of the water and began treading. Tyler could still touch the bottom as the water rose up to his shoulders.
"Where have you been Renesmee?" Tyler asked as he brushed a strand of soppy hair back behind my ear.
I scrunched my face up. "What do you mean? I've been here."
"No you haven't you've been like an empty vessel of sorts."
I glanced at the rippling water. "It's nothing."
"It's got to be something. I mean one night Jake's acting normal and you guys are looking happy and now you both aren't talking and he looks like he's depressed. What happened, you can tell me anything."
He lifted my chin so he could see into my eyes.
"I can't tell you."
"You can tell me, trust me."
My eyes were large and pleading as I looked into his. Very slowly I shook my head. "I trust you but I can't tell you this. You couldn't handle this."
"I'm your best friend Renesmee."
"I know, that's why I am protecting you from this. If you knew you'd be in danger. Believe me I wish I had someone outside the circle that I could tell it all to but I just can't." I wrapped my arms around him and held him tight.
"It's that bad huh?" He whispered as he wrapped his arms around me and held me close. I felt his lips in my hair and hear the intake of breath through his nostrils.
"If I told you I'd have to kill you."
He laughed as if my words were a joke. But they were, they were serious. If I told him about me and my family and what we truly were the Volturi would kill him or make him change into a vampire. I couldn't subject him to that kind of future. I couldn't take away his life for my selfish reasons.
He pulled me deeper into the water and held me against him. "You are the best thing to ever happen to me. You make me happy."
I felt the corners of my lips turn up. I was smiling... and crying. Only I didn't know why.