Alpha's Torn Heart

Mate?

MURTAGH'S POV

My bedroom was filled with the smell of s*x, mixed with the orchid scent of the girl lying next to me and that of the candles. Their light created strange and hypnotizing shapes of light and shadow, which were capturing my attention more than the woman.

"You were fantastic" she murmured, hugging me, pressing her breasts against my chest. She let out a chuckle and put a wet, lipstick-stained kiss on my cheek.

I just nodded. I should haveprobably answered with something nice, but I just kept watching the dance of the flames. She was just one of the many I'd slept with, and she wasn't even the best: why make her believe falsehoods? She had been loud, unnatural, exaggerated - it would have been more natural to do it with a s*x doll.

"Really" she insisted, noticing my absence of reply, and rubbing even more against me. "It never happened to me that ..."

"You can go" I said dryly. That made her shut up: her continuous, shrill chatter was unbearable.

"But ..."

“I'm busy now. Go, please" I repeated, trying to be more polite, just to get her to get out of my bed.

She sighed and shook her head. "You're an asshole," she only said, before getting dressed and leaving.

Finally alone, I got up and, putting on a pair of pants, walked to the balcony of my room, which gave a magnificent view of the sea. The sun, a fiery red, was throwing itself into the rushing waves of the horizon: within a few minutes the first stars and planets would appear, and then the Moon would rise. Although that was every werewolf's most coveted moment, and my favorite of every day, that day I hoped it would delay as much as possible. As per tradition, at the rising of the Goddess I would be bound forever to my bethroted.

Katherine, I thought that was her name: Katherine Black. The only things I knew about her were that she was twenty, four years younger than me, and that my mother, way happier than me to meet her, had sent her a gift.

But you never gave Grace anything, did you, Mom? No, you didn't like her. She was not the daughter of a rich and powerful Alpha. She didn’t have the power to make you one of the most important Lunas in the country, I thought to myself, bitterly. I could see her, from my position: she was on the beach, already dressed up for the occasion, giving orders to the members of the pack who were finishing to set up the decorations of the gazebo and the white wooden walkways.

She saw me too, and immediately raised her left eyebrow in disapproval.

Your fiancée will be here in half an hour, she hissed through the mental link. Shower and dress up immediately. You won't dishonor your father, the pack and our guests by showing up at your wedding smelling like a brothel!

Of course, I snorted ironically. I could never ruin your big party.

Make sure you don't be a brat, Murtagh. Now obey.

As you wish.

I went back to my room, closing the windows behind me with anger, and quickly slipped under the shower in my bathroom, hoping that the hot water would help me calm down and drove away all the anger, the disappointment, the sadness. All the f*****g pain.

As I feared, it had no effect: it did not even dispel the chill that had crawled into my bones from those emotions and memories.

More frustrated than before, I quickly wrapped a towel around my hips and went back to the room, staring hatefully at the suit I had hung in the back of the wardrobe, to see it as little as possible. I should have worn it to marry my Grace, not this Katherine: but now Grace was gone.

"Murtagh?" Sean, my best friend, walked in and closed the door behind him. He was the only one in the whole pack who had the right to freely enter my room. He was already wearing his own suit, I noticed. “Mark saw the bride's car… that is, Katherine's… and it's ten minutes from here. And the moon is rising. In short, you should get ready".

"I'll be right there" I sighed. "Tell my parents I'll be down in two minutes."

Seven minutes later I was dressed into that stupid suit, busy waiting under a flowery gazebo for the bride to arrive. The only thing I wanted to do at that moment was to shift and run free on the beach, and then get lost in the woods behind; chasing preys, perceiving all the smells, the solid earth under the paws.

"Hey, kid."

My father approached me, with a tense smile on his face that I understood very well: he kind of felt sorry for forcing me into this s**t. It was my mother who insisted that he should write to Alpha Derek, proposing me as a suitor for his daughter's hand: according to her, we were each other’s only possible choice. For both me and Katherine there were no suitors of the right rank: she needed a future Alpha, and I needed a future Luna. From the dynastic point of view we were the perfect match. In the end my father had given in, mostly because my mother's reasons were true: she was the only girl in the whole f*****g country that I could marry. We were a powerful pack, and the marriage would have made us even more strong.

Better now, that both of you are young and prone to falling in love, dad sighed when he gave me the news. He had said nothing more, but I had guessed the rest of the speech: he hoped that, in this way, I would not end up stuck in a loveless marriage, celebrated only for dynastic reasons. I could read guilt all over his face: guilt for having to choose the wellness of the pack over my right of being with my own mate, as every werewolf should.

"Hi dad" I murmured, stiffening. I wasn't really in the mood for a balls-breaking father-son kind of talk.

"It's normal to be tense" he said, taking his place next to me. “For better or for worse, this day will change your life. I just want you to know… it's for your own good. Do you know this? "

Grace was my good, I thought, but didn't say it. I just nodded.

"Murtagh ... you are about to get married" he went on, more gravely. "Do you understand what it means? Katherine will be your wife, you will have to protect her and provide for her to the best of your ability."

"I know”.

“And you understand there are many people who’ll try to take her away from you”.

“I do” I answered, clenching my fists. Why the hell was he talking to me as if I was a fussing kid?

“You’d better listen, boy. Katherine will be scared, just like you, and will seek support from whoever will offer it. Now, you guys are the key of this alliance. Many people, inside and outside our pack, will try to divide you to make sure they have total control over Kate and, therefore, over the next Luna. That’s how politics work. You must avoid this scenario at all costs, and you have to start right now. Do you understand?"

"Yes".

Dad sighed and nodded. "Good," he said, squeezing my shoulder. "Listen, I can’t even imagine how much this is costing you. I know you loved Grace with all your heart, but … I want you to know I admire you immensely for doing this, for choosing the pack over …”

“Over what? Love? The only woman I really loved is dead, so tell me: over what am I choosing the pack?” I hissed, while the pain and the sorrow for Grace’s death overwhelmed me.

“I know that the love between Grace and you was strong” he said calmly. “That’s why we destroyed the pack that took her from you. But you are still young, and I know that your heart is full of love, and not of hatred as you want to make it look. For what it's worth I think you'll both be very happy."

"Let's hope" I murmured, not truly believing those words. I just wanted to end this conversation.

A sound of tires under braking reached my ears and a strange sensation surfaced in my stomach. One I've never felt before.

A shiny black SUV appeared in my sight and stopped right in front of the gangway that the boys had assembled: a man got out on the driver's side and headed for the rear door.

As soon as he opened it, a strange, intoxicating scent spread into the air: I could not identify its components, but the only image that came to mind when smelling that scent was that of a clear, silvery mountain stream, and the smell of woods at dawn.

Mate, Connor, my wolf, said, as he was filled with excitement.

No. No, it can't be, I panted.

It’s her. She’s here! he insisted anxiously.

A slow and sweet melody began to play, a set of strings, choruses and bells made by those members of my pack who dabbled in music; a woman got out of the car, wrapped in a simple but elegant white dress: it was Katherine.

Unlike the other brides at the weddings I attended, she showed no signs of shyness, fear or modesty: proudly, she refused to keep her eyes down and kept her head proudly and quietly raised. She had pure Alpha blood in her veins, after all.

And as soon as I saw her face, her warm light-brown eyes, her highlighted hair, the sweet line of her lips, those sensations I had felt as soon as I heard the sound of the car returned with the violence of a flood, tenfold, a hundredfold in power.

Connor was right. The signs didn't lie.

It was her.

My mate.