The Drinking Game

In Mourning

Jen's gaze held Cam's. “Yes, in a way, but this is my way of dealing with it." Her gazed held his in a vice grip. Confidence would win him over. “Problem?" Did that sound too petulant?

His face froze in a stern expression. “Yes, I do. I think this case may be too close to home for you."

She couldn't deny that, but she wouldn't admit her past relationship with Ken or his death would cloud her judgment. She had a more personal stake in this having nothing to do with Ken. “I don't agree and," she crossed her fingers in her lap. “My supervisor doesn't either."

She stood to end the meeting. His words stopped her. “I'm going to request another agent."

A million arguments raced through her head, all of them desperate sounding. “You won't get one for a while. We're backed up and I had the smallest case load."

She kept her eyes on his, willing him to accept the explanation.

Cam shook his head. “I don't like it."

She leaned towards him. “Maybe not, but you're stuck with me." His eyes went cold. “I need to meet with Detective Gaudette. Is he working today?"

Shifting in his chair, away from her, he looked as if he wanted to say more on the subject of her taking the case. He sighed. “He'll be in later today."

Pulling a card out of her suit pocket, she placed it on the desk. Cam eyed it. “Give him this. “

She turned and headed to the door.

“Carrot, you're on notice."

She whirled, blood raging in her head. How dare he. “Notice? For what?"

“If I think you're having problems, I call your supervisor and get you yanked off this case."

Her eyes narrowed. “I don't need a father, Cam. I'm perfectly capable of taking care of myself."

She stalked out.

***

Not being able to quell his restlessness, Sean drove toward Ken's house. Gone were the crowds of neighbors mixed with law enforcement. Only police tape across the door spoke of recent events. The yellow contrasted starkly with the weathered gray siding. The façade reflected Sean's mood.

Mike Gladstone smoked a cigarette in front of Ken's house. His eyes danced as he inhaled the smoke as if his whole well-being depended on it. Mike was a desperate smoker, but maybe he looked that way in everything he did. Had they finished?

Lighting up one of his own, Sean parked and sauntered over to him. “Hey, Mike."

Mike didn't look glad to see him and barely made eye contact. “Hey." His gaze skittered around the neighborhood. “You aren't supposed to be here."

Sean feigned surprise. “Why not? It's a homicide scene, or at least a suspicious death and I investigate those."

Mike took a drag of his cigarette then scratched the top of his blond head. A wrinkled shirt held his tie as if it were something smelly. “Cam specifically said not to let you in."

Putting a hand to his heart, Sean stepped back. “I don't want to go in. Really." Liar.

“I know." Mike's eyes rolled in his head. “You just want us to tell you what we saw. Cut to the chase here, Gaudette."

“Well true, buddy."

The detective's eyes narrowed. “You and I have never been buddies."

He spoke the truth. Sean had never been one to socialize with his co-workers. He and Ken had been the only single guys in the department. That situation made for a permanent feeling of not belonging.

Thoughts of his dead partner sparked a stabbing pain across his chest. He shook it off. He had a job to do. He had to make sure his ex-partner wasn't railroaded. “Then tell me what you found?"

Mike looked around, but no one was near them. “The biggest collection of illegal porn I've ever seen. We called in vice to take the stuff."

Sean took another inhale of his cigarette, his pulse quickening. This wasn't the answer he expected. He didn't believe Ken had anything illegal in his possession. “Nothing else?" Evidence of other types?

“Whoa, Gaudette. That isn't enough? Vice told me they'd been about to drop the net on a huge trafficking ring. Ken may have been part of that."

Not so calm now, Sean gritted his teeth. “There's no way Ken was involved in that."

The other man shrugged. “Believe what you want, but I know what I saw. All homemade tapes."

Sean clenched his fists, not believing his co-worker. What reason did he have to lie? I don't get it. What happened to the things I saw?

Sean brushed past him towards Ken's front door. A hand on his shoulder stopped him. “Cam said to arrest you if you so much as sneeze on this scene."

His blood pounding in his ears, Sean shook off Mike's hand. “Guess I better to talk to Cam."

***

Powering up her Porsche, Jen drove out of the four-story parking deck in downtown Jenkins' Crossing. She fought to keep her accelerator off the floor. Her anger wanted to boil all over her. And her grief.

As she waited at a red light, she pulled back her strawberry blond hair then pushed a button to roll down her window. Despite the heat, she wanted to feel the wind in her face.

She headed south to Biggin Hill, a town where some of the roads still weren't paved. As she let the turbo loose, she felt relief wash over her. Thankfully no one else drove on the road so she could get her car's six cylinders moving. What an adrenaline rush.

“What will I do if he calls my supervisor?" she asked and her words whipped back at her in the warm wind.

She could be in a lot of trouble. The papers she had in her possession sat on the seat next to her. Her gaze alighted on them briefly before going back to the windy road ahead.

“What would I have done if I'd grownup here instead of California?" she mused.

She laughed. Her mother had moved them to the other coast six months after her father's death. She was chasing a man that she never did marry.

The man her mother settled down with had been a lot better. He'd given Jen this car and held her hand during her mother's funeral. He'd even learned to love the wild teenager she'd been.

Jen bit her lip. Her stepfather would be disappointed that she'd gone against regulations. She shrugged. “Maybe I'll quit anyway. “ Maybe I'm not really meant to be in law enforcement.

She could think those words, but had only said them out loud to Ken. The thought of him had her slowing down. She grieved for him like a friend, not a lover. Guilt tore through her, threatening to leave her in shreds.

The emotion was uncalled for since the break up had been mutual. Faced with the truth about Ken, she could only let him go. He didn't want to live a lie anymore.

She sighed. “You didn't have to kill yourself."

Making a turn, Jen parked her car on the road's shoulder. She climbed out to look at the Raritan River meandering past where she stood. A dunk in the shallow water sounded good, but she opted not to take off her shoes. Not very lady like.

“I have a job to do," she admonished herself and turned back to the car.

Jen headed to Jenkins' Crossing to track down Ken's partner, hoping he would have some answers for her.