Loving and Loathing Thy Mate

Chapter 3 Penny's POV

Remenbering the past ...

" Penny, come on inside, dinner is ready "my mum had shouted. I looked at the door and back to Brendan, who was with me in the tree. Mum rolled her eyes and smiled. " You already know I made a plate for him too, come on before it goes cold. Or your brother eats it all" she laughed. We both jumped down from the branch we had been dangling from and raced each other to the house. Brendan was quicker. Brendan had always been faster than me at running. Much to me being mad about that, I wanted to be as fast.

He ran into my house like it was his own, it may well be. He was always there. We rushed into the kitchen and Kyle, my brother, was already sitting waiting eagerly for his go ahead from mum to get the food. He was older than me by a year. And he was big for his age , taller than most his own age. No wonder why the boy ate like he would never be able to eat again.

But dad was missing from his chair. I looked at it and at Mum, who was taking her seat. She saw where I had been looking and smiled sadly. " He is busy tonight, you know daddy is kept very busy with his responsibilities to the pack "she said.

" Yea, I heard my dad say they had another heard of blood suckers in the labs. He was talking to Uncle Jimmy. Saying they were going to be busy " Brendan said off-handedly, his mouth pretty much had saliva coming out of it as he stared at the warm bread rolls that filled the air with the most amazing scent. I looked at my mum in confusion though. What did Brendan's dad mean by that?

We were only nine at the time. I knew blood suckers meant vampires. But what was the lab ? Why would there be a heard of them? Mum had always said I was too nosey, that I liked to know everything.

Mum looked a little shocked at Brendan's words, when she saw me looking at her, she cleared her throat. " Come on Penny. Eat your food, dig in boys," she said, then she avoided my gaze.

Later that night, after mum had put me to bed, I heard the door open downstairs and I heard dad moving around. Sneaking out of bed , I crept to my bedroom door and saw the lights on downstairs. Moving as quietly as I could , I tiptoed down the stairs and looked into the kitchen. I saw dad getting the plate of food out of the oven mum had placed there for him. As he was bending down, though he froze in his movements. " Penny, you are meant to be asleep" he said quietly, it was more than likely it had been not to wake the whole house.

" I can't "I whispered, knowing that he would hear me. His wolf hearing probably heard me trying to sneak down the stairs.

" Come on , I will get you some warm milk ", I smiled and headed down. Dad was absent most of the time, distracted a lot too. But that was because dad was important. But when I caught him home, or present he was the best dad. Walking into the kitchen, dad finished taking his plate out and turned to look at me. He looked tired. Like he was dead on his feet and he smelled like clean soap , like he had just been washed.

" Sit down Penny" he said, smiling slightly through the exhaustion. He heated up my milk and got me a few cookies out of the cupboard and placed them in front of me, and then he heated his own food. I had watched him move sluggishly around the kitchen and then when he sat , it had looked like it took a lot of effort to eat his food.

" Why can't you sleep baby ? " He asked.

" Something Brendan said ", I told him and dunked a cookie into my milk before taking a bite of it. Dad always put a bit of sugar in warmed up milk. He had done it since I was little and on nights I couldn't sleep. Mum said he was defeating the object by hyping me up with sugar, but dad said it made it taste better. He was right it did.

" What did that boy say that made it so you couldn't sleep ? " he had asked me.

" Well, he said the reason you and his dad are so busy is because you have a heard of blood suckers in a lab. He said he heard his dad telling his uncle Jimmy. Daddy, why would you have vampires in a lab ? And what is a lab ? " I had been looking at the cookie I was dunking in my milk, making sure it didn't break off and drop to the bottom of the glass. So, I didn't see my daddy's face straight away.

But when he growled, I flinched, his voice was laced with anger. Daddy was never angry at me. " Brendan's daddy shouldn't have been speaking of matters so openly. You forget you ever heard that Penny, do you hear me ? Do not speak of that to or with anyone again, or you will be in trouble. Do you hear me ? " He snapped. His eyes were blazing with anger and I had teared up straight away , he never looked at me like that.

" Do you hear me Penny ? " He asked again when I didn't answer straight away, and I nodded, tears streaming down my little face. " Good, now go to bed "he snapped, getting up from his chair and he threw his untouched dinner in the bin. I rushed from my chair and ran upstairs. Just seconds later, I heard him leave the house again. I had been so confused. Why had he become angry with me ? I had gone to bed with tears staining my cheeks. And the next day he wasn't at breakfast. And I was told I couldn't play with Brendan that day.

When I had seen him the day after that , Brendan had looked miserable. But when I had asked him what was wrong he had just shaken his head and said he couldn't talk about it.

It took weeks for him to perk up and be his usual self. It had been a long two weeks and daddy had hardly been seen at home. But I would see him with the alpha while Brendan and I were out playing with the other children of the pack.

The door opened to the room I was being held captive in, and I quickly went out of my memory. I was lying on the bed, after he had whipped me that day and got me to talk , he had moved me from the dank smelly room that had many scents of blood in it. The rooms' purpose was obviously for torture. Why else would there be chains on the floors and the ceiling and the walls?

The room was at the side of the cell I was kept in. That day he had moved me out of this room into that room for his torture. Then he placed me back in here after. I smelt food , but didn't look up. Even if my stomach growled at just the smell.

I didn't move because I scented him too, he smelt like the crisp winter air when the snow was on the ground. And ice was on the branches of the trees. Funny how his scent would be something cold like him. A cold thing just like he was. How fitting.

" Eat that , then I will take you to clean yourself up" his voice was strained, he sounded stressed even to my ears.

I ignored him, and kept my back to him as I lay on the small hard bed. I stared at the brick wall in front of me instead. It had damp mossy stuff growing on the wall, and trickles of water ran down it.

I felt the energy in the room start to change the longer I didn't do as he had said. It became thick with frustration and anger.

" Don't ignore me" he snapped. I did.

That was until he marched over, his hands went to my arm and his fingers gripped my arm hard as he yanked me up. That feeling of electricity shot through me when he touched me. Like it did before. I would have tried to fight him, but my body was weak. Since I had gotten here he had been injecting me with Wolfbain. It felt like sandpaper in my veins. But he was doing it to keep my wolf at bay. Making it, so I couldn't shift, plus I had been refused the meals. I hadn't eaten anything.

If he doesn't kill me, I can make myself go out another way. I could just fade myself away.

He pulled me around, so I was facing him, so I looked down and kept my eyes off of his very perfect face. I inwardly groaned at myself for even thinking that. I had these words in my mind, words that I should have broken my silence to say. But every time I went to say them it was like I had become a mute and I choked on the words.

" You will eat "he sneered at me. He pulled me across the room and pushed me to the floor in front of the tray where he had placed the food down on the floor. " Eat or I will force-feed it to you "he hissed. I closed my eyes, I felt tears trying to come forward, but I would not let him see me weak. So I held them off. He took that as refusing. The next half hour, he forced the food down my throat. He had gripped my hair in one hand while forcing the vegetables and chicken into my mouth. I had nearly choked numerous times through the process. I wish I was back at that table with my mum, Brendan and Kyle right now. I had food all over me, in my hair and on the clothes I had on. He was covered in food too from where I had spat it at him.

After that form of torture , he had marched me down a dark, dimly lit hall into another room where there were showers. He had pushed me under the spray fully clothed, and then he left the room with a backwards murderous glare at me. " Get undressed and wash " he had snapped just before he disappeared out of the room. I heard the lock click into place and then his footsteps went down the hall. Was this another bout of torture leaving me here to prune up ?