Fated but Forgotten

Chapter14 - Rocco

Having stormed from Micah’s home, I did not know where to go, nor what to do. Usually, when angry, I would allow Ciro out for a run, but right now I did not have my wolf to turn to. My wolf was missing in action. He had retreated, struggling with the situation we found ourselves in. Leaving me to battle it out alone. I felt I was drifting out to sea, barely keeping my head above the water right now. I did not know what to do.

This was not a position I had ever been in before, and was never a position I expected myself to be in. So, it was not one I had prepared for. When I met Aria, I thought all my problems were solved. That my life was complete. Happiness and contentment had filled me and taken over... everything I had wanted was there, and my wolf felt the same. And now it felt like it had all been torn out from under me with no warning... had I done something wrong?! Did I deserve this pain and the suffering?

I contemplated heavily as I wandered aimlessly through the familiar pathways of the pack, truly unsure of where I was going, or what it was I was doing. Going back to the hospital to sit by Aria’s side had been my plan, but that seemed like the wrong thing to do now I knew that she had gone to the doctors to tell them that I had scared her. My presence seemed to unsettle her, when I had hoped it would soothe her… calm her… somehow help her in her healing. Was I making things worse?! The thought sickened me. Once more, tears filled my eyes. I hated myself right now...

‘Ciro?’ I reached out to my wolf, like I had so many times of late, hoping desperately for a response, but there was nothing. Radio silence. He was well and truly in the nether regions of my mind. Fully retreated to mourn what he was feeling was the loss of his mate… but she was still there, she just didn’t know who we were. I didn’t know what that meant for me, or for my wolf, and I didn’t know how to fix it. Yet, that was all I wanted to do. Fix it. Fix this mess we found ourselves in. Or go back in time. Go back in time, so I was able to help her...

‘Rocco?!’ I received an unexpected mindlink from my Dad, taking me by surprise, telling me that Micah had likely reached out to him. I got along with my family just fine, usually seeing each other a couple of times a week. Obviously, since this had happened with Aria, that had not happened, and instead, that had been more a case of keeping in touch through the occasional mindlink. But, the timing of this mindlink seemed too precise given what had just occurred, and how I was feeling. My friend had reached out for help...

‘Yes?’ I replied, not wanting to talk, but knowing my father would not give up on trying to contact me. He would be on a mission, I was certain of that, especially if asked for help by our Alpha.

‘Where are you?’

‘Wandering aimlessly. And you?’ I asked sarcastically. Not caring in the slightest what my Dad thought. He likely knew everything anyway from Micah.

‘Seriously son, where are you? Let me come and be there for you. I know you are battling right now.’ The tone, even in the mindlink was somber. Battling? I wasn’t battling. I should have been battling the day Aria was injured. Battling to defend my mate, but instead I went against my gut, and went out to save the rest of the pack…

‘I will be fine, Dad, just going to walk for a while.’ I made a bid to dismiss him. My Dad has always been there for me. He was a good Dad, that is what they do, right? But right now I did not feel able to allow him in. I could not talk things through. I needed to be alone.

‘We could go for a run?’ he suggested. Of course, that would be the first thing he suggested. Mine and my Dad’s runs were legendary. We could run for hours, or more accurately, our wolves could. Loving to compete against one another. It was just in their nature, both being Beta wolves. Both loved having the freedom to run so freely, the breeze within their fur. And, I have to admit, I loved that too. It was fun, and I missed it. But, obviously, my Dad did not know my wolf was somewhat absent right now…

‘Not really feeling a run right now.’ I lied, not wanting to explain to him the real reason, knowing he would be instantly concerned the moment he heard my wolf was retreating. That for a werewolf was an instant red flag. I knew that, and I was terrified to admit it to anyone.

‘Coffee then?’

‘At this time of night?’ I tried even harder to avoid having to see him. ‘We would never sleep.’ It was the most ridiculous of excuses, because I knew there would be no chance of sleep finding me tonight.

‘Rocco Bianchi, you tell me where you are now, or I will have the f*****g pack warriors find you.’ My Dad snapped, sounding every bit the authoritative figure he used to be. He had retired from his role as Beta when I took over, but dammit he still liked to act like the boss when he could…

‘I will meet you by the training field.’ I told him, not wanting to have the pack warriors hunting me down, because I did not doubt for a moment that my Dad would follow through with his threat. He would likely even enjoy it too.

‘Good. See you there.’

I was not far from the training field, and began to walk in that direction, my feet feeling heavy as I walked. Talking to my Dad was the last thing I felt like doing, but maybe it was better than being on my own. That way I would not be tempted to return back to watch over Aria at the hospital. I am sure if something was wrong with her, they would let me know, right?

If she needed some space, then maybe I would have to admit defeat for a little while and give her that, whether it broke my heart or not…