SEEKING LOVE

chapter three

Aliyah,they are here"usman said as he entered my room. I could feel the tension around and all. I knew he was worried and unhappy with this whole decision but there was really nothing anyone could do about it.once father made a decision everyone just went along with it even if we didn't agree to it.

"are you okay"he added after sometime and I could feel him walking towards me.

"I am fine, don't worry about me"i said wiping the tear that just slipped down my face.

"I am just a bit nervous and all. You know?"I said forcing a smile on my lips.

"now we better get downstairs"he said helping me up from the chair.

"you know, you really don't need to be nervous, you are beautiful and you have the kindest heart"usman assured as we walked downstairs.

I walked into the living room and immediately I felt so many eyes on me. Inner sight people!!! Usman helped me sit on the chair then he sat next to me. At first everywhere was silent until my dad broke the silence.

"well, Ahmed"he said and then I figured that was his friends name,"this is my daughter aliyah"

"mashallah, she is pretty"i heard someone say, it was probably Ahmed's wife "I am Mariam, Ahmed's wife"she said as I had guessed.

"jazakhaallah khairan"mother said

"and this is Ibrahim,my son"mariam said"oh,yeah" I said not knowing what to reply with.

"can we talk, maybe privately"I heard someone say but I guess it was Ibrahim.

"but is there a need for that,we can just get our answers now right aliyah?"father said and I already understood what he said.

"darling, let's leave them for sometime"mom whispered but loud enough for me to hear.

"let's all go out for sometime"mother said to everyone but I knew it was excluding I and Ibrahim.

"is there something you will like me to know about?"he suddenly asked after sometime.

"apart from the fact that I am blind and really you don't have to pity me or anything"i said hoping I didn't sound rude."I was homeschooled all my life and I also like to be alone"

"I really don't know, it seems like there is still alot I need to know about you"he said gently.

"yeah, right"i muttered

"I have a degree in civil engineering"he said "I think we will just wait for your answer till tonight"he added

"yeah"i said letting out the breath I didn't know I was holding.

*****************

I layed on my bed few minutes after they had gone.

"come in"i said as the door opened gently it was mother.

"Ibrahim's mom just called, they said they like you and will want to know your answer"mother said sitting on my bed

"does it even matter what I say,right? You guys already decided everything and you already know the answer. So why is anyone even bothering to ask me about it"

"Aliiyah"mother said holding my hands in hers"i love you and you know that all I want for you is to be happy. If you don't want to get married you can just tell me"

"I am not sure there is anything anyone can do especially when father has finalized it"

"yeah, your daughter is right"i heard father say as he entered my room.

"I just called Ahmed now and told him you said yes. It is final, your wedding has been fixed for the 1st of next month"

"darling that's too fast"

"then just start the preparation right now and there will be a press conference for the family before the wedding, people will want to know about the wedding so Aliyah you better behave there"he said then I heard his footsteps as he walked out.

"darling"!!mother said as she followed father out.

Sometimes I wish I could see how father looks now. Does he look like someone calm or maybe he looks like the way he acts. I know mother must be pretty because everyone says I look like her and that she is beautiful. I thought about what had happened today with Ibrahim and how I had treated him. What annoys me is why he acts so kind and gentle when we both know the circumstances of our marriage. What also annoys me is that it seems he wants to marry me also because he pities me which is awful and very annoying too.

I hate everything, and "I just want to be left alone"i said as I pulled the bed spread with both hands and tears streamed down my face. I will just lay in my room while they all plan my future and life. It is not the first time anyway,they have always done it.being blind made me used to getting my life planned by others. Sometimes they asked after they have made the decisions for me and other times they just don't bother to ask and I wonder how much life would have been different if I could see.