A Ten to Zero...
1094 Words
Sebastian’s POV
“Hey babe,” I wrapped my hands around her feeling how her body stiffened at my touch.
“Seb?” her voice raised a notch higher “What do you want?”.
“Amy, we need to talk, we need to talk, a lot of things have happened and we’re yet to talk about any of it,”.
“Talk about what, Seb?” she turned to face me “We lost a child, we lost my baby and that’s fine. I am fine, I’m seeing a therapist and I am doing alright,”.
“We’ve got to face it,” I swallowed hard trying to find the right words to say “We’ve got to come in terms with it, please. Look at us, we're a shadow of our formal selves. Our relationship has gone from a ten to zero and I am so afraid of losing you, my love. I love you so much but we need to do this as a team, we need to grieve together, we need to feel this pain together and...".
"I thought that is why you got me a therapist?" Amy stopped me mid-sentence looking every bit indifferent to all I was saying.
"I got you a therapist so you could heal and...".
"Good," she interrupted again as she lay down "Allow the therapist to do her work except you want to throw your money away. Oh!" she chuckled still backing me "You've got money so I'm sure you won't mind losing a few bucks anyways," she chuckled.
I laid back down trying to come up with unused ideas. I've practically tried everything in my book to get Amy to talk to me. At least for five minutes or even two minutes but I was always met with a stone wall. In situations where she manages to communicate, she's always sarcastic and doesn't fail to talk about my wealth as if she was angry with it.
Time ticked slowly as I tried to force myself to sleep. I couldn't.
Aside from the fact that I wanted to be with my wife...I needed her intimately. We didn't share a lot of intimacy when she was still carrying because she was always not in the mood or tired. I know it was too much and maybe too soon but even a kiss would help calm me down and keep me focused.
I sat up again, wondering if she was asleep already.
"Darling," I said in a hushed voice but there was no response.
"Amy?" I tried the second time.
There was a slight shuffle before she turned to face me...from the faint light coming from her table stand, her eyes were ablaze with anger.
"What is it you want again, Sebastian?" she said with annoyance "I was almost sleeping,".
"I'm sorry," I apologized offering her a smile "I just want to talk to you about two things only and then you can go back to sleep,".
She eyed me with suspicion but didn't lay back down on the bed so I took it as my cue to continue.
"The therapist told me you're unresponsive. She said you won't say anything and would spend the entire therapy session with eyes closed,".
I tried to keep the emotions out of my voice so I won't be accused of speaking harshly to her.
"I thought she's a therapist," her lips cracked into a thin smile that made my heart flutter with hope. I couldn't remember the last time I saw her smile.
"Well, she is but you're making her job difficult and she's feeling frustrated already," I quipped.
"So, she reported me to you as her senior therapeutical manager?" her lips twisted into a sardonic smirk.
I nearly howled out in laughter at her insinuations but I held back because she had on a serious expression.
"No," I stuck my tongue on the roof of my mouth "I wanted to know how everything was coming along and she told me that,".
"Splendid," she shrugged "She's incompetent if she expects I would just open my mouth and begin to talk the first time. These things take time and process. I just lost a baby and if she feels it's easy... then she might as well get pregnant and be in the same shoes as me. Maybe she'll understand,". she hissed.
"Don't worry, dear" I patted her hand comfortingly "She'll try to do her job efficiently from now on,".
"So, what's the other thing you want to talk about?" she said immediately shrugging off my hands.
How do you tell your wife that you're horny and would want some form of intimacy? The quiet scowl on her face was putting me off but I needed to say it anyways.
"Well," I cleared my throat "This is a bit more personal and I'm not trying to force you I just want you to understand that I have needs and wouldn't mind if I can get some kind of relief,".
She remained quiet and continued watching me. I swallowed hard and continued.
"I want you baby," I continued "We've not had intimacy lately and I'm dying for it but I also want you to take your time, okay. No rush just do you,".
Deafening silence followed when I finished. I could feel her staring at me but I was too scared to look at her...while also wondering why she hadn't said anything yet.
"Are you finished?" she says finally folding her hands across her chest.
Sheepishly, I nodded regretting why I brought up the topic in the first place.
"You have to give me sometime, Sebastian," she started "I don't know if I'm properly healed and all that...".
"But you wanted some some weeks ago..." I stopped her mid-sentence.
"So what?" she returned coldly "That was some weeks ago and this is now. I am not ready to f**k yet, Sebastian. I don't know when I'll be for your information but trust me...I'm not ready yet and if you've got nothing else to say...I want to go back to sleep. It's past my bedtime already,".
She waited for five seconds before she turned and laid on the bed giving me her back. I didn't know what to say but the conversation helped at least. Her reaction wasn't the best but it was better than what I had expected. My honest desire was to do anything that makes her happy at the end. It was all I ever wanted.
But for now... I am going to be the perfect husband.
- Writer
