Married To A Tyrant

MANSUR "Get up, you lazy man." Rukayyah said, nudging me in bed. I turned lazily and squinted my eyes at the light. "Yaya Mansur, ka tashi mana. Gari ya waye. (Brother Mansur wake up. It's morning already)." she said, nudging me a little bit harder this time. I groaned and dropped the duvet, glaring at my twenty two year old younger sister. She was smiling sweetly at me, oblivious to the fact that I wanted to strangle her to death. "Get out of my room." I said, pointing to the door. She stomped her feet and glared at me, placing her hands on her hips. "It's not like I even wanted to come here." she said, squaring her shoulders. "Umma tana kiran ka (Umma is calling you)." she said, walking out of my room. I fell back onto my pillow and groaned in frustration. It was too early for errands. Saturdays are meant for resting, not for driving around town. And knowing Umma, she most definitely wants to send me on an errand. Heading into the bathroom, I turned on the tap and sprinkled my face with some water. I slapped my cheeks a couple of times, trying to erase every last bit of sleep from my system. My beard was looking very rough and unkempt. I needed to get a trim very soon. Running my fingers through my hair, I quickly brushed my teeth and headed out towards the main house. As I walked, the cold harmattan air blew through the compound, making me shiver. I should have worn a coat. I knocked on the back door as I arrived. The house seemed very quiet for a Saturday morning. Where was everybody? Rukayyah opened the door, not even bothering to look at me. "Sannu mutan BQ (Hello boys-quarters resident)." she said, smirking as she turned to run away. I rolled my eyes and stepped into the kitchen. In case you're wondering, I'm not really living in my parents house. At twenty eight years, that would be an embarrassment. I have my own house in Wuse, but it's currently undergoing renovation. So for the main time, I have to make do with what I've got. Judging by how quiet the house was when I stepped into the kitchen, I guessed that everybody else must be sleeping. My two other siblings - Hafsah and Nafisah - would have been causing a lot of commotion if they were awake. They would probably be sleeping till noon since it was a Saturday. I decided to enter the living room through the dining room, because that would give me a good view of the living room before I announced my arrival. Stopping in front of the dining room, I looked around at the living room, which was completely empty. The TV was turned on and it was tuned to Arewa24, so I knew that Umma must have been here. If it wasn't Arewa24, then it would be Zeeworld or Africa magic Hausa. Grabbing the remote from the center table, I switched the channel to M-net premier, where The Avengers movie was showing. Leaning against the chair, I began to watch the movie before I was interrupted by the sound of Umma's slippers on the tiles, descending the stairs. I straightened up instantly, quickly flicking back to Arewa24. "Hajiya Umma, ina kwana(Good morning Umma)." I chuckled as she finally arrived at the bottom of the stairs. She was wearing a black hijab, with her Qur'an on one hand and a tally counter in the other. She was muttering duas (supplications) silently as she watched me, before she quickly finished her supplications. "Miye na kira na wani Hajiya kuma? Kodai wani abu kake so(Why are you calling me Hajiya? Do you perhaps want something from me)?" she asked, sinking into the plush leather chair closest to the TV. "Haba dai(Impossible)." I muttered, sitting on the floor beside her. "I'm a grown man. I have my own job, my own house, and I'm twenty eight years old." "Don't forget that you're turning twenty nine next month." she chuckled, placing the Qur'an gently on the side table. "How could I forget my own birthday?" I laughed, touching her knee lightly. "Anyway, dama abunda yasa nace Rukayyah ta kiramun kai da sassafe kenan (That's why I told Rukayyah to call you so early in the morning)." she said, glancing at the TV briefly. "Your father and I have been talking." she said, clearing her throat. That was never a good sign. When ever Umma did that, it meant that the news to follow was a serious one. "He told me to advice you, Mansur that you're getting too old to just be driving around town anyhow and going out for parties with your friends whenever you wish. It's high time you thought about settling down and starting your own family. "I know you said you're looking for someone, but just put a little bit more effort. He was suggesting that we arrange a marriage between you and his friend's daughter. I'm sure you know her already; Halima Ahmed, the daughter of Senator Ahmed." she said, leaning forward. "Amma Umma ai bazawara ce (But Umma she's a divorcee)." I exclaimed, massaging my temples as I felt a slight migraine coming up. I hated discussing anything related to marriage. Everyone thought it was easy, but they didn't understand how stressful it was. It wasn't like I didn't want to get married. At my age, I should be married. Most of my friends were. But I've set very high standards which my wife must reach. I still hadn't met someone who could reach those standards. I didn't want to marry someone who I may end up divorcing in the future. The last thing I wanted was to marry someone who I couldn't live with for the rest of my life. "So what if she's a divorcee? Isn't she still a human being? Besides, they say experience is the best teacher. At least she would know the rights and wrongs of marriage, and she will try to avoid them. And her marriage didn't even last that long." Umma argued, trying to make me see things from her own point of view. "If she knew so much, her marriage wouldn't have died." I muttered under my breath. "Toh shikenan Mansur! Ka zauna kana jira har qannen ka suyi aure kai sai bayan raina saikayi aure (Fine, Mansur! Remain unmarried until all your younger ones get married. Maybe after my death, you will finally decide to marry)." she said, withdrawing into her seat as silent tears began to fall from her face. I quickly wiped away the tear that was falling on her cheek. "Dan Allah kiyi hakuri Umma. Insha Allahu zan maida hankali ah nema (Please forgive me Umma. By God's grace, I will put more effort into finding a bride)." I said, placing my hand on her knee. "I pray so." she sniffed, turning away from me. We sat there in silence, each absorbed in thought. I was looking at the TV, but my attention was not even there. I was thinking about how I would find a spouse so I could please my mother. A few minutes later, Abba came down the stairs with a newspaper in his hand. He was wearing his reading glasses, and there was a frown on his face. "Ina kwana, Abba (Good morning, Abba)." I greeted, bowing my head. "Lafiya (Fine)." he muttered, not even looking at me. "Ki cewa Rukayyah ta kawo min ruwa waje (Tell Rukayyah to bring some water outside for me)." he addressed Umma, walking out instantly without even waiting for her reply. "Allah ya sawaqe (May God exchange things for the better)." she muttered, standing up from her seat. As she began to head upstairs, the limp in her step became more pronounced. "When are you going to get your leg checked again, Umma?" I asked. "Soon, Insha Allah." she said. "Oh by the way, your Uncle Kabir is coming later today. He's coming with the entire family. So don't go anywhere too far." "Insha Allah." I said, heading for the door. Three hours later, when I'd taken my nap after binge-watching Two Broke Girls, I took a shower and wore my grey joggers with a black tee-shirt. I trimmed the edges of my beard with an electric clipper, making it low on the sides. Knock...Knock... "Waye (Who is it)?" I asked, furrowing my brows. "Umma tace ka zo (Umma is calling you)." Nafisah said, walking away instantly. I sighed and rolled my eyes, pausing the video game I was playing. I slipped on my slippers and headed for the main house. "Assalamu Alaikum (Peace be upon you)." I greeted, walking into the living room. From the noise that was echoing everywhere, I could guess that there was a large crowd already. I wore a blank expression as I walked in. "Wa'alaikum as salam (And unto you too)." everyone answered in chorus, as several eyes turned to look at me. "Mansur, is it really you or am I seeing double?" Aunty Rahama exclaimed, covering her mouth with her hands in shock. I gave her a fake smile and knelt down beside Umma. "Nafisah tace kina kira na (Nafisah said you're calling me)." I said, looking up at her. "Yes. I told her to call you so you can meet your cousins. When was the last time you saw them?" Umma said, smiling happily the way she did when ever she was surrounded by her relatives. Right on cue, they all chorused "Yaya Mansur ina wuni?" "Lafiya qalau (I'm fine, thank you)." I said, rising from my kneeling position. "What about Uncle Kabir? I thought you said he was coming as well." I asked Umma. "He's upstairs with your father. Yanzu Salma ta raka Rukayyah ta gaida shi (Salma just escorted Rukayyah to greet him)." she said, pointing towards the stairs. "Let me go and greet him." I said, heading towards the stairs. As I reached the landing, I almost bumped into Rukayyah who was coming down from the stairs. "Haba Yaya, so kake ka karya ni tun yanzu (Come on brother, do you want to injure me now)?" Rukayyah said, putting her hands out to stop me. I glared at her, but my eyes went up to the person behind her. She was wearing a black abaya with a white shirt and black skinny jeans. Her white veil was tied around her head, held in place by a pink clamp beside her left ear. The last time I'd seen her was when I was leaving for college five years ago. She and her family members had come to the airport to see me off. "Magana nake maka, ka tsaya kana kallon Salma (I'm talking to you, but you're busy looking at Salma)." Rukayyah said, snapping her fingers in front of my face. "Please get out of my way." I said, shoving her out of my way. I climbed the remaining steps and stood just beside Salma. "Hey, long time no see. How are you?" I asked, smiling at her. "I'm fine." she said, walking down with Rukayyah without even bothering to look at me. WHAT THE HELL??? I climbed the remaining steps and headed for the terrace, where Abba and Uncle Kabir were discussing politics. I greeted both of them, briefly discussing work with Uncle Kabir before I headed downstairs again. As I headed for the door so I could go back and continue my video game, Umma called me back. "Mansur, dan Allah zo ka raka Salma ku shigo da kayan Nana daga mota (Mansur, please come and help Salma to bring Nana's clothes from the car)." she said. I nodded and headed for the front door, Salma walking behind me. I walked out and stood beside the white Range Rover which they'd come in. Wordlessly, Salma walked to the boot and opened it. "So, how is school? I remember Rukayyah saying you're attending Baze University now. You'll be graduating very soon, right?" I said, trying to start up a conversation. "School is fine." she muttered, dropping a small box beside me. "So what have you been up to? I haven't heard from you in a long time." I said, picking up the box. "Nothing." she muttered, dropping another box without even looking at me. "Are you okay?" I asked, raising an eyebrow. She closed the boot and removed the key. "I'm fine." she said, grabbing the third box and walking back to the house. This girl has serious issues. Doesn't she have simple manners? I was just trying to be polite. But anyway, that's her business. I've got better things to do.