The Joker; His foreign she-wolf

Sighs on his mind

*Johnny*

Sitting in the library of the Twin Wolves with my three closest friends, I very much wish I was at another club: the Moon Goddess Club.

It's been three nights since I kissed the She-wolf of Sighs, and I can't stop thinking about her. I even returned last night, went up the stairs, stood in that hidden alcove, and peered through a part in the draperies, hoping to catch sight of her. But after only a few seconds, I turned away, feeling very much like some sort of depraved soul, tawdry and unworthy of her, spying as I was.

Aaron found me there, battling with my conscience. I greeted my brother with “Has she returned?”

“Who?” He asked.

I couldn't believe that was a serious question. How could Aaron have forgotten? “The she-wolf you insisted I kiss.”

“Did I insist?” He crossed his arms over his chest. “Thought I merely asked.”

I decided it was a good thing we had not grown up in the same household as I suspected we might have often come to blows. “Has. She. Returned?”

Aaron grinned. The bugger knew precisely whom I was asking about and thought it amusing to pretend otherwise. Or perhaps he simply found it humorous to torment his brother. “Not to my knowledge.”

“Then I can assume she’s not here this evening?” I asked.

“Not that I have seen.”

Had my kiss been a disappointment? If she had enjoyed it, wouldn’t she have come back for another? Only she didn’t know my name. If she tried to describe me, no one would be able to identify me because I didn’t work there.

Those who had seen me before certainly wouldn’t expect that I would engage in such inappropriate behavior. Another bloke would be sent to her, would kiss her… and that scenario has an unfamiliar tightness squeezing my chest because I don’t want someone else fulfilling her fantasies. I want to fuel her desires.

Those wayward thoughts continue to plague me, even now when my friends are chattering about an investment opportunity they have been pursuing of late.

I can’t seem to latch onto their words because I'm wondering how I might have kissed her differently. Had I gone too fast, too slow? Had I been too aggressive? Not aggressive enough? Had she tasted the scotch I had tossed back before going to her, and as a result, labeled me a drunkard? Or perhaps she had not liked the flavor. She, on the other hand, had tasted delicious. Addictingly so. Sweet, yet earthy. I want to taste her again, damn it.

I wonder if I can convince Aaron to share whatever information he knows as a result of her arrival at his club. Is she visiting or does she live here permanently? Would he know precisely where she resides? And what then? Send her flowers? Might she consider me a danger if I were to go about seeking her out when she is, in truth, virtually a stranger?

“Are you listening?”

Not a stranger. Not after what we had shared. Not after the way her hands had clutched at me. I imagine how she might respond to attentions beyond a kiss, to intimate touches that follow a path from her neck down to her toes.

“Joker?” Kingsley’s harsh tone jerks my attention back to the matter at hand.

“Apologies. I was thinking... about something else.” Someone else. Another time. Another place. Where I would much rather be.

“It’s not like you to drift off. You're normally quite focused.” He says.

I had certainly been when it came to that kiss. For those few minutes, all else had floated away: troubles, worries, the past, and a legacy I'm striving to escape. All that mattered was her and being with her.

“Is it your father?” Knightley asks.

It should be. All of my thoughts should be on my sire... and my mother. How to make the upcoming transition into widowhood easier for her. Although I suspect she will adapt rather effortlessly. It wasn’t as though she had been the center of the Alpha’s life, nor he the center of hers. “It’s any number of things. What were you saying?”

“I received word from Sam Irontail that he has arrived in Blackrock City and would like to meet with us in person to discuss our interest in possibly investing in his munitions factory. Apparently, he brought his mate-hunting sister with him.”

As soon as Kingsley utters the words, I feel three pairs of eyes land on me like a physical punch. With an eyebrow arched, I glance around at my fellow members of the perfect Hand, a moniker we had acquired while at Alpha School, because of our ruthless strategy when it comes to investing. "Why are you staring at me?"

“You’re the only one amongst us not yet mated,” Knightley says.

“How precisely does that signify?” I ask.

Kingsley seems to weigh his words, “Rumors are that he has several parties interested in investing in his enterprise. Your flirting with the sister might give us an edge when it comes to partnering with this Irontail fellow, should we decide in favor of his business.”

“Flirting. That seems rather underhanded to me.” I mumble.

“Wouldn’t be the first time we had gone to great lengths to achieve what we wanted,” Ace reminds me.

“But we’ve never used an innocent to do it.” Or taken advantage of an untried heart. I know how vulnerable that sort of heart can be. In my youth, mine had certainly been open to battering and bruising. But now it's like a fortress of stone. Nothing can get past its defenses. “Besides, I doubt we need the leverage.”

I glance around the library of the Twin Wolves, a club open to men and she-wolves where all sorts of deals sometimes transpire. “The money we can provide will no doubt be sufficient. If we decide the investment will pay off. Irontail has been so astoundingly secretive about what he’s offering that I’m finding it difficult to assess the value of giving him our coins. Or to trust him, truth be told.”

“I quite agree,” Kingsley says. “However, I thought to give him the opportunity to present his case in person. Dinner tomorrow night, my residence. Mates included, of course, to ensure Miss Irontail doesn’t feel out of place.”

Which would ensure that I do, since it would obviously be expected that I would give the she-wolf some attention. Perhaps I should beg off and go to the Moon Goddess Club. But I have no reason to believe the She-wolf of Sighs would return tomorrow. In all likelihood, I will never see her again.