WANTING YOU

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Astrid's POV

I enjoyed Friday afternoons. It was my favorite day and time of the week because school would be out for the weekend and I wouldn't have to face my bullies and their many put downs.

~

As I walked up the driveway to my house, I noticed my mother was sitting on the porch looking glumly.

"Hi mom, is everything okay?" I asked and I noticed the tears she quickly wiped away before attempting to plaster on a smile.

"Hi baby, how was school?" she asked, her throat strained to get the words out.

"School was school. Why are you crying?"

"I.. um.. I had a meeting this morning at work where I found out that the company are cutting some employees and unfortunately, I was one of those employees," she answered. More tears slipped onto her face, only this time, she didn't wipe at them.

"They cannot do that to you. You're a main-floor supervisor. You're qualified and holds enough experience. You're one of the best employees at your company."

"It's not my company anymore, sweetie," mom responded and picked herself up, "I'll have to start looking for a new job and hope that I do get one as soon as possible."

"Don't worry, mom, everything is going to be okay."

"Thank you. I needed to hear those words. So tell me, what are your plans for the weekend?"

"Read some of these," I answered and indicated the stack of books in my arms. Mom laughed lightly and looped her arm on my shoulders as we walked into the house.

~

It was the second Saturday in January and I watched my neighbor, Mrs. Flint, struggled with removing her Christmas lights and decorations on the exterior of her house from my bedroom window. She was a grouchy old lady with a 'sassy' mouth I was surprisingly fond of.

Most of the other neighbors called her 'rude' and loathed her but I looked at her as a role model. She always stood up for what she thought was right and fair and if I had an ounce of her bravery, I wouldn't have anyone picking at me at school.

"Astrid, sweetie!" mom called from downstairs.

"I'm coming."

"Hurry please."

"I'm coming, mom."

I hurried downstairs and found my mom with a newspaper in her hands and wearing her warming smile again.

"I've found a job opening for a secretarial front desk position. I applied one hour ago and I've already gotten a response from them. I have an interview in four hours," she beamed.

"That's great. How far is this place?"

"It's only across town."

"Then go. Go get ready."

Mom ran out of the kitchen and I heard her feet ascending the on the stairs. Within almost forty-five minutes, she had showered and dressed professionally and looked and smelled amazing.

"Wish me luck," she said and gave me a quick kiss on the cheek before she got into her car and drove out of the driveway.

~

I was back in my bedroom reading my history book when my phone buzzed with a text message from Keri. I opened it with a smile.

Bestie: Hey. Is it okay if I come over?

Me: Of course.

Bestie: Thank you. I'll be there in 20.

Keri was on her way over and I was was buoyant for her company.

"Hey. I just wanted to get out the house and have a different environment for once," Keri greeted and said at the front door.

"I understand. Come in," I gestured and we went up to my bedroom.

"Where's your mom?"

"She has an interview."

"But I thought she already has and loved her job."

"She was fired yesterday."

"Yikes. Is she doing okay?"

"She took it hard but you know my mother, nothing keeps her down."

"Have you told her about the dreams you've been having again?"

"No. I'm not ready to tell her, plus she just lost her job. I'm not going to spring this on her and have her thinking that I need therapy again.She has enough to worry about," I answered.

"Okay. I understand. So, question, what was up with Trent Ambrose sitting at our table? Did you know that was the gossip throughout the school yesterday?" Keri asked.

Keri had a knack for the school's gossip unlike me. We were different in more ways than one. She was Chinese Vietnamese. Her signature hairstyle was a shoulder length bob and she took pride in her appearance and the way she dressed. Students often wonder why she chose me to be her best friend when she looked like she can easily fit in with the popular and pretty girls.

"I haven't any idea why he would do such a thing," I responded.

"Do you think there is 'trouble in paradise' between him and Annalise, and he was only doing that to riled her?"

"I wouldn't doubt that, using people to get under someone's skin seems like one of his traits."

"Also cannot doubt that he is handsome."

She was right. Trent was as handsome as a Greek God.

"Admit it, you have a crush on him," Keri teased.

"Yes. I'm in love with him," I answered with sarcasm.

"Do you love him for real?"

"No, I don't love him. I cannot stand Trent Ambrose. He's an intimidating, aggressive ruffian with a strong liking for attacking me with his words. He insulted my glasses for crying out loud! How can I even bring myself to liking and having a crush on someone like that. I cannot believe you're even asking me that question."

"I saw the way he looked at you yesterday. He shifted his chair in your direction so he can look at you."

"No, Keri. He shifted his chair in my direction so that he could insult me and watch me cry."

"I think he likes you."

"Are you crazy, because I believe that you are crazy. His girlfriend is Annalise McQueen. Her family can buy our highschool and everyone and everything in it. Why on earth would he like someone like me?"

"Because he sat at our table, just think about it. It doesn't make any sense," Keri said and snapped her fingers at me as she needed my brain cells to connect.

"Keri, I'm done talking about Trent. I'm super grateful that I don't have to live under the same roof with him."

"I would pay to see that," Keri joked and the conversation shifted to an assignment which was due on Monday.

~

Mom arrived home, and by her demeanor and body language, I knew the interview wasn't a success for her. For us.

"Feel like I only wasted my time and my gas going over there. The manager took one look at me and removed my name from the list," she complained and flopped into the arm chair.

"Why?"

"Apparently, they're looking for someone more vibrant and young."

"That's discrimination. You're better off not working at a place like that."

"What am I going to do without a job, huh? This house isn't going to pay for itself! Your school fees! My car note! These bills! You! Me! Not to mention college in the fall! Everything!" Mom yelled from frustration.

"I understand. Maybe I should start looking for a job too. To help out."

"No. Your focus should be on your school and the college of your choice. I'm going to have to pull myself together and make our ends meet."

~

The following week, mom set off to job interviews but was unsuccessful at every single one of them.

When I found her with an empty wine bottle, a wine stained glass and passed out, I knew she was at her wits.

Mom only drank when she was stressed.

I began having flashbacks of when dad left. Mom did this exact thing to the point where I thought I was going to lose her too.

I retrieved my cellphone and texted Keri. She had her 'connections' with finding student jobs.

I was going to help and contribute to my home.