Wind Beneath His Wings [Eternal Flames Maddox 10]

CHAPTER 1 “Give me another round of shots,” Sut said as he leaned heavily against the bar. “Don’t you think you’ve had enough, Sut?” A voice came from beside him and Sut rolled his eyes, annoyed by someone telling him he maybe had drunk enough. He was a f*****g silver fox shifter for God’s sake, which meant he could drink himself stupid on human alcohol and it wouldn’t make a difference—or it shouldn’t, but then again, had any of his breed ever drunk three bottles of Tequila and about a dozen beers all in under two hours? Probably not, but then again, did any of them have to deal with a mate who treated them like a dirty little secret? Sut growled under his breath as the thought came. Hell, his mate had treated him more like a two-bit w***e than someone he was having a secret affair with. Certainly nothing like a mate should be treated. He wasn’t blind. He saw all the mates around him and how they behaved and treated one another. His two closest friends Jett and Logan had both found their mates and they were all sickeningly happy. Even his friend Dallas had found two mates, the lucky f**k. Sut wanted to be disgustingly happy too, but fate had f****d him over when they gave him the shithead dragon, Casimir as a mate. At first Sut had thought Cas was the sexiest thing he had ever seen and had wanted to climb the large dragon shifter and beg him to f**k him and claim him. s**t, his mate was still the sexiest thing he had ever seen, but he was learning quickly what it meant by not judging a book by its cover. Not that Cas wasn’t as gorgeous inside as he was on the outside, because he was. The man was fierce and loving, a good brother and friend, which meant there must be something wrong with him that Cas didn’t want anyone to know about them and wanted to keep their relationship on the downlow. Down low. Dooo-wwwwn-nnl-looooo-sss. Ha, what a funny word. Downlow. Sut giggled as he turned to face the person who was trying to kill his buzz. Dooo-wwwwn-nnl-looooo-sss. His eyes lit up when he spotted his friend Demitri. Sut smiled and opened his arms wide, wrapped them around the man's shoulders and hugged him tight. “Demitri! Hey, bud, god I love you, man.” Demitri chuckled as he returned the hug, then stepped back smiling. “I’m sure you love everyone right about now. How much have you had to drink?” Sut threw his arms wide as he spun around saying, “I do love everyone.” As he began to stumble, Demitri caught his arm and helped him get his feet back under him. Sut gripped the edge of the bar as the room started to tilt a little. “How about we head out and go over to the Help Center and have a cup of coffee and talk?” Sut threw his head back and laughed until tears ran down his face, then turned bleary eyes toward his friend. He raised a hand and cupped Demitri’s cheek. “You suck a mice nan, but... wait, dat not right. Suck... suck, isn’t that a great word?” Demitri covered his hand and slid it from his cheek but didn’t release it. “Yes, it is, now come on, let’s go somewhere quieter.” Sutton narrowed his eyes, then licked his lips. “Are you flirting wiff me, Demitri? Cause if you are, I gotta tell you, I’m not totally opposed to a little slap and tickle. f**k, I could use a good f**k with someone who woves me. Hell, I’d settle for a like, or a lick,” Sut said, then started laughing. “Get it? A lick?” “Yeah, I get it. Come on, you need to sober up before you do, or say, something to someone that you may regret tomorrow,” Demitri said, as he wrapped an arm around Sut’s waist, but Sut wiggled away and slapped at his friend’s hand. “No, nan. I gots to stay and see my peeps sing the Karekoki. Karinoki. Karkiloki. You know what I mean.” Sut turned back toward the bar, and slapped his hand down hard as he yelled, “Hey, barkeep! Get that sexy ass over this way and give me a bottle of Tequila!” The sexy man turned and gave him a smile, but Sut could see the concern in his eyes. f**k, he was tired of seeing looks like that from people. Sexy man came to him and put a hand on the bar. “Maybe you’ve had enough, Sut?” “I am a paranorpal and that human s**t don’t do crap. Now, I gave you two hundred when I got here and told you to keep em coming. So, sexy pants, Lexi, Te-qui-la!” Lexi’s gaze flicked to his side and Sut turned his head to see Demitri shrug as he nodded. That only pissed him off more and he turned back to Lexi, an angry scowl on his face. “What the hell, man? Why you ask him? He’s not my Mama. He doesn't say what I do and don’t. Tequila. Now! And if you’re a good boy, maybe I’ll w***e my ass out to you next.” “Hey, Sut, it’s almost our turn, how about you come back to the table and help us pick out a song?” Jensen asked, as he slid an arm around Sutton’s waist. He turned to look at his gorgeous friend and smiled. “Hey, Jensen. Oh, you look so prettiful tonight,” he said, running a hand down Jensen’s face. “Logan is so f*****g lucky to have you. And you so sweet.” Jensen chuckled. “Thanks, buddy. You’re gorgeous too. Now come help me find a song, okay?” Sutton’s eyes opened wide. He had forgotten they were going to sing. “Sit. We need a song. Come on,” he said, as he stepped away and headed back to their table. Sut stumbled around a few people, and banged into a chair or two, but thanks to Jensen’s help he made it back to their table in one piece. He dropped down into his chair and reached for the glass of beer that sat there, downed the whole thing before placing the glass back on the table, then wiped the back of his hand across his top lip to clear the foam he felt there. “Hey, thanks for stealing my beer, man,” Jett said with a laugh. “I was thirty and Hot Pants over there wouldn’t give me my Tquetta. Fucker.” “O-kay. So what’s up with you tonight, Sut?” Jett asked, as he poured another round of beers from the pitcher. He waved his hand dismissively, huffing. “No big thang, just realizing my true place in this word.” He sat forward and whispered loudly, “I’m a f*****g w***e to a dragon. Uh-huh. I get f****d on a daily basis whether I spread my cheeks or not.” He then sat back and raised his hands over his head as he yelled, “That’s me! Sutton f*****g Valentine, the man with the last name of romance and the ass of a hooker! You know what’s worse than being a hooker? Me! At least they get paid for giving up their ass. Well f**k that. Not anymore! Do you hear me? Not. Any. More!” Gage reached out and grabbed his arms and pulled them back down. “Easy, man. Just try to relax okay?” Sutton noticed his friend’s gaze flick to a spot over his shoulder a few times as he spoke and he could hear the urgency in his voice. Sut turned around to look where Gage had looked and found Casimir, his mate, sitting two tables over with his friend Aracas and a few others, and they were staring right at him. Sut gave them an evil smile, then stood up and bent over the table, laying his torso flat on the surface with his ass in the air, pointing in their direction, then he looked back over his shoulder and met Casimir’s gaze. “There you go, Fuckbuddy, what are you waiting for?” Casimir closed his eyes and turned his head, which only pissed Sut off more. A slap hit him on the ass as someone walked past and said, “Sing it, sister.” Sut straightened and grabbed the man around the neck and pulled him close, so their chests were flush, then he gave the guy a sexy smile. “So, who are you, my little cupcake? Feel like getting out of here and having some fuck... I mean fun. No, I mean f**k,” Sut said, then laughed. “You are one gorgeous man and seem to need a good time, so sure, let’s get out of here,” the guy replied, and wrapped an arm around Sut’s waist. “Ooh, you’re pretty strong for a twink. I like that. Do you have another unexpected surprise for me? Say a c**k the size of an alpha’s?” Sut asked, as he batted his eyelashes and ran a hand down the man’s chest heading for his pants. “Okay, that’s enough of that,” Jett said from next to him as Sut felt a large hand wrap around his wrist and spun him away. At the same time another larger arm snaked around his waist and pulled him away from the sexy twink. “Sorry man, he’s not himself tonight.” He heard Logan say, as he was moved. “No problem. I understand. But hey, if you still want to hook up when you’re sober, just come and find me, sexy,” the guy said, then disappeared into the crowd. Sut was helped back into his seat and he immediately grabbed another glass from the table and started to drink. Jett reached out and took the glass and wrenched it out of his grasp, spilling some of the beer down his front. “Sit, man, what you do that for? I was rinking that.” “I know, and I also know, that you must have had a s**t ton of this crap human alcohol to make you this shitfaced. How about we just sit back and enjoy the show, then after you can come back to our place and crash in the guest room, then spend a few days with me and Zev over in Crystal and get away from things here for a while?” “You mean get away from the mate that doesn’t want me?” Sut asked softly, his voice showing his despair. Logan reached out a hand and grasped one of his. “I think that’s a great idea, Sut. Take a few days off and get out of here for a while. I’ll talk to the Chief. It might be just what you need.” “I agree,” Jensen said. “I was afraid of mating too at first and I needed some time to think things over without any pressure. Maybe that’s what you need?” “f**k that,” Ollie said, crossing his arms over his chest and glared toward the table where Casimir sat. “I say f**k him, and not in the way you’ve been doing.” “Ollie, you’re not helping,” Pascal chastised. Ollie turned back to face them. “Oh, and everything everyone has been doing about these two for all these months… hell, years, has been helping? Look, everyone has pretended to not know they were mates, or didn’t know, but when they found out they… we, kept our noses out of it, because we all know what happens if we interfere with a mating, but I say enough is enough. Sut, you’re f*****g adorable and a really nice guy. Any man would be f*****g lucky to get you to even notice them. You deserve so much more than what you’ve been getting. I say, Cas has had more than enough time to get over whatever s**t he’s using as an excuse to keep you at arm’s length. Sometimes, it’s better just to cut the cord and walk away.” “I kind of agree with Ollie, Sut,” Jett said, as he looked at his mate with a tight smile, then turned back to look at him. “I didn’t go through exactly what you’re going through, but I do understand. I was denied for twenty-five years by my mate. And it’s not that I’m trying to open old wounds that have long been forgiven,” he added quickly, as he grabbed Zev’s hand. “But, there does come a time where you have to do what’s best for you and your heart. That’s how we met remember? I couldn’t take it anymore and left, moving across the country to work with you guys. It wasn’t easy, but it was what I needed.” “It’s what I needed too, Sut. Like a slap in the face and a bucket of cold water to get me to pull my head out of my ass. The thought that I had finally lost Jett scared the s**t out of me. Maybe you need to give Cas a bit of that fear too to shake him up? If it doesn’t, then I say you have your answer and will know how to move forward,” Zev added. “Hell, I had to get thrown into the future from hell to wake my ass up. Maybe we could talk to Jen’s mom and see what she can do to help you and Cas out with this s**t,” Ollie suggested. Jensen sighed, “Ollie, leave my mother out of this please.” “I’m with Jett, Zev, and Ollie,” Dallas agreed. “You’ve given the asshole enough time. Now it’s time for you to think about you. You’ve put him and his insecurities first for long enough, now it’s time to put you first and if he can’t handle that, f**k him.” “Amen,” Devonte said, as he walked past their table and stopped. “As your Captain, I’m giving you a week off, Sut. Go devote that time to you and only you. As Dallas said, it’s time for you to put you first and everyone else can suck it.” Devonte raised his glass in salute, then took a drink, before moving on. “Looks like you’re on vacation, buddy,” Jett said with a laugh. “Yay for me,” Sut said happily, as he grabbed another beer and downed it. “I still think you should think about everything with a clear head before you make any drastic decisions,” Pascal replied. “Stop messing my fuzz. I’ve thought enough, thank you berry much. Now I think I think about me,” Sut replied, as he poked his own chest. “Now I think I think it time to move on,” he said waving his hand wide. “It’s Karetoki night and I think I want to sing. Who’s wip me?” Sut stood and walked away from his friends and headed toward the stage. Just as he was a few feet from his goal, someone gripped his arm and pulled him away. The room spun as he tried to get his feet to work and he stumbled. He was pulled into a hard chest and held in strong arms as the person tried to keep him steady. Sut looked up at beautiful royal blue eyes. He knew those eyes. He loved those eyes. But, those eyes didn’t love him. Sadness filled him and Sut tried to push away, but those arms tightened around him. “Let me go.” “I think we need to talk, Sut,” Casimir said. “No! We’ve done nough talk. Or I say, I did enough talk and you do a lot of defecting. Deflecting. No, I was right the first time, defecting. Time’s up. No more talking. No more f*****g. No more nothing. I’m done,” Sut said, and punctuated each word by thrusting his face closer to Casimir’s. Casimir’s eyes filled with pain, and Sut wanted to hold him and make that look go away, but he knew he couldn’t. He might be drunk as a skunk, but he still knew what was what, and if he bent to his mate again, things wouldn’t change. He couldn’t live with how they were anymore. He wouldn’t. He deserved better. Damn, I think I’m getting sober. * * * * “So what are we singing?” Jensen asked, as he joined Sut at the table, where there was a list of song choices. “I don’t know what you’re all singing, but I know what I am,” Sut replied, then turned and headed for the stage. He gave the cutie Deja a smile and told him his song choice, then walked onto the stage. His gaze moved around the crowded room but wouldn’t focus on any one thing. Everything was a bit hazy and there was a bright light in his face. Sut lifted his hand to block the brightness and suddenly it dimmed to a more comfortable level. Being sober kinda sucked, but for this song, he wanted to make his feelings clear to all that heard it. He lowered his hand and gripped the mic as the first notes of the song began to play. Suddenly, his gaze focused on a single face and Sut’s heart clenched in his chest. He loved that face, but at the same time... he kind of hated it. Casimir was so handsome and Sut loved looking at his mate, but after the history they already shared, pain always outweighed the pleasure of that face these days. His friends’ words rang in his mind and Sut knew they were right. He had given Casimir enough time. Now he needed to put himself first and protect his heart. As much as it killed him to walk away from his mate, there really was no other choice now. If he stayed, they would only continue as they had been and his heart would shatter every day, but if he gave up and moved on, the heartbreak could fully come, he would embrace it, and get over it. It was time for him to man up and reclaim his life. It was time for him to say goodbye to his mate, and the song he chose would do just that. These would be his last words to Casimir. After he was done, he would no longer speak to the man, or listen to him. Their lives would now go on separately. The time had come. Sut, waited for the right chord, then locked his gaze with Casimir’s and began to sing, “Keep Me Hanging On” by The Supremes, “Set me free, why don’t ya, babe? Get out my life, why don’t you, babe?” As the song went on, Sut was filled with all the hurt, anger, and despair that had taken over his life since meeting Casimir. He thought of all the times the man had loved on him, then denied him. The pain and anger began to consume him, and Sut glared at Casimir, letting all his thoughts and feelings show on his face as he sang directly to the man. “Why do you keep coming around and playing with my heart?” He screamed out, releasing the rage within. He watched Casimir’s face closely as he belted out the song, and for a moment he began to panic from the thought of walking away, but then Casimir closed his eyes and shook his head. The motion reignited the fire of anger within him, replacing the feeling of loss with one of determination. No more, damn it! No more! I won’t let him treat me like this anymore. He f***s me and leaves me, keeps me a secret and at arm’s length, then when I say I can’t take it anymore and want more, or I’m done, he has the nerve to look like he’s ashamed of me? Me? He’s the one who should be ashamed. Well, f**k you mate, and f**k us. I release you from our bond. Sut thought as he continued to sing directly to Casimir, the dragon shifter asshole, not Casimir his mate. They weren’t mates. Never had been, never would be. “You don’t want me for yourself, so let me find somebody else…” he sang, as he jumped from the stage and started walking toward Casimir, his gaze still locked on the man’s face. As he moved closer and the crowd stepped aside to let him through, Casimir opened his eyes and their gazes locked as Sut now stood only feet from the dragon. Then he changed the words and instead of ‘Why don’t you be a man about it and set me free’, Sut sang, “I’ll be a man about it, and I’ll set you free. Go on, get out of my life... Let me be! Set me freeeee!” The song came to an end and they remained frozen, just staring at one another. After a few moments when Casimir made no move to say or do anything, just continued to look at him, Sut felt the metal wall snap shut around his heart to the man. He was done. Sut dropped the mic and walked away.