Resisting my Step-Brother

My dad

“Murdered?” Liam repeated in shock. 

“Yeah, protecting me” I confessed. Liam sat up on his arms and lowered his brows as I got his full attention.

“How?” He asked.

“My mum had a dinner party with her work colleagues. It was a very important event for her company and her career. She had to go but my dad couldn’t, he had to stay at home and look after me” I explained.

“He gave me my dinner, tucked me into bed and read me my favourite bedtime story’” I smiled at the happy memory.

“Bright bear”. I took a moment before continuing.

“It was about a bear who didn’t understand a lot of things that happened to everyone during they’re life time; going to school, finding a job, even when they pass away. It sounds morbid but it was a happy story and was written to teach children that it’s okay to be frightened of big changes in life, that it was important to go through these transitions to achieve your next goal. I loved it and my dad always told me at the end that ‘even when people shut their eyes for the last time, they can still see you from above’” I bit my lip trying to hold my tears back.

“I never understood what he meant until he died. After he read me my story he would kiss the bridge of my nose and say ‘night night, sleep tight until the morning my little button’, button because of my cute button nose”. Liam smiled at the sweet nickname and I pressed my lips together.

“About 20 minutes after he had left my I room I could hear commotion going on downstairs and it had woke me up” my expression turned serious.

“I thought my dad had fallen over or something, or that my mum had come back and I wanted a good night kiss from her. I crept down the stairs and saw the front door was wide open. Being 5 years old, I didn’t think anything of it and peered into the living room. There were 4 men standing there, holding a gun to my dads head. I was so frightened, I didn’t know whether to run or stand still. They saw me standing there, shocked and scared and started yelling at my dad. I remember them saying something like ‘you f*****g lied, you aren’t alone’ and ‘tell us where the safe is and we will spare your lives’”. I couldn’t stop a tear from rolling down my face which caused Liam to move his hand forwards and grip mine.

“At this point my dad thought my life was in danger and that they were going to shoot me. I was his little girl, his princess and he refused to let anything bad happen to me. He stood from his seat and dashed towards me, causing the burglars to panic...”. My eyes were stinging from my soggy eyes. 

“They pointed the gun at me and that was the last thing I saw.. I shut my eyes and heard the shot being fired. It spooked the others and they ran off. I opened my eyes and looked at the one that remained, it was the guy that fired the gun. He had frozen with regret and fear before he too ran off” I sniffed and cleared my throat.

“When I looked down to my dad, I just saw a pool of blood that surrounded his body. His chest was still moving but was very slow. I thought he just had a scratch, I didn’t understand the severity of his injury and told him I would get him a plaster. He found this amusing and held my hands in his. He told me to go to the phone and ring the police which I did before returning to him. I could feel his grasp weaken and I was crying hysterically”

Liam shimmied towards me and held me close to his chest.

“He told me ‘always remember my little button, even if my eyes close for the last time, I will always be able to see you from above’. That’s when he took his final breath and closed his eyes” I finally said. Liam was quiet as he tried to process the extreme heartache I endured as a child. I sat up and sniffed.

“The police came and took me away from my dads body. My mum was in bits and gripped me tightly as they wheeled his body out in a bag. My mum was never the same and made it her mission to find love again after she had grieved for years”. Liam was shocked and didn’t know what to say. He kissed me gently and tucked my hair behind my ear. 

“I’m so sorry you had to go through that” he whispered and then wiped a tear from my cheek. 

“It means the world to me that you were willing to share that with me” he said. I smiled and looked down at my hands.