Because I Want To

Chapter 1

A loud thud jerked my attention away from the bills of the extremely handsome, but completely broke, Trev Moore. I had been coming to his shabby apartment every Saturday for the last few weeks, trying to help him figure out how to pay the bills before they got worse.

For the last ten years, Trev had been obsessively trying to find his baby sister. During this search, he had managed to accumulate a good amount of debt. So, when his Marine buddies, Jack and Jordan, got a hold of him and told him that they had Lizzie, he knew he had to face the music, so to speak. Especially if he planned to move here permanently.

This is where I come in: Vie Tremaine! Accountant extraordinaire! Savior of peoples' checkbooks! More often than not, I am either despised or loved unconditionally.

However, all that didn't matter. Bills were not the reason Trev had stormed out of the living room. The only clue to his behavior was he had just been reading a book about b**m of all things.

"Something wrong?" I called out.

The only response to my question was angry mumbling from the kitchen and the slamming of the refrigerator door. Trev stomped back into the living room still mumbling and paced in front of the couch. He paused only long enough to take long pulls from the root beer in his hand. He sucked it down like he was trying hard to get drunk from it.

It was hard not to allow my eyes to wander down his well-cut body as they so desperately wanted to. Especially in his tight jeans that cupped his backside like a pair of lover's hands. His t-shirt was well worn, but that was just fine with me because it hung to his shoulders, showing off the broad expanse perfectly. I felt a very girly sigh try to fall from my lips, but I forcefully swallowed it back. Still waiting, I watched his strong neck muscles work as he chugged the drink down until it was completely gone.

"I cannot believe my baby sister is actually into that bullshit!"

Well, that answered that question.

“I can't believe that I never knew Jack and Jordan were like that!" he shouted and waving his hand accusingly at the book that he had thrown across the room.

"What? Bondage?" I asked just for clarification.

"Yes! Who in their right mind would want to be tied up and f****d like that?" Trev continued as he stomped around.

I assumed he was looking for something else to throw. But with how little he owned, there was no way he was going to find anything. For example, when I had first started coming here, I had to bring my own cup.

"I think you're overreacting, Trev," I told him in a calm tone.

"Overreacting... OVERREACTING?! It's bad enough that my sister has two… two…"

"Lovers?" I supplied helpfully.

"Yes! And now I find out that they could possibly be whipping her on a regular basis! And what the hell is blood play?" he cried.

In his rage, he scrubbed his hand through his sandy blond hair that was almost exactly like his sisters. Sighing in resignation, I almost ran my hand through my own shoulder-length brown hair. Master Reed had asked me to help Trev with whatever he needed. So, I had helped him find an apartment, do a bit of job hunting, and showed him a few interesting places around town. Somehow, I had never thought the ins and outs of bondage would be on my list of things to explain to him.

I rubbed my forehead as I tried to figure out what I could say to help him understand something as controversial as D/s. I groaned in silent frustration when nothing brilliant or life-altering came to mind.

Being tongue-tied was not unusual for me. I really was better with numbers than I was with people. I had recently found out that people had started calling me Ice Princess; everyone apparently mistaking my shyness for coldness. Of course, it didn't help that the very few times I was asked to play that I hadn't been able to respond. I shook myself out of the memories of the last few depressing, horrible experiences.

On the other hand, I had never minded coming over to Trevs. I enjoyed the short conversations we have had and the fact he never demanded more than that.

Until now.

"Look, it's honestly no big deal," I began.

"No big deal? Vie, my baby sister is a willing part of an abusive relationship!"

"It's not abuse, Trev. It is a lifestyle choice! Nothing is happening that she hasn't agreed to," I tried to explain.

Trev stopped pacing and gave me a suspicious look.

"You sure are defending this pretty hard. Are you into this crap as well?" Trev snarled at me with his bright blue eyes flashing.

My back straightened with anger at his insult.

"Yes, I'm into this crap as well," I told him in a cold tone.

Trev sauntered over to me and bent down until our noses practically touched. His blue eyes flashed with anger and something else… something hotter. A flare of interest was hidden behind all the anger and contempt.

"So, you like to be tied up and tormented as well?" he growled.

My mouth opened and closed like a fish out of water. No words, no sounds came out even as I heard my answer screaming in my head.

"So, if I were to cuff you to my bed right now and take advantage of you, you'd let me? Even if it was for no other reason than to use you as my very own little s*x toy."

Did I detect a bit of hope in his voice? I wondered to myself. Unbelievably my body started heating up in response to his words. Saying I was startled by my own reaction would be putting it mildly. Dirty talk was something that had always been a laughing point for me up until now. Now, the intensity in Trev's eyes combined with his words sent shivers down my spine and my thoughts scattered.

Swallowing a few times to get past the lump in my suddenly dry throat, I tried once again to say something. I was desperate to distract him and myself from the s****l tension that was escalating in the room. It would be insane to allow myself to get mixed up with a man like Trev. He was sexier than sin and more than enough for any hot-blooded woman to want. But he was also way out of my league. Not to mention he viewed my kink as something to despise. Not exactly a great basis for b**m.

Yet, there was nothing I wanted more right now than to crawl on my knees to his bedroom and beg him to show me if that passion carried over to the sheets.

Dark, forbidden fantasies that had been teasing my brain since I met him began to play like a slide show. My eyelids drooped down, and I felt myself sway towards Trev.

The shrill ring of his phone rescued me from this lust-induced trance. He stormed over to where his cell phone laid and snapped it up so fast, I thought he was going to break it.

"What?" Trev snapped into the phone.

He frowned and stepped into the kitchen beyond hearing range. Away from his intoxicating presence, my senses came back. Panic consumed me and I seized the opportunity to round up my stuff, so I could make a hasty exit. Maybe once I got away from this place, I could convince myself that, despite the racing of my heart and the dampness of my panties, there was no way I could get together with this man.

The door behind me creaked open before I was even halfway down the hall.

“Vie? Why are you leaving?"