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Chapter 4-1
Chapter 4 The first week was hell. Andreas had seen it coming: the exhaustion, the baby blues, the frustration. The wreck that the pregnancy had left behind of his body would be hard to cope with—the sagging belly, the bleeding, the need for more sanitary towels than he’d gone through between the ages of twelve and twenty-two—of course it would put him in a foul mood. Of course he was going to struggle. And he remembered his mother getting baby blues after each new sibling like clockwork, so wanting to cry along with Beatriz during the night feeds wasn’t entirely unexpected either. The urge to kill Erik, though? That was a new one. Or rather, the sustained feeling was. Andreas often wanted to smother Erik with a pillow once or twice a week, in short and savage bursts. Andreas would ha
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