Untamed

Settling in

Over the next couple of days, Ruby showed me around our dormitory. We were an all-girls dorm from the bottom all the way to the top floor. Living in one of the high-rise dormitories on campus which is only a walk away from our classrooms, the library, fitness facilities and on-campus restaurants.

Ruby also introduced me and Janelle to a few of her friends who were living in the dorms. They invited us out with them to a pizzeria restaurant on our first night and shared all the great places to eat with us. Ruby was also kind enough to take us step by step through how our meals worked, where we get our food and how the p*****t works since it is included in our fees. She also helped us to get our textbooks and timetables.

Janelle and I had our orientation on Monday morning where we met our professors, got shown around campus and got a chance to meet our fellow students before our first and official day started.

Ruby was gone by the time I woke up. Janelle returned from the gym centre and caught up with me on my way over to the showers. I wasn’t going to lie. It felt extremely awkward to share a shower with a bunch of girls while everyone was dressed in their birthday suits. Janelle, on the other hand, had no care in the world sharing her nudity with other girls.

“Don’t worry. You will get used to it.” Janelle assured me when she noticed my discomfort while getting dressed.

I wasn’t a shy girl but it was new to me. Especially since the girls around here walked around with confidence and unbothered with the rest of us.

“I like the tattoo by the way.” She complimented, referring to the rebel tattoo that was close to my waistline. It was sometimes difficult to explain the reason behind it and what it truly meant. When people hear the word rebel, they believe it has to do with war rebels who start wars, burn down cities and start protests. Or adults would comment about me being a reckless kid who is throwing away her life but the truth behind it was that all I care about is being my own individual. Believe in standing up for my own opinion despite what anyone else thinks.

Being untamed is not about smoking c***k, drinking till you’re rendered unconscious, or beating the crap out of anyone that crosses your path. It’s all about refusing to follow a crowd that forces you to think the same way they do. I don’t compromise my individuality for anyone. I am honest, straight forward and sure as hell tell it like it is.

“Have you been checking me out?” I joked. I was wearing a shirt that didn’t cover my stomach completely and the ink lines were exposed.

She at least caught the joke when she smiled. I grabbed my things and followed her out. “What was that fight about between you and Ruby the other day?” I asked walking beside her.

When I returned from the beach later that day, she was nowhere to be found and Ruby had her nose stuck in a book. They said nothing to each other during the weekend and Janelle tried to be scarce as much as possible.

“Something bad happened to her in high school and I was blamed for it.” She answered.

“Does Ruby know that?” Janelle shrugged.

“It won’t matter. The person who is responsible has horns at the back of her head. A pretty face but a soul as black as the night.” She grumbled with an edge of hate laced on each word.

We came to an abrupt halt in unison when we found a very tall guy with the broadest shoulders I have ever seen, standing in front of our room. He was facing the door and wanted to raise his hand to knock on it but I cut in.

“Are you looking for someone?” He didn’t look familiar and neither does Ruby and Janelle have boyfriends that I know of.

I heard a gasp beside me when the guy turned his head to face us. “Damian?”

Did she know him? “What are you doing here?” She then asked.

His hazel-brown eyes narrowed. “So, the rumours are true.” He said, making no sense but it seems as if Janelle understood.

“How do you know where I live?” She questioned. "How did you even know I am here?"

He just shrugged. “Your rumours? Does it start with a certain someone I am sharing a room with?” She then asked him.

“Do you really think Ruby will talk to me? She barely makes sense when she is around guys.” I arched an eyebrow and he must have seen that I wasn’t impressed.

“She’s intelligent. Not many people can keep up with her because they lack a certain skill.” I told him.

I might find him attractive but he was rude. He is a guy that is used to being popular that he lost dignity in the process. “Are you referring that I am illiterate?” He asked.

“Well, are you?” I saw the shock in his eyes before he could mask it.

“I wasn’t implying that there is something wrong with her.” He pulled up his shoulders and then his eyes moved back to Janelle.

I decided to leave this conversation by excusing myself while letting them talk. I started getting ready to go to class when the door opened and Janelle entered the room alone.

“An ex-boyfriend of yours?” I asked, gathering the stuff that I was going to need for class.

“If only it was that easy.” She grumbled.

“Friends with benefits?”

“Something like that.” I quirked an eyebrow.

She looked at me after putting her stuff away. “The girl I told you about just a few minutes ago. Well, she was my best friend and his girlfriend. I liked him before she even knew him. When puberty hit, she finally noticed him like the rest of the girls. She didn’t take our friendship into consideration and betrayed me when she started dating him. Even when she knew how I felt about him.”

“Why not steal him back It’s obvious that he still likes you. He basically touching you with his eyes.” Janelle snorted at my question.

“That’s like playing chess with the devil. Knowing that it is a losing battle because he will only cheat his way through.” Janelle remarked.

“I left Los Angeles to get away from everyone. Coming back here, I thought at least they did the same but imagine my surprise when I learned that I am sharing a room with a girl who hates my guts and bonus. My crush is too illiterate to even comprehend that she was lying and is still blaming me for all the s**t that went down.” She was starting to lose her mind.

“I would offer you a really strong drink but we have a class that is starting in less than thirty minutes.” I didn’t want to miss my first day.

“I just need a minute to catch my breath.” She replied, sitting down on her bed. She pushed her fingers through her hair and let out a shuddering breath. I didn’t know what to do but stand in silence while giving her some space.

My only friends back home are Camille and Sasha. We all have our own problems to deal with and we were not really compassionate people. We handle our troubles on our own terms without showing tears or vulnerability because we got hurt by people we trusted. All we talk about is our past. Not some boys we are crushing on or how a boy broke our hearts. 

This is a first for me to have someone share their experience with boys with me and I have only met Janelle, and I barely know her. “You must think that I am a nutcase.” She muttered.

“On the contrary. I am not a person who judges people because I know what it feels like.” She raised her head. Her eyes blinking with surprise.

I chose to be different and the world doesn't particularly understand different. 

“If a guy makes you feel like this, why bother getting mad about it? He moved on. So, could you.” I suggested. 

“I guess, you are probably right.” She said sighing and standing up from her bed. “If he ever cared about me. He would have shown it by believing in me.” I shrugged.

“You are giving me an impression that you don’t really do this kind of thing often?” She noted.

“What? You want me to lie to you and tell you to run after him?” I asked. “Or comfort you by telling you that it will get better? I honestly don’t know what is going to happen or how he feels.” I added.

She gave me a quizzical look. “Have you ever had a crush on someone?” I shook my head.

“Virgin?” Again, I shook my head. I am not proud of it when my hormones got the best of me when I was a teen. I do regret giving it away in a blink of an eye but there was nothing I could do to get it back.

“Love is a curse.” I opinioned.

“Guess, it’s safe to say that you don’t believe in fairy-tales?”

“No, because the people who wrote them are the ones who got hurt along the way and the only way, they can express their hurt is by writing about it.” A fairy-tale is a myth. Even a happy ending. It’s a wish. Something we desire but doesn’t truly exist. People who write fairy tales are the ones who want to fix their broken world and the only way they can do it is by ink. 

She quirked an eyebrow. “Who ruined your childhood?”

“My mother.”