Rejected and Regretted

Six

☆ AVRIL ☆

“So,” Koen started as he casually took a bite off his avocado toast. “You wanted to know why I train by myself, right?”

Although he wasn’t speaking loud, his voice still echoed through the walls of the expansive, mostly empty room. When he invited me for breakfast, I did not grasp that we would be eating alone in his luxurious private dining room. I should have seen it coming though, considering food at the cafeteria was only served after warrior training.

And I cursed myself for falling straight into his trap.

At least he’d had the decency to put on a shirt as we sat directly across from each other at the awkwardly empty ten person dining table. He looked quite relaxed, and even slightly pleased by my discomfort, which only further annoyed me. On second thought, maybe it was good that he had been able to detect my uneasiness; he would probably assume that I, as an omega, was nervous about being in a room reserved for high-ranking members, sharing a private meal with the alpha.

“More like why you were training at the borders,” I replied. Especially when you claim it’s so dangerous to roam the outskirts of the territory without company, I mentally added.

“Can I let you in on a secret, Avril?” he asked, and my ears perked up. Cautious, but curious, I nodded, and he went on, “In all honesty, I just crave some alone time every now and then. As an alpha, I’m always surrounded by people. The ever-lasting attention grows overwhelming at times.”

I immediately found myself relating to him. After being pretty much invisible my entire life, it was hard for me to get used to people constantly coming to me, whether to check on me or to look for my guidance. The first year was actually nice; I felt loved for once. But it wasn’t long before the lack of privacy became suffocating. It took me a while to learn to balance my personal life and my duties.

Then, I realized what I was doing and almost threw up. How could I relate to him? We had nothing in common. Besides, no matter how good of a liar he was, I couldn’t believe his confession. Koen had been born with a silver spoon in his mouth. There was no way he didn’t enjoy being in the spotlight.

“He must be trying to earn your trust, so you will put in a good word for your alpha,” Kea wisely pointed out. “Just pretend you fell for it. Use this as an opportunity to get closer to him.”

She was right. It took all of my strength, but I managed to sound sympathetic as I said, “I didn’t know. I’m sorry you feel that way.”

“Oh, don’t be. It’s not like I don’t enjoy being with my family, and I still join my warriors for most sparring sessions,” he revealed. “I just need my space sometimes. I find it helps me focus.”

A thought immediately crossed my mind, and the words flew out of my mouth before I even realized I was speaking. “Is that why your relationship with your luna ended? Because you needed space?”

My eyes widened as I grasped what I had just asked. Koen seemed just as shocked, his eyebrows raised as he was caught off guard, but I lowered my head before I could properly study his reaction. What did I care what happened to his chosen mate? I wasn’t the least interested in who he screwed, married, and killed.

Or at least that’s what I wanted to believe. Deep down, I knew the scar left by his rejection had never properly healed. Desperate for closure, I longed for a reason why he would deny me for a woman he would later abandon as well.

Maybe that was just who he was - a heartbreaker.

Stealing a glance at Koen, who was still awfully quiet, I witnessed a shadow dance in his eyes. At first, I thought it was fury, likely driven by my audacity, but I suddenly realized it was something else. It seemed like…regret.

“It was a political marriage,” he blurted out at last, leaving me baffled. “We only stayed together for as long as we had to. Nerine and I were never in love.” He made a brief pause, lowering his voice to add, “At least I wasn’t.”

I didn’t know how to process this piece of information. The loving glances they shared, the passionate kisses, the smiles and laughter… Was it all fake? Again, I caught myself trying and failing to understand what game he was playing, but even if I didn’t know, there was one thing I couldn’t deny.

Koen’s capacity of putting on such a good act proved how skilled he was at deceiving others, and if I wanted to succeed in my mission, I’d have to be even better than him.

As if he had sensed me stiffening, he leaned closer, staring into my eyes. My heart raced, almost as if I knew what he was about to say. “Look, Avril, I… When I found out about you and I being-”

“Alpha Koen!” A male voice called from the other side of the room. My former mate and I barely had time to acknowledge the man’s sudden presence when he poked his head through the door. “I’m terribly sorry to disturb you.”

Koen hesitated to break his gaze away from mine, but after sighing, he forced himself to look at his beta. “Is something wrong, Mike?”

“Two warriors broke into a fight during training. I thought you would rather handle the situation yourself,” his second-in-command revealed.

Another sigh, heavy and tired, broke through Koen’s lips. After nodding at his Beta, his eyes found mine again, and I held my breath. “I’ll be busy the whole day. But if you’d like to meet me by sunset, we can continue our conversation.”

I swallowed dry. Did I want to continue this conversation? The young rejected omega inside cried ‘yes!’ but the hardened alpha I had become had heard enough. Still, I couldn’t forget my mission. After I nodded in agreement, Koen smiled sympathetically at me, immediately leaving with his beta, who didn’t miss the opportunity to shoot me a death glare before following his alpha.

And I was left alone to brace myself for yet another meeting I most definitely did not want to have with the man who messed with my head.