“I know we have a lot to talk about…” These words would tear me from the perfection that made up this embrace. But as he would continue to speak, his hands would remain on my cheeks for the second portion of these words, before falling finalized at my hips.
“But I promise you...I am going to take it slow...That’s non-negotiable.” I smirked as my eyes became bewitched by the full presence of his lips tempting me with the sweet ache of them pushed against mine. He seemed to take note of this as he would move close enough to me so I was able to feel how his heart raced the same as mine, until his eyes fell to my parted grin.
“We never got a chance to eat dinner...Are you hungry?” He interrupted this perfect moment, the depth of change noticed of him by me in this instance as the ‘old Warren’ would have pulled my virtue from my body in a few simple moves, and yet, this one was a complete gentleman. In the wish to keep from running this moment left sweet, I agreed before following him into the kitchen, where Estella was preparing the dough for the next day’s breakfast. Her eyes leaped to us in relief to see us together without anger cast between us, but then in worry to the thought of why we were coming to her-possibly to release her of her employ.
“Is there something you would like?” She asked nervously as I suddenly witnessed Warren release his hand from my waist as he moved to his most consistent maid.
“I want you to take the night off.” Her eyes looked at him, having been completely stunned. “But before you do that...would you mind offering the same to the rest of the staff.”
“Sir? You’re certain? You would not need us tonight?”
“You all deserve a night off...and besides, I want to make dinner for my wife…” Estella’s eyes illuminated with the stolen vigor now returned to her chocolate irisies. Leaping to him and giving a large hug that lasted only a moment, she picked up the hem of her skirt while making her way to make good on the task requested. In her absence, my eyes would fall to Warren as he made his way throughout the kitchen, searching the cabinets in a room he was clearly unfamiliar with, but made an attempt that warmed my heart. I adored the way his forehead would line in confusion as he would leave an abundance of spices in place, along with the cute way his lips would purse when reading the labels of items he was astonished to find in his residence. I smirked at this as he would turn to face me.
“Am I allowed to know what you’re making?” I would finally ask as the entire island matching the black and gold marble throughout the entire kitchen had now been covered in a mess of items from maple syrup to barbeque seasoning.
“I’d tell you, but I’m not one hundred percent sure quite yet…” I offered a light chuckle before he would mirror this expression, becoming lost in each other’s eyes, before he would begin by reaching for the flour and clearing his throat while offering me a final smile before beginning. However, as he managed to knead the dough about halfway pressed to the desired thickness, hands covered in flour, he suddenly realized he had been too ignorant to remove the buttons on his dress shirt to keep him from staining this ensemble from any future edible debris.
“Here…” I spoke upon sensing this struggle as I pulled myself from the barstool and into the direction of the man coated in flour as I kept my eyes focused on his hands, all the while, feeling his eyes kept to me. Once the button would be removed from its hold, I pulled the fabric higher upon his arms, designating my eyes to keep from meeting with his that I became lost in this desire, while the second hand would catch my eyes for an entirely different reason.
“It’s okay…” He spoke carefully as I ran my finger over the raised scars on his wrists as tears filled my eyes. When he noticed this, he quickly wiped his hands on the nearby dishtowel to pull me in another embrace. I was allowed a moment of emotion before he would take me carefully by his grasp and rub the outsides of my arms.
“I’m okay…”
“Can I ask you something?” I inquired as I could feel my heart burn with an ache of mutual pain as I was well aware what would become of him once I asked this question. And yet, he would agree to answer with a bob of his head.
“You want to know why I did it.” I nodded as he would let out an exhale before taking my hands to ensure he kept me in this ideal comfort.
“My father and I spoke about you...and he was actually admiring the way you stood up to him...But the things he said about me…” He paused for a moment to steady himself. “He’s always been able to revert me back to that sixteen year old boy desperate for his approval...And I don’t know why I believed him...but he convinced me that if I really cared about you, I’d let you be with someone better...so I drank and when I realized what I’d done...I thought about how you’d never trust me again...especially after what happened with Angelina...I knew I couldn’t convince you that I wouldn’t ever hurt you-because I did...But when I sat there...YOU were also the sole reason I fought against it-”
“But it just wasn’t enough…” I spoke these words as tears fell down my cheeks once more, only now, he bowed his head-his eyes searching the floor for a moment, before finding mine through my own misty expression.
“It’s because I was feeling sorry for myself-not because you aren’t enough...But tonight...you told me I’m worth a second chance...and I’m going to make damn sure that I don’t make you a liar.” For a moment, I watched him look at my lips, as if going to kiss me, before retreating in the final moment.
“Can I ask a favor?” I asked as he would begin to fondle the tresses of my hair forced to my face from my emotions taking over me. Once again, he agreed.
“Can we move forward? Pretend that that night didn’t happen?” He offered a weak smile before slowly nodding, despite the fact his following words would speak in disagreement.
“I don’t want to be the reason you’re hurting-ever. But...even if we don’t talk about it...I can’t let it go...Because it took that moment to change me...But I CAN move forward; call it a catalyst for me to get off my ass to try and be what you deserve.” He would press a kind touch to my cheek before wiping the final tear from my cheek as I looked to him in wonder at how he could manage to go from possessive and controlling to sweet and compassionate, but I did not want to question it.
“Do you want to help?” I paused for a moment before smacking my lips and giving him a nervous expression.
“I have only ever cooked what came in boxes with instructions, and I always managed to mess it up…”
“Well...if you’ll let me...I look forward to teaching you…” Our eyes would meet for a moment as I would bow my head in agreement while he cleaned off a corner of the counter as I was instructed to heat the meat and add a specific series of spices, before I turned and found how he made a concoction of cheeses, egg, and parsley together as I looked at him questionably as he found amusement in this.
“You have to brush egg wash over the pasta...I’ll get everything else ready…” I nodded, focusing on my task while turning temporarily to find him already looking back to me. Immediately, I could feel a blush form on my cheeks while using my artistic skills to finish my job in record time. Using a spoon, he was now using his own concoction to leave balls of this mixture before us, while leading a second line of pasta over this mixture; adding the meat at the final moment before this layer was added.
“I used to make this with my grandmother when I was little. It’s a literal twist on raviolis...so instead of using a pizza cutter to seal off the edges, you twist it into more of a breadstick and then the cheese and the meat all ooze out of it when it’s cooking-it was fun to eat it as a kid...I guess I kind of made it in muscle memory…” He scoffed as I smiled widely at him.
“Sounds like fun…” He showed me how to do this as I would do so before managing to ruin it as he would be forced to come behind me and press his fingers through my own to show me how to twist it properly to keep from the mixture popping out each end as this had been my outcome. But I had lost focus rather quickly to the feeling of his toned body at my back tensing to these movements as he would drag his nose along my neck, followed by the tracing of his lips, as the beep from the oven would make him scoff. Carrying the tray of finished pastries to the door, he would slip the cuisine inside before now pulling a bottle of wine from another shelf.
“I want to know absolutely everything you’re willing to tell me…” He expressed while leaning on the edge of the counter as I was taking a sip of my beverage. With a grin, I would ask where he wished for me to start, as he shrugged and answered with ‘whatever you want me to know’. I would begin with my mother, describing her loss as this would bring understandable tears. Once I had finished, he explained the loss of his own mother as this back and forth pleasant conversation would continue, even throughout dinner. Picking at the twisted ravioli that was almost a work of art on its own, he would drizzle the top of the fresh meal with marinara sauce made from scratch, before we continued this pleasant conversation.
We managed to speak of everything from traumas of our childhood to favorite meals of the last week. It was refreshing to not worry about him pulling me into him with aggression or pushing me away with fear. Yet, I was somewhat disappointed that he would not act on what lies behind his eyes as the moments would present themselves to do so and remain in chivalry; and he refrained. As he would brush sauce from the bottom of my lip, taking it between his lips, and making this somehow the most erotic moment we had shared, he would then clear his throat and pull the dishes into the dishwasher before looking at the clock.
“It’s getting late…” He spoke with a kind smile.
“You’re tired?”
“You’re not?”
I shook my head ‘no’ as he would bow his head for a moment as I reached for his hand, feeling his fingers interlace within my own as we began to walk down the corridor of our shared rooms.
“Thank you….” I spoke sweetly as he released my hand outside the door as I used this grip to now push the entry open as I saw him now take a single step backwards from me.
“Thank YOU…”
“Did you want to come in? We can talk-”
“Full honesty?” He questioned as I nodded.
“If I cross over that threshold…” He clenched his jaw. “We won’t be talking…” My brows rose.
“Oh really?” I challenged him with a playful glare while crossing my hands across my chest. “And what would we be doing?” I swear I saw a tint of crimson form on his cheeks as he would look away with disbelief to my tormenting teasing of him.
“You aren’t done torturing me, are you?”
“It’s been a really long day and I’m not privy to a lot of what you could be referring to...and of course, I’m very innocent-” He c****d his brow.
“Good night, Aubrey…” He attempted to turn to his room, before I took hold of his forearm and brought him into the very threshold he spoke of.
“I want you to tell me…”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea…”
“Afraid you can’t handle yourself?” His head bowed for a moment as I wished to retract these words immediately, before I watched his eyes darken to me-but in a way that still remained reserved.
“I know I can’t.” His words took my breath away as I saw him drop his eyes to my lips. Knowing he would not bring himself to me as he wanted to remain true to his former words, I would move closer to him as he would tense to me immediately.
“Is this okay?” I asked as he would slowly nod as I led my touch to his chest. His jaw clenched, his pulse was visible by the side of his neck, and his hands were taking hold of the fabric of my dress in place of my waist itself. It was clear I held an effect on him.
“And this?” I questioned as I lifted one hand to his cheek, followed by the other.
I wouldn’t speak again as I would just allow the tips of my toes to rise to him until I was able to press my lips into his for a kiss. I would smile against his kiss, while he walked me slowly into the frame at my back. Wrapping his fingers in my hair, now freed from its ponytail from dinner, he would introduce me to a thorough French Kiss before I would begin to grow breathless from the way he kissed. It wasn’t quick in possession and short in seduction, it was tender and long-which somehow made me more winded. But he would understand this and then drop his lips to my neck and finally my chest, which was exposed by this dress, before he pressed his hands to my waist and returned to his side of the door frame.
“What’s wrong?”
“We aren’t going to do this tonight…”
“You don’t want to?” I asked, taking my hands back on his chest, as he presented his over mine to keep them still.
“Not yet...Not when I still have to prove something to you…”
“Prove what?”
“That you can trust me...And to do that...I’m going to wait…And I can already tell you it’s gonna kill me...But I want s*x off the table...I want to learn about you and court you...and then when it’s right...I’ll make you mine and I’ll be yours…” He would kiss my forehead before moving back to his room.
“Goodnight, Aubrey…”