Chapter 1
1988 Words
Rachel
“Come here,” he commanded with his raspy voice. Fear quickly coated me. “Rachel,” he sounded even more demanding. He was not serious!
“Please.”
“Damn it, girl! I don’t like to repeat anything twice, but I always find it no mind when I’m with you. For the last f*****g time, come…here…”
“No, Cameron.” I knew how cruel Cameron was, how he loved bullying me. But this…this was way out of the line. Cameron knew what I loved and treasured. He wouldn’t do it to that state, would he? Remembering this was Cameron, maybe he would.
And that…scared the s**t out of me.
So, I ran.
“f**k!” Before I could reach the door, Cameron’s strong arms wrapped around my stomach, trapping me on his chest as I screeched.
“No! Help! Cameron, let me go! Please! Somebody, help me!” I prayed for someone could hear me and rescue me from this madman. Although I knew no one was around in his house. I cursed Cameron for bringing me here.
Cameron threw me to his bed. His signature minty and sandalwood scent entered my nostrils. The calm was quickly banished when he flipped me over and trapped my hands with his knees. With him straddling my hips, struggling was useless. Cameron was big. Way too big for a man’s size. At least, that was what I thought. “Cameron!” The fear doubled when I felt him…grabbing my hair. I froze. I couldn’t breathe. I used to love him touching my hair. Now I was scared of what he was going to do it now. “Cameron, I beg you. Please don’t do this,” I pleaded.
“It’s needed, Dolly.” It was needed? What, just because a guy talked to me? He was nothing. Because I— My eyes widened when he harshly gripped my hair. I could feel the scissor he’d been holding onto coming closer. The sight of the silver metal almost made my heart stop beating. I wrestled under him again, mentally begging him to stop this madness and his unreasonableness. This was crazy! “Stop moving, or you will end up bald, and you have to be homeschooled for the rest of your high school life.”
“f**k you, Cameron! Why are you doing this to me?”
I never thought the word that came out of his mouth. “Punishment, Rachel.” Punishment? Why? I didn’t do anything wrong. Cameron was never in control of my life. But he always considered what I did was wrong in his eyes and his smart brain.
“Fu—” That was it. I heard it. I felt it. Everything was gone. Everything I dreamed of.
As Cameron jumped off the bed, I remained unmoving. Somebody, tell me this was just a dream and when I woke up my crown was still there. But when I slowly brought my hand to my hair, the strands I loved were not there anymore. It was gone. Cut off. Almost all of them!
My long hair was gone.
Raising my body, I turned to Cameron. I didn’t look into his eyes; my gaze fell to his hands. One holding the scissors, I called it the scythe. The other one…grabbing my brown hair. That was when the realization hit me again like a tornado. I finally met his eyes. I didn’t even wait; my tears quickly washed my face. “How could you? How could you do this to me! My hair. Oh, my God. My hair!” I sobbed uncontrollably. How could he? I let my hair grow because I knew Cameron loved long hair. And he just destroyed everything!
Cameron threw my mutilated hair to the bed. “Consider this as a reminder, Dolly,” he coldly said. I didn’t have to look at him to know he was mocking me and he was holding back his evil laugh.
He left me in his room.
I hated him.
I didn’t love him anymore. I didn’t want to love him. I didn’t want him anymore.
Because I… “I f*****g HATE YOU!”
I snapped my eyes open. Throwing my body up, I felt nauseous instantly. f**k! I needed water. I needed air. Quickly pushing the blanket away, I ran to the bathroom. Immediately vomited everything into the toilet. I groaned as I squeezed my stomach to let them all out. How I wished I could vomit the memory. The depraved memory. The memory of Cameron ruined me. Humiliated me. “f**k…” I moaned and slowly raised my body. Looking at the disgusting content in my toilet, all I saw was Cameron’s face. “f**k you,” I scowled. I flushed and smashed the lid closer.
I sat on the lid and rested my face on my palms. Why the hell I had that dream again?
Wait.
Panic washed me as I ran to the mirror, checking my hair. They were still there. Oh, thank God. Must be because Zara, my co-worker, told me my hair was too long already. She advised me to cut them. I knew when to cut my hair. I never liked it when someone told me. It instinctively sent me back to my disgracing day. I knew Zara didn’t have any bad intentions; she was just reminding me because she knew sometimes, I forgot.
I looked in the mirror again. My eyes fell on my long straight brown hair. Yes, they were long now. Too long, even I felt I had to cut them. I usually did it myself until sixteen. Now, I couldn’t even hold a scissor without worrying Cameron’s face would appear in front of me. I swore I could see him smirking and laughing like the devil he was.
Anything regarding scissors freaked me out. I remembered I searched for a scissor just to cut a paper. When I had it, my hands trembled, jittering me. I couldn’t do it. It was embarrassing that I had to ask people’s help to do something as simple as cutting paper. All because I had aichmophobia. “f*****g hell,” I cursed again and pushed myself from the vanity.
I quickly freshened myself. Once I finished, I wrapped myself with a towel and walked out. Looking at my schedule on my phone, I had to see my professor at eight. It was seven now. I better get ready. It was the third week after the new semester started. I was in my final year. I couldn’t be late for the consultation, even skipping it.
Aren’t you pushing yourself too much?
That was what my sweet mother told me. “No, I don’t,” I muttered. Besides, what was she expecting from me? My dad? Lucas, my brother? Everybody knew. Knew, but they couldn’t do anything. I had had enough.
You’re sure you won’t regret it, sis?
“I’m sure.”
Checking my bag one last time, okay I got everything. Today shouldn’t be long. I hoped Professor Dunn would accept my proposal. He had asked me to change it three times already. I zipped my backpack fast so I wouldn’t question myself again and stomped out of the bedroom.
“Morning,” greeted Mackenzie’s sleepy voice.
“Morning.” I moved closer to her. She only wore an oversized white sweater. His pale skin glowed brighter. Her platinum blonde hair shone like a sun. Jesus, this woman was like a goddess reincarnation. Well, looking at her parents, people wouldn’t question why she was so beautiful everybody wanted to be like her.
Mackenzie’s parents were the famous Hollywood Actress and Singer Linda Browning and the well-known owner of Browning Enterprises, Alexander Browning. Mackenzie was four years older than me. She was working as an actress and a model. However, she had her own dream. She wanted to open her own boutique. She loved clothing since middle school. She wanted to design her own clothes, but she always said she was shitty at drawing.
And since our parents were friends, it was natural Mackenzie and I clicked with each other. And I liked her. She had her father’s face with her mother’s demeanor. We used to promise each other. Mackenzie opened her own boutique while I handled my salon. We had this concept guests could look for their clothes first and then style their hair right after. A dream that would stay a dream. I’d abandoned it. I couldn’t even hold a scissor, let alone cut their hair. I would only make them bald.
“Coffee?” she asked, snapping my eyes back to her emeralds.
“Yes, please.” I made my way to the worktop. Mackenzie and I shared an apartment together. It was a gift from Uncle Alex, and Mackenzie kindly let me stay. I could stay in the university dorm, but Mackenzie needed a friend, so she asked me to be with her. Even Uncle Alex asked me the same. Said he needed someone to watch over his daughter. I smiled at the memory.
I sat on the stool and grabbed the coffee Mackenzie had poured for me. I combined them with six spoons of sugar and milk. “Jesus, Rach.” Her face scowled in disgust. Yeah yeah, unlike her, I was a sweet tooth like my mother. “What time will you finish today?”
“Maybe around one, depending on how long Dunn consults with them. And then I will go straight to Coffee Club.”
“Why do you have to work there anyway? I mean, I like the place. Aunt Eva used to work there too. But I thought you had your final project to attend to.”
“I have, but I also need money. Besides, I’m taking this major to help you later.”
“You don’t really need to do that. Besides—” I didn’t let her explain further as I grabbed the toast from the plate and had another drink.
“I’m going. I can’t be late to see my professor.”
“You mean the professor who has had his eyes on you since you were in his class?” she scowled. I only smiled and kissed her cheek.
“I’ll bring something home tonight.”
“Don’t need to. I’m working tonight, and I don’t know until what time.”
“Oh, okay. I’ll be going now.”
“Rachel,” she stopped me. And without looking at her, “You will be okay,” she said. Those words. Those words still gave me the same effect in the past five years. Humiliation.
“Okay,” I muttered.
“Can I kick his balls?”
I laughed. “Maybe.”
“Then, I will gladly do so.”
I giggled again and turned to my best friend for life. “See you around, Kenzie.” I walked out of our flat.
As I was out, I landed my back at the door. Pressing my hand on my chest, “I’m not a disgrace. I’m just…me. Cameron is the bad guy here. He will always be,” I told myself.
I had stopped looking for prince charming since Cameron screwed up my life. Prince charming didn’t exist anyway. I was stupid for still hoping. I could have anyone besides Cameron. I didn’t need him. How many times had I told myself I could find someone other than Cameron? There were plenty of guys out there. A fish for me to catch. Or maybe it was just as my mother told me. It was hard to forget our first love, especially when we knew they were the one.
Bullshit.
Cameron was not the one for me. I didn’t want to hope for him again.
Are you sure?
“Oh, just shut up.”
Shaking my head, I convinced my legs to move.
Away from my questionable thoughts.
- Writer
