The Lost Mate (Lost Mates Next Generation Book 1)

5 years ago     FLEUR     Smoothing my sweaty hands down the legs of my jeans I stared at my reflection in the full-length mirror. I looked good. My skin was bright, my cheeks slightly rosy. My lips were shiny with gloss. Yes, I looked good. Even my hair was behaving. Falling in a long blonde mane down my back. Everything was perfect. Which was good. Because inside I was a mess. I had been a mess for years. Since the moment I had found out that my mate was gone. Everyone, my parents included had told me it would get easier. That the empty black hole of despair that had opened up in my stomach that day would heal. It didn’t. The only thing that had gotten better was my ability to hide my misery from the people who loved and cared for me.  I got up, studied, went to every family function I couldn’t get out of and the whole time I cried myself to sleep every night and then woke up the next morning bleary eyed, knowing I would have to do it all again. After Noah had been lost I threw myself into my studies.  Only by acing my degree would I ever be able to escape. I loved my parents, hell I loved Noah’s parents as well. I loved the whole gang. The mismatched pack that my father Requiem had built around himself but being with them constantly just made the pain worse. I needed to spread my wings. Escape and try to get over the pain and heartbreak. It was the only way I would ever be able to get over him. Noah. My beautiful mate. Who had been snatched away from me before my nineteenth birthday.  We should have had our entire lives together. “Flo?” Schooling my face into a smile, I turned towards my mum. Who was hovering in the doorway. She wore the same kind of look that I did. Like she was putting on a show as well. Hiding behind her smile. “Hey, mum.” “You doing ok Flo?” Her eyes swept down my outfit before settling back on my face. Her use of my old pet name made me smile.  It had been years since she used it. “Yeah, just saying goodbye to the old room.” Something flickered into her eyes. “You don’t need to say goodbye to it. It’s your room, it will always be your room.” “I know mum.” Sighing I heaved my case from the bed and onto the floor. “You don’t have to move out. Why don’t you take a year before you ..” “No mum.” Shaking my head I whirled on her. We’d had this conversation so many times since I graduated. She wanted me to stay close. To get a job with my father’s company. And for anyone but me, it would make perfect sense. I couldn’t stay here though. I was twenty-two years old and I was alone. My chance at a happily ever after had been taken from me when I was nineteen when my mate went and got himself killed. There was nothing but pain and memories here for me now. Noah’s ghost would forever haunt me. And I couldn’t stand it a moment longer. “You know I can’t mum. I have a job and an apartment waiting for me.” “I don’t like the idea of you being so far away .” Tears sprang into her eyes. Jesus, she was going to try and guilt me into staying. They all would. Why couldn’t they realise that I needed this? “London is a few hours away. Dad could fly to me in less time.” Curling my arm around her shoulders I hugged her tight. “I will be fine mum, you need to stop worrying.” “I’m your mum, it’s my job to worry.” Smiling against her hair I tightened my grip. “I love you, mum.” “I love you too Flo. We all love you. Now if you are sure you really want to do this. Then it’s time to say goodbye to everyone.” A lump formed in my throat. Everyone. Roman and Rory were downstairs. I would need to say goodbye to them as well. Noah’s parents. And by saying goodbye to them I would be finally saying goodbye to him.