Chapter 9: Apprehension
1160 Words
Zhivka
Could I be wrong? I’d had enough! I got to think that walking away from the pack that bullied me everytime was going to be better. Or was it? And yet, when I thought about Alpha Ivan and Luna Mariyka or even Beta Zeith, who I actually admired, I just couldn’t. They were bigger than my being a coward. I was part of this pack, so I had to toughen up! Even though it was truly an arduous effort on my part.
It was depressing, I knew. However, this bunch of a-holes just wanted to kick me away, and I wouldn’t give them the satisfaction to become successful. I’d stay until my breath expired!
Last night, Gavril and the others ganged up on me in the forest. I thought what I’ve done was already forgotten, but he held a grudge. Of course, the shifter was a petty one.
They left me wounded and bruised in the forest after that. I so hated them! But I couldn’t do anything even though I tried.
Sometimes I wished I was reborn and become one of the strongest in the pack. Not that I aimed to be an Alpha because that was too much to ask for. Maybe like Beta Zeith, at least. He was strong, was given important tasks in the pack, not necessarily a bully—just neutral—and above all, he was really good-looking, well-built and all a girl could be attracted to.
Wait, did I just wish to become a man?
I grimaced at this thought and shook my head. Certainly, it wouldn’t happen. I was just getting carried away by my thoughts. How could I even become a man? That was impossible!
I sighed while my reverie strayed to the blind girl I admired. Okay, I had a crush on her. That was for real and for certain now.
I’m gay. Zaebi! (F*ck it!) I’m gay! I just realized it was now unequivocal.
I put my hands on my face, listening to the babbling of the river and my hard breathing. My thighs were slightly apart, and my elbows were on my knees.
I suddenly heard steps coming from the woods behind me. To my amazement, I saw her. At first, I stared at her and followed her with my light brown orbs. Oh, she was really beautiful! Today, she wore the same green cape but a different dress.
Sh*t! I remembered I dreamed about her last night while recuperating somewhere in a cave. I couldn’t let Alpha Ivan or Luna Mariyka see me in that state, so I hid there.
In my dream, I was wounded and entered my crush’s domain, and I found out she was a sorceress. Worst, she almost blasted me into pieces. But it couldn’t be right since it was autumn in my dream. And yeah, it was only a dream. It couldn’t be true, could it?
But my jaw hung when I saw her being carried by the wind. What the f*ck? Was this another dream?
I slapped my cheek and groaned. It hurt! Sh*t. This was my waking moment, all right.
As quickly as I could, I shifted and followed her as quietly as I could. She stopped for a second, and her feet were back on the ground. Her head turned in my direction.
Did she hear me… or just feel me?
I went still as a rock, didn’t want to let her know I was right here, several meters away from her. I now confirmed that she did have great senses for a blind person. All right, she was just an ordinary person but a witch. Or maybe a sorceress, someone who practiced black magic. Why else was she here in the forest? But was she alone? Was she living alone and not with her coven or a family of her own?
I must be careful. She and her coven might be a threat to the Silvermoon Pack. I heard from Alpha Ivan that this was the place the pack stayed the longest. When he was little and before taking over as the Alpha, he told me they always moved around because a certain Shadow coven wanted to eradicate the entire pack. He didn’t tell me the reason though. The feud already existed even before Alpha Ivan was born.
Oh, what have I gotten myself into? Most probably, I’ll also be one of the targets of the Shadow coven as I’m already part of the pack. I never thought of this before, just that I was eager to be a part of the pack, to call family.
And that was what happened. I just got stuck with the pack because I didn’t want to be alone and because Alpha Ivan wanted me in it. But whenever I was in pain, I couldn’t help but considering walking away. But still, I stayed. I was really going in circles. It was pathetic and frustrating! I didn’t want Alpha Ivan or Luna Mariyka down, so I had to man up.
As usual, I just stalked the blind girl and admired her beauty.
***
Another night and we were given the task to hunt for food. We did gather and brought in a lot of meat, but then Alpha Ivan sent me with the Lambdas and a few Gammas even in the middle of the day to be trained more by them—in hunting. I could see the hostility in Gavril’s and Blagun’s eyes but I ignored it. What was new anyway?
“How are we to train this glupak (fool), Blagun?” asked Gavril in our open mind link.
I rolled my eyes. They knew I could hear it too because it was opened for the hunting. We only closed our mind link whenever we wanted privacy, and privacy was not a thing right now.
We spread out, running in the woods and searching for a prey. Brown bears. I was looking out for the paw prints, so I was kind of left behind. I sniffed the air, but I couldn’t catch a whiff of any bear nearby.
I wanted to tell them there was no need for them to train me when they didn’t even know how to teach and were no better than Beta Zeith or Alpha Ivan, of course. Klincha! (meaning to try to avoid an obligation) But I held my thoughts. Oh, well… at least I tried. My thought was already out in the open because of our mind link. Zaebi!
“Oh, you already put your hood after the rain, Omega. You said klincha? How dare you!” Gavril roared in our mind link.
I saw his gray form halt about a hundred meters ahead of me. He looked at me with those blazing reddish brown eyes of his. His mouth was open as though he was ready to attack me, and… yeah, he was coming right at me with Blagun.
Oh, sh*t! Again?
- Writer
